No, I’m not your dad. I’m sorry, champ.
The lawyer has lady humps and bumps.
Kailyn reports back to Jordan and he supports her. He asks if she worries about seeing Slo Jo again and she says she’s not looking forward to it. Jordan’s probably hoping she won’t sleep with Slo Jo in the jury room.
Jenelle is still whining about the crappy detox kit she bought that made her fail her drug test. She goes to visit her old friend, Tori. She tells Tori the reason she stopped by was because she’s not allowed to hang out with her real friends. Tori is cool with hanging out with Jenelle as long as Keiffer isn’t around. Jenelle says that’s not problem because he’s in New Jersey.
So, I have no one left. Sorry I beat you up. Wanna go see Ke$ha?
Jenelle makes a peace offering and invites Tori to go see Ke$ha with her in Raleigh in a couple days. Tori accepts. Jenelle voices over “I may be going to jail, but at least I have the concert to look forward to”. There you go… the glass is half-full in this chick’s brain.
Jenelle is at home with her mom and Jace and voice-overs that since she already failed her drug test that she’s been smoking a lot lately. (She should have smoked before this scene.) She also mentions that she’s looking forward to the concert.
Her attorney, Dustin, calls her to give her the two options: 45 days in jail or just stay on probation. Jenelle goes into weed panic and says she can’t quit smoking. Someone mentioned that the way she talks about weed, you’d think there is no way to get off the drug.
No one leaves Ke$ha in the corner.
Barbara asks what Dustin said and Jenelle tells her the options. She follows the options up with “can you believe that”? Believe what, Jenelle? That you either go to jail for a short period of time or that you finish out your probation? What are you hoping to get about failing a drug test, WHILE ON PROBATION? Barbara doesn’t see why she can’t just quit smoking and over in the corner, Jace starts throwing books on the floor. Jenelle won’t stop texting while her mom is giving her advice and their voices escalate. Jace runs over and jumps on Jenelle and starts howling. CAN ANYONE SEE THIS KID IS IN DANGER HERE? Jenelle looks at Jace and says “Jace, tell mama to shut up!”
I am literally screaming for help.
Doesn’t anyone hear my cries for help?