Last week on Teen Mom, Catelynn and Tyler have their 2nd year visit, Amber hopes to see Leah, Maci is annoying, and Farrah is still a nasty bitch.
Catelynn and Tyler get their caps and gowns in and try them on. Poor Catelynn still hasn’t changed her ‘do and it’s bigger than ever.
Bless her sweet little heart.
Catelynn tries to reach her mom about a pre-graduation BBQ and if she’s heard from Butch at all. Tyler says he’s prepared himself for the letdown of his dad not showing up for graduation. It’s really sad, because we all know that Butch won’t make it. If Butch has made two Christmases in Tyler’s life, he’s certainly not going to make his graduation. Catelynn and Tyler talk about how they’re happy they’ve changed and matured since having Carly. Maybe I should watch that episode of 16 & Pregnant so I can see for myself if they were these terrible kids they say they were, because I have a hard time believing it.
Over in Chattanooga, Maci is continuing her slow traumatizing of Bentley by asking him if he’s going to miss her and Kyle while he spends a week at the beach with Ryan and his family. Maci pipes up that maybe she should happen to go down to Florida, too. Oh yeah, that won’t be obvious at all.
Let’s call it what it is.
I’d make fun of Maci’s horrible skin, but I don’t really have room to talk. Oh, fuck it. Yes I will. That girl looks like she has a 5 o’clock shadow of acne. She’s taken out her weave, which just leaves her hair looking piddly as hell. There’s something about girls with horrible acne. They tend to wear thick, oily foundation and never use powder, eyeliner, blush, or mascara. Balance, girls! I’m so pale I’m clear, so I realize I can’t just go around wearing foundation and nothing else or I’ll look like Powder.
Kyle says he can’t go on the espionage trip to Florida for he has a car show he promised to attend. I’m guessing he’s going to wear a bikini and do a booty pose on the hood of a souped-up Mustang. He tells her that SHE can go, though, and make it a girls trip. Yeah, he sounds really committed to this relationship what with prodding her to do something totally desperate.
The deal is that Ryan is supposed to have Bentley for an entire week without her interference, so this sounds like a gem of an idea. She says that she’ll just say she’s down there for support if they should get tired of having Bentley around. I completely understand missing your child if they’re away from you like that, but my God woman. I have that right, because I’m married to my child’s father so there’s no reason for me to be separated from our kid if I don’t want to be. I used to like Maci. I understood her problem with Ryan. I wanted to knock him out when she came home from work at 2AM while he had been in bed for hours and he told her she was lazy for asking him to get a crying Bentley at 5AM. My my, how the tables have turned.
Maci clearly wants Kyle to be jealous about her plan to go down to Florida with Ryan while he poses on cars. He’s not at all concerned. He’s basically shoving her out the door.
Michael, Farrah, and Sophia have arrived in Florida. I’m willing to gamble that Michael moved all the furniture into the new apartment while Farrah stood around yelling at him and rolling her eyes. Where’s Dexter when you need him? They should have gone to Miami instead of Ft. Lauderdale. The trio heads out to the beach with a kite. While Michael tries to get knots out of the kite, Sophia screams at him to get it done NOW. Aw, how sweet. Just like her mother. Michael snaps at Farrah to watch the baby so she doesn’t get sucked in by the tide. At this point, I wouldn’t mind seeing both of these bitches carried off by a strong current.