Teen Mom Recap: Bad Decisions

15 Comments

1. 1
   sardini
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 9:30 am

   OMG – the whole, “I’m speaking calmly, you’re the one yelling” bit makes me homicidal. My husband pulls that crap and he’s lucky he makes it through the night! When you’re saying horrible things, the delivery isn’t important.

   I think they revealed in previous seasons that Tyler used to have a disciplinary problem. So hard to believe with a role model like Butch in the picture, right? I’m so glad they’re not pregnant again. I hope with all my heart that Catelyn really makes something of her life. If they don’t make it, Tyler can find someone else, but I’m worried for her. She has all her eggs in ONE basket, and that basket is Tyler.

   So Farrah lives, literally 5 minutes from me now in Hollywood, FL (not exactly Fort Lauderdale but close enough). I have not seen her and I don’t want to. I understand resenting that horrible mother of hers, but Michael is a sweetheart and I wish I had a father like him. I often wonder how it would’ve played out if Derek didn’t die. Would they be together? Would they be in a custody battle? Would he be secretly banging Maci at the reunions?

   Maci is annoying and overly tanned. But I don’t fear for Bentley’s life the way I do some of the other babies.

   Amber is so heartbreaking. Something has to be seriously f-ed up in her head for her to make the decisions she has. I wish Brandon and Theresa would adopt Leah.

   I’m giving birth in 7 weeks. I just can’t imagine bringing my sweet little baby into any of these situations.

2. 2
   msjacqmills
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 10:49 am

   In answer to your question about Catelynn and Tyler on their 16 & pregnant episode – they were just as awesome then as they are now – and that is some serious, kick-ass, awesomeness. They replayed it a few weeks ago, and they had me crying all over again. Watching them give that baby up was heart-wrenching and heartwarming at the same time. You could tell it was breaking their heart after she was born, and they wanted to keep her so badly, but they truly wanted better for their baby than what they could give. Those are two very brave, very strong kids. It is truly a miracle that those 2 kids have such great heads on their shoulders. I wish all of these stupid kids having babies had the bravery to give their babies the life that Carly has.

3. 3
   bumblebee
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 12:48 pm

   I love being from the Midwest, but bad hair is not limited to Michigan. I’m in college in the Chicago area and that half pulled-through ponytail on top of the head like on Catelynn’s friend is rampant. It’s usually the same girls who, a few seasons ago, were wearing Uggs with leggings and/or shorts even though it was 150 degrees outside. I blame Brittney Spears.

   I used to think Chelsea was the most annoying Teen Mom cast member (her affected accent makes me stabby, it’s like she’s too lazy to form complete words), but Farrah really has me also praying for an incredibly tiny hurricane to sweep her away. She is such an insufferable brat. I don’t think anything would be different if her boyfriend hadn’t died. She most likely would have alienated his family and still be carrying on exactly as she is. She’d just have more to whine about and more people to snap at.

   And I can’t even imagine what kind of crappy “culinary school” she went to when the dumb ass almost set her kitchen on fire trying to boil water in season 2.

4. 4
   April
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 1:24 pm

   Referring to Maci’s friends as a “Coven” was genius. Maybe I am just jealous because I had like maybe one friend when I was Maci’s age, but whatever.

5. 5
   kthxbai
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 2:29 pm

   @Sugarbush We have this trashy reality show viewing game we play. Where the 1st person to yell LEOPARD! every time somebody has some on wins.

   But now we’re going to start yelling LEOPARD VOMIT!

   Just so you know you’re not just writing funny recaps. But making improvements to real people’s lives.

6. 6
   amandalee27
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 4:28 pm

   Bahahaha Dexter.

7. 7
   Andyourlittledogtoo
   Posted June 22, 2012 at 5:13 pm

   Great recap. My favorite part:

   “She looks like she’s been in a Bedazzler accident. ”

   I may have to borrow that one sometime. Perfect.

   Ah, Catelynn. I love you to death, but the hair. The BOW in the hair. Please stop. Just stop.

   I have to admit I dvr’d this one but haven’t watched it yet because I may need to get drunk first. I mean, there’s Catelynn’s hair. Sigh. And the extra super duper even for her bitchiness of Farrah, plus the whole puppy thing (puppy mill dog, in a plastic cage, spanked for not already being potty trained, chewing on an electrical cord, yadda yadda yadda…there’s just too much there to cringe about). And then there’s the extra super duper manipulative delusions of Maci and her coven following Ryan down to Florida because he is so not over her (yeah right). Kyle is so phoning it in right now. And finally the fake ass enabling ‘holistic’ rehab crap MTV and Dr Drew arranged for Amber and the neverending cosigning of Amber’s terrible personality and behavior. And isn’t that the same faux rehab facility they sent Jenelle of Team Mom 2 to last time? Their track record with therapy of Teen Moms is 0 for 2, and on national television too! Great PR guys, I know I’ll think of you if I ever need to refer someone for help. It wouldn’t surprise me if their idea of therapy was sipping margaritas on the patio between pilates sessions and spiritualist readings. God I love Malibu.

8. 8
   sheesh
   Posted June 23, 2012 at 5:09 am

   @Sardini…a baby! Awesome.
   Boy? Girl?
   Name?

   I want that doggie!

9. 9
   Classy Drunk
   Posted June 23, 2012 at 10:02 am

   Farrah. There are just no words for you. I can’t see being a little pissy with your mother, but your father, after he drove all of your stuff down and moved it all in? Sophia is going to be a terror. The psychiatrist said you have to give your parents time to accept that you guys are leaving.

   Gary. Could you get any fatter? Come on!

   Amber. She looks like she’s still drugged out.

   Maci. I don’t think Ryan is holding the torch anymore, and since you have a boyfriend you probably shouldn’t compare yourself to your baby daddies girlfriends.

   Kyle. run

   Cate and Ty. congrats! I def teared up watching you guys walk across the stage.

10. 10
    Liz
    Posted June 23, 2012 at 3:48 pm

    I’m starting to think Maci is depressed. This season, she’s always in sweatpants, and almost never has her hair done or makeup on. I’m not at all saying if you dress in sweatpants and don’t do your hair and makeup you’re depressed, only that people who normally do those things and then stop often stop when they get depressed. Could help explain why she’s being so awful all the time now.

11. 11
    ratgirl
    Posted June 23, 2012 at 8:42 pm

    Thank you thank you thank you for calling out Petland on their complete irresponsibility when it came to keeping that puppy out of Farrah’s completely irresponsible hands. I’ve worked in rescue for a long time and steam started shooting out of my ears when she barely took a breath between announcing that she dumped one tragic puppy mill dog and running out to buy a new tragic puppy mill dog. Anyone who has worked with dogs at all hears, “The dog was too hyper and didn’t listen,” as, “I bought a puppy and he acted like a puppy and I didn’t like that so I got rid of him. Oh, and I couldn’t be bothered to spend any time training him either and it’s totally the dog’s fault.” Yet Petland happily plops that puppy right into Farrah’s hands. Nice.

    Then, lo and behold, when the dog pees on the floor, what does she do? She puts the dog in the crate practically mid-pee. Did she take the dog outside and show him where to go? Did she even take him outside and let him *finish*? Shall we start taking bets on how long *this* dog lasts before ending up given away or dumped in a shelter?

    Petland (and similar stores that sell animals), you should be ashamed of yourselves. Not that that’s anything new, but this just underlines your gross irresponsibility and obvious lack of caring about any of the animals you stock. I guess I never doubted that, to pet stores, animals are nothing more than inventory, but at the same time, it’s painful to watch it happen right in front of you.

12. 12
    Poopsicle
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 7:25 am

    Farrah should be banned from having any more dogs, children, parents, or dead boyfriends. Seriously, how do you treat your father that way after when he bends over backwards for you. What a fucking cunt and a half. I never really mean it when I say I hope someone gets their ass beat, but with Farrah-I hope someone karate kicks the hell out of her. Sophia is already turning into a disrespectful brat just like her mom. I would NEVER allow my kids to speak to their grandparents like that, she should of been corrected asap. But this is dumbass wormy faced Farrah I’m talking about. As far as the puppy goes, that Petland is one fucked up place and should be shut down asap. Farrah is the worst thing that can happen to a dog. I never understand theses lazy fuckers that buy a dog and expect it to be potty trained by shoving it in a cage! Take it outside ASSHOLE! that’s how they learn. I took my dogs outside every half hour when they were pups and in 2 weeks they were completely house broken. She’s such a lazy moron. And I don’t buy the boo hoo I miss Derek scenes either, she doesn’t miss him. She just feels guilty for treating him like shit when he was alive.
    I think I hate Maci now.

13. 13
    Sugarbush
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 8:34 am

    @Poopsicle – I’m not sure which I love more, what you had to say or your name.

14. 14
    April
    Posted June 25, 2012 at 3:07 pm

    So I don’t know if I am happy or embarrassed to report this Gasmii but I am one degree of party puking from Maci and two degrees from Snooki most likely. Let me explain….

    So this weekend for the first time in like 5 years I went out drinking with my BFF while my kids were at home with Daddy. We went to a club and a bar and took a cab from the bar to the club and then the taxi from the club home. On the way to the club we chatted with the taxi driver. He was super cool and told us that he has actually driven Maci from Teen Moms around. Okay. Well on the way back I was stupid drunk puking girl because I drank too much and was puking in a bag in his taxi. I said I was embarrassed and the taxi driver laughed and said “Don’t feel bad Maci puked in my taxi too!”

    So yes, Maci and I have puked in the exact same cab. Yay? I figure since Maci partied with Snooki that one time it is possible there was puking which makes me two degrees from the infamous Snooki herself. I am legend. LOL!

15. 15
    7cinta
    Posted September 15, 2012 at 1:53 am

    YES!!!! Finally a blog that is biased to Maci, her stans are very much alive and crazy! I used to like her and I still think she is a great mother but I think she is very much passive aggressive. Ryan was shit in the beginning but I honestly think he is trying .