Teen Mom Recap: Education Cockblock

27 Comments

1. 1
   begonia skies
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 5:21 pm

   i love that cate and tyler’s trailer park has a board to okay people to live there. i thought people went to live in trailer parks because they’re criminals? anyway butch can come live with me, i’d love to braid his rat tail.

2. 2
   melli
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 5:38 pm

   Ryan isn’t 20. Ryan is about 4 and a half years older than Maci which would make him 24 or 25. Ryan being almost 25 and unemployed while still living at home with his parents and driving 40K + cars around all the while still not seeing the value of preschool makes him all the more sexier. Ryan may be 25 but he is still emotionally a teenager.

   Is it me or has Maci been dropping Bentley off at daycare/preschool for 2 seasons now? It’s the storyline that never ends. Kind of like Ryan pretending like he actually wants to fight Maci for joint custody. Yeah right. If he actually wanted it he would have gotten his act together by now and had it. Even right now in real time he still doesn’t have joint custody. He must be too busy driving his friends around in his new toys.

   “Bitch” must run in Farrah’s family.

3. 3
   Lisa
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 5:45 pm

   The trailer park boys reference has led me to post for the first time ever, although I read these recaps on my “break” at work all the time! (and you are right, one of the funniest shows ever – everyone should take a rainy weekend and watch every season back to back). Okay, I also adore the recaps on this site and they fill in for the shows themselves for me in some cases. In the case of Teen Mom I read the recap first and then watch the show because it makes it so much more entertaining. I actually watched the show with MY teenager (who had to be extremely bored, she belittles me for my MTV/BRAVO reality habits) and her running commentary on the cast was so dead on that I almost cried tears of relief that she is probably going to turn out JUST FINE!

4. 4
   OhSnap
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 5:46 pm

   “Maybe if your parents didn’t wipe your ass for you years beyond what is normal, you wouldn’t be such a dipshit.” Absolutely love it and it totally fits my baby daddy as well. Ha. I may have to use that one in the future!

5. 5
   BedHeadJen
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 5:55 pm

   You know what is really hard to paint with nail polish? A fishie. Farrah promised Sophia a fishie but pulled a 52 fakeout at the pet store and bought herself a dog. I called bullshit then, and apparently Sophia feels the same way. Stitch must have been a bad pooch in his past life to get adopted by the Manson family.

   There was entirely too much crazy in this episode for me to digest in one sitting, but I will have to watch it later. I am busy packing to take my Pez collecting kid to her first Pez convention. If that ain’t love (or La in Maci-glish) for a child, then I don’t what is.
   Sugarbush, Perfect as always! You are the neighbor I’ve always wanted, but have never had.

6. 6
   Lopezgirl
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 6:16 pm

   Kudos to be given out. #1 sugarbush. Great recap. When Gary’s mom tumbled I cracked up and thought MTV has no editing. I’m glad they don’t. #2 bhj. Yes. Your so right u can’t paint a fish. Which is why it’s an appropriate pet when ur 2! Lastly #3 Debra …. You finally said what America is thinking. You have no friends because of the way u act!!! The way they treat her is crazy. So much more going on there that we don’t see. I feel Catelyn n Tyler have no story left. And I love them but they are boring. Maci put him in day care or don’t. We don’t even care anymore. And Ryans not the only one w a pimped out car. Kyle n Maci have some nice rides too!

7. 7
   Sugarbush
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 7:13 pm

   @Lopezgirl – Thanks! Yeah, I noticed that Maci has a sweet new 4-door Wrangler and even Cate and Ty are riding around in the trailer park in a brand new Caddi. WTH is with these kids? How about a Civic or a Prius?

8. 8
   Andyourlittledogtoo
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 7:47 pm

   I just want to say for the record that I thought Farrah was TRYING to be a good/better mother to Sophia, I never said she was SUCCEEDING. LOL

   These people exhaust me.

9. 9
   Chicken Lips
   Posted July 18, 2012 at 7:49 pm

   So, did Sophia hear Farrah talk about vajazzling, so she decided to peenazzle the dog? I don’t get it – that was a lot of decoration on that area. Maybe the dog laid it a pool of it on the floor?

   Lord knows my family will NEVER win the “functional family of the year award”, but DAMN! We look like the frickin’ Bradys compared to Farrah’s crew. And I think Debra always looks so beaten down because she is coming to the realization that she has raised two of the most ungrateful bitches in the entire world. Maybe she doesn’t talk to you at home, Ass-ley, because she’s tired of listening to your snot bag attitude. She was probably trying to talk to you in public because she thinks that even though she clearly didn’t raise you right, she was under the mistaken impression that you has a modicum of common sense to not make a scene in public like that. Sorry, Debra, wrong again.

   “My mom does such a terrible job looking after my daughter and is just a terrible person, so I’m going to leave my daughter with her so I can go out.” There is so much to say about that, I can’t even formulate it.

   I also didn’t go to preschool, but there were kids that I played with on the block, so it wasn’t like I was hanging out with my mom and her “boyfriend” (in our house, it was my dad) exclusively all day. I managed to make it through 20 years of school just fine. However, I do think they need to take him somewhere unless they want Bentley to plan a “Throw Momma from the Train” moment. But I did think it was priceless that Ryan’s mom was kinda on board with the preschool thing, especially after Ryan pointed out that he never went to preschool and suddenly she’s seen the error of her ways.

10. 10
    melli
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 9:21 pm

    Sugarbush- They do drive expensive cars but we really don’t know how much they’re paid. Maybe their salary can justify it. We know, thanks to Amber’s court documents, that by or before season 2 they were making more than $280,00. And since then this show has been a huge ratings success for MTV so I assume their salary has substantially increased just like the jersey shore kids. When you factor in all the tabloid covers they’ve been on which pay by the 10′s of thousands plus all the speaking engagements that (Maci, Farrah, and Catelynn do) which also pay by the 10′s of thousands plus all the other gigs that we don’t know about. I don’t think people realize just how lucrative a successful reality show gig can actually be. It’s almost like winning the lottery.

    I’m willing to bet my house that both Maci and Farrah (they get the most gigs outside of this show) have banked more than a million by now. Maybe a couple million. And they’ve both wisely invested their money into entrepreneurial pursuits. They’re not stupid. They know this won’t last forever.

    As much as everyone hates Farrah she will be the most successful one after this show ends. She won’t even need the teen mom money anymore. She has a book out, a sauce she made is going to be distributed to grocery stores across the country, she’s working on getting her own healthy snack line in high school vending machines across the country, she’s been signed to a model agency in L.A., and is allegedly getting her own spin off show about her new life in L.A. Who says driven bitches can’t be successful?

    I wonder why they never include any of this in the show. We just get to see one piece of their life. And that piece for the most part is staged and heavily edited at that.

    I hate to say it but Tyler and Catelynn aren’t very smart. I mean they’re incredibly emotionally intelligent but that’s about it. I mean it took them a 16 and pregnant episode plus 4 seasons of teen mom just to graduate from high school.They are the only ones from that cast who haven’t pursued any entrepreneurial ventures (even Gary has although unsuccessfully) . Plus they just bought a house. I think that’s a stupid decision at such a young age because a house chains you to a location and is huge money sucker. They’ve already settled and I hate it. I come from a worse background than them and managed to graduate on time with honors as well as leaving my poor shithole of a neighborhood and horrible family behind. I wanted more for myself. I wanted to be successful and live the good life and I’ve achieved that. I was driven. Even though I have nothing in common with Farrah (more like Amber and Catelynn) I love her drive and can relate to it. She’s already made it.

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    BedHeadJen
    Posted July 18, 2012 at 11:55 pm

    @Chickenlips-Lol! Because I feel I have a duty to harass mysleeping husband as much as possible, I just whispered ‘where is the peenazzler’ into his ear. He told me to grab the boxes. Good times!

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    jane
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 4:05 am

    @chickenlips I thought the same thing re: Farrah hating her mother, yet leaving her child with her. That seems so bizarre to me. And omg(!), did Debra ever channel Carrie White’s mother with her, “Baby Goo, do you want to pray with me?” That was all kinds of scary.

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    Lisa
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 6:17 am

    yeah, Debra is a little strange, and I am so glad she is not my Mother, but for the simple fact that she provided Farrah with a shelter over her head, clothes to wear and food to eat while she was growing up, for that alone, Farrah should show a little bit of respect

14. 14
    Sugarbush
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 6:45 am

    @Melli – I agree that Farrah will probably be the most well-off financially in the end, but I think the definition of “success” is different from person to person. I, personally, don’t define “success” as having money in the bank and being an entrepreneur. I wouldn’t say that Charlie Sheen is successful in life, because is there anyone around him to loves him? It’s all great to have a career and money, but in the end on your deathbed what are you going to regret more – the way you treated people and how much love you and gave received, or how much money you made and how big your house was? And I’m in no way saying that you’re a money-grubbing bitch. lol I don’t know you nor do cameras follow you around, so I have no clue. I also think that just because they have fat paychecks from MTV, which I totally realize, doesn’t mean they should drive really expensive cars. Someone needs to sit down with these kids and give them financial advise badly. Just because you have tons of money doesn’t mean you don’t need to be sensible. These kids are far too young and this money isn’t coming from a real career.

    And the thing about Farrah and Debra… I don’t think anyone has alluded to the fact that Debra is a saint and innocent victim in all of this. Not at all. I just don’t think fighting fire with fire does anyone any good and I have a feeling Farrah’s never tried anything but that. What happened to you growing up is your parents’ fault (generally, if they were involved in it). However, what happens to you as an adult is your fault. You choose your life as an adult. I don’t know what’s happened to Farrah, but I know what’s happened to me and I know what’s happened to people close to me. For someone whom I love endlessly, their life growing up was far beyond anything Farrah could ever imagine. I can say that with full confidence as it’s unfathomable what she went through. But, when she had her daughter at 17, she left her hometown, got her shit together, worked hard, and now she’s a woman anyone would be proud to know. She has two kids and a husband, all who love her very much. She’s not at all passing onto her children the same treatment she received as a child from the adults around her. Her kids know absolutely nothing of the life from which she came. I’m beyond proud of her, because I know that’s not an easy process. It has to do with inner strength. And Farrah needs a good counselor. In my opinion, any counselor that would allow the MTV cameras into their sessions isn’t a good one. MTV doesn’t rule these kids’ lives – they can do whatever they damn well please. In the end, MTV isn’t going to kill them or turn them into slaves. Screw money – take care of yourself. And, for the love of God, if you can’t have a health relationship with your parents, cut them out of your life for now. Save yourself and your child.

15. 15
    cloudsinmycoffee
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 7:49 am

    14- @Sugarbush, Here here!!! And do you honestly ever see Farrah actually cutting her parents out of her life? then who would babysit Sophia while she went to go tanning/do her nails/hang with friends/or whatever she does when she visits with them in Oregon or Iowa or wherever the hell she’s from? Farrah will never cut her parents out of her life because she needs them in order to just be a layabout when she wants to. I don’t think Farrah is a grown up parent at all, she keeps putting her child off on her parents and not really getting the idea of “parenting”. It isn’t that she doesn’t love her child, she does, I just think she has no idea what a parent is supposed to do other than dress her child up as a doll.

16. 16
    Dtoast
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 8:36 am

    I almost died laughing when Butch said “if anything I do cocaine and marijuana” bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

17. 17
    Karen
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 10:17 am

    Coming from a background where there was family abuse I can FIRMLY say i would NEVER leave my child with my mother. So when Farrah leaves Sophia every other minute with Deborah it just re-enforces the fact that she is not only a selfish piece of crap, ungrateful wretched human being…but she is also a horrible parent. If you KNOW they lady would slap/punch her child…then why and how could you leave a young child who is incapable of speech and defending herself alone with this person? Farrah is a piece of crap!

18. 18
    JudgyWudgy
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 2:50 pm

    Yes Ryan, you didn’t go to preschool and your coddled, entitled ass turned out just fine. It really is important that the cycle is continued. Oh, and your mom fucking sucks.

    What the hell happened in Farrah’s life!? I refuse to make any assumptions but I’m dying to know.

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    JudgyWudgy
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 3:04 pm

    I have to admit I had not read the recap when I left my initial comment, but everything you’ve said about Farrah’s family is exactly how I’m feeling. Especially the stop hypothesizing part. Ha. Love it.

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    JudgyWudgy
    Posted July 19, 2012 at 3:17 pm

    @melli I’m confused how you can defend Farrah due to heavy editing and then in the same breath have the market cornered on Tyler and Catelynn….?

    For the record, I agree about the editing and only showing a portion of their lives, which is why it annoys me when commenters throw out their expert opinions on the abuse these people have suffered. But you can’t defend one person and then know all about another given the same information.

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    melli
    Posted July 20, 2012 at 1:06 am

    I think I was misunderstood. I don’t consider success to be how much money someone has in the bank either. Success is individual. Charlie Sheen is an extreme example though. He’s more like a cautionary tale. There’s no reason why someone can’t have money as well as love and genuine happiness in their life. Money and happiness are not exclusive of each other. My point was that if you’re lucky enough to receive a large windfall of cash at a young age (or any age for that matter) it would be a shame to not try to invest it wisely in a way that will serve you well financially throughout life. To take your small fortune and multiply it and turn it into an even larger fortune thus attaining real wealth (and financial security) for yourself while transforming your life as well as your child’s. The other options would be to save it while not really being able to enjoy it or spend it on normal expenses and watch it slowly dwindle away. Opportunities the likes of which these girls are receiving are rare and don’t come around very often so if you’re presented with them you should be doing everything in your power to take full advantage of them and strike while the iron is hot. I like money for the freedom it brings and not necessarily for the power it brings.

    I completely agree if you can’t have a healthy relationship with your parents or anyone else who’s close to you in life the best course of action would be to save yourself by cutting off all contact with the person. You’ll be amazed at how much better you’ll feel and how much peace you’ll gain from it. You are your environment after all, so if you really want to make a change in yourself, first start by changing your environment.

    I wasn’t defending Farrah. The comment about heavy editing was directed toward all the girls. I agree I really don’t know what Tyler and Catelynn are doing so hopefully they’ll invest their money wisely.

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    Lisa
    Posted July 20, 2012 at 7:33 am

    Butch for President!

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    Suzy (from Ontario,
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 4:56 pm

    I just read in a magazine today that Farrah is on SugarDaddies.com or whatever the url is because she wants to meet a rich older man who will shower her with money because she doesn’t want to have to get a real job and she likes all the nice things that the Mtv money has bought her and wants more. I totally believe that. She may be the most ambitious but she is not very likeable and not very bright overall. I doubt her business ventures will succeed but maybe she’ll get lucky. I can’t imagine a whole spinoff of just her…she’s so rude and so vain and I hate the way she speaks. Weird cadence to her speaking voice. I cannot believe the way she treats her Mom and Dad after all they do for her, especially her Dad! She doesn’t seem to think about anyone except herself and she has a pretty high opinion of herself. It’s not hard to see why she has no friends. Frankly, if Sophia’s bio Dad hadn’t been killed in a car accident I guarantee she’d be bitching about him and complaining nonstop what a loser he is, but because he’s dead she acts like he was perfect and if he hadn’t been killed they would’ve had this perfect family and it all would’ve been so easy. Please! She doesn’t even want to see his family.

    Cate and Ty…I agree with whoever said they are boring and sort of settling. I really get the feeling that Tyler kind of wishes he could be single for a while but doesn’t want to hurt Catelyn by breaking it off, plus I’m sure he cares for her but he’s made a few comments about how he can’t help wondering about other girls because he’s never had a chance to date anyone else and he’s so young. Plus Catelyn can be very clingy and gets so teary and upset if there’s even a hint that Tyler might want to be alone. She’s very insecure. I think they are both good kids but they are so young and I think if they follow through and get married next year …well, it might last but I think Tyler at least will always wonder what he’s missing. I’d feel better if they had decided to both go off to university at different schools and were able to spend some time apart. Then if they still wanted to be together afterwards I think they’d feel more confident and also feel that they weren’t missing out. Just my opinion. I came from a similar type of dysfunctional background and ended up living with my first boyfriend until I was 22. He was a nice guy but we started dating so young and my home life was so messed up that we were living together by the time I was 18 and we were just used to each other and almost more like brother and sister by the time we split. Looking back I’m glad we did because I got to learn more about myself going through university, having my own apartment, working, etc. and by the time I met my husband I was older and a lot more mature/knew myself better and we’ve been married now for almost 25 years. Ty and Cate might be soulmates, but I just wish they’d give each other a little bit of space to experience things and see if they really miss each other or are just used to and dependant on each other (which can happen when you’re escaping from a lousy home environment and you meet someone who treats you nicely).

    Amber – Obviously we all know rehab didn’t work and she’s in prison now. I recently read that the discipline there is doing her good and that she’s going to classes there to get her GED and taking classes on drug abuse, etc. I hope so. I’d love to see her finish her GED because that is holding her back and dragging down her self=esteem, and maybe once that’s behind her she can move forward to beauty school which is what she used to want. Maybe then she’s be happier and able to become a better parent. I hope she’s taking parenting classes as well and anger management. As for Gary… ugh! Does he work? I feel like Leah is doomed which is so sad because she is just such a sweet little girl.

    Maci – used to admire her and now I think she’s just wasting her opportunities. The whole Kyle thing that she jumped into right after Ryan was such a mistake imo. She should’ve been concentrating on school, letting her parents help her with Bentley and just stayed with them for a few years instead of moving to Nashville, then moving back and moving in with Kyle and now she’s bought a house and is moving in with a bunch of friends. I don’t see that ending well. Ryan needs to get a real job already and figure out what he’s doing with his life. The preschool thing…I don’t think it’s that important as long as Bentley gets to interact with some other kids his age once in a while and they spend time with him at home teaching him things instead of just playing or hanging out.

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    April
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    If Maci really gave a shit about “socializing” Bentley she would have had him doing regular playdates and would have made friends with other moms from infancy. I had zero mom friends when I had my twins. I remedied that quickly for my kids sake and I got benefit from it too. I found moms in a group which Chattanooga has plenty of that had kids of similar age. Then we did regular playdates, parties, outings together. It is not that hard. Yes, my kids go to preschool too but I hate the notion that kids can ONLY socialize by being put in a school or daycare. Not true.

    The problem being Maci did not care to try to be a normal mom. She still wanted to run around with her little friends without kids and that is what she did and just dragged Bentley along for the ride. Not the correct thing to do and that is why he has issues now. My kids did not cry the first day of preschool at age 3. Not a bit. Because they were used to playing with other kids. Other kids were not foreign to them like it is with Bentley. I feel sorry for that little boy that she hardly ever gave him a chance to be around other kids. Even at his own birthday parties it was all adults.

    Dang Ashley went off on her mom! LOL! FTW!

    I about died when Butch was getting all offended that someone called him a drinker. Yes, because cocaine and weed are so much better just don’t call him a drinker!

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    Andyourlittledogtoo
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 7:07 pm

    Okay, I’m gonna share a minute here because… well because. I’ve been in NA for…issues…. but I have never in my entire life had a problem with alcohol. It is extremely rare and hardly anyone ever believes that because it just never happens in most people’s experiences but it is the honest to God truth. I can’t even drink a full bottle of beer without getting bored and putting it down in favor of a Diet Coke. I have no idea what in my genetic makeup made that happen but there it is. But other drugs I can’t even. So I wasn’t so shocked when he said that, although most of the time it’s a total line justification of BS it does happen that drug addiction and alcoholism don’t mesh in the same person. If it didn’t happen to me I wouldn’t believe it either.

    The other thing that I thought was funny though was his indignation about the alcoholism because honestly that is such an NA thing too. I remember we used to talk about it all the time, the only-alcoholic folks we’d meet in AA meetings (because when you’re in NA you often hit both AA and NA meetings depending on scheduling and friendships etc) were of a slightly different personality and lifestyle type and I swear to God we girls would have a hard rule about never getting involved with an AA guy because they were usually a nightmare to have a relationship with. Give us a recovering junkie any day, but not a recovering alcoholic. I know, it makes no sense if you’re not there and I would never be able to convince anyone who isn’t there but that was our take on the two things.

    So when Butch was offended at the allegation that he was a drinker I totally understood that. Alcoholics are a different animal from addicts in some ways that addicts don’t appreciate. At least where I come from. I can’t speak for the attitudes of addicts in other areas of the country. (I never heard anyone tell the AA folks this btw — we liked them and didn’t want to hurt their feelings or anything, just if an AA guy was interested it was just a given that there was no way a relationship with an AA guy was worth the grief of those issues).

    So…that’s my two cents on Butch’s statement.

    I do wish Cate would stop channelling her inner forty year old. I agree that she and Tyler really need to have some time apart or get a life or something so they can, if they are meant to be forever, fully commit. Right now I fear that Tyler will either bolt in an effort to get some life and space or stay because he doesn’t want to be the asshole who left Cate in the eyes of the audience. That is not a good way to start a life together.

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    Andyourlittledogtoo
    Posted July 21, 2012 at 8:24 pm

    I want to add this because I don’t want to lead anyone astray here: 99% of the time, if you are a recovering addict, you have absolutely no business drinking. Period. What I am saying is that some folks are alcoholics by genetic makeup – they just cannot drink ever. They become alcoholics. Other folks can be social drinkers their entire lives with no issues but start using drugs and become addicted (because that is the nature of many drugs, no matter who you are) and then recover and can never touch alcohol again because it will either a) trigger the buzz that sets them off on the drug run again or b) will become a substitute for the drug and become alcoholism. That is almost everyone. What is weirdly rare and I believe a genetic thing in me is that I have no ability to become an alcoholic. I would have to actually make that a goal in life for that to happen. Half a drink and I am slightly warm inside and then become quiet, feel like I ate too much, and search for a place to take a nap. That is not my idea of a good time and I can’t persevere long enough to even get a good buzz on. I bought a bottle of wine once and put it in my pantry and whenever I thought of opening it I just really wanted a Diet Coke. After about five years I was cleaning out my pantry and asked my sister if she thought the wine was still okay, if it had expired. She just stared at me and said, ‘Sure, because everybody knows wine doesn’t age well. Idiot.’ LOL But honestly don’t do this at home, because the likelihood of anyone having this genetic alcohol thing seems to be very rare and I don’t want anyone to think it’s okay to take that risk if you’re recovering.

    The other thing was that as weird as it would be to an outsider, there is snobbery among different addictions. They started Cocaine Anonymous because they didn’t want to associate with the lowly junkies and speedfreaks, they were educated yuppies and coke was TOTALLY different. And marijuana only addicts sometimes have their own meetings as well. And junkies think their total commitment to a lifestyle choice that is hardcore gives them much more street cred and toughness than the banker coke addict or alcoholic who doesn’t even have to break the law in order to get their fix.

    It’s a strange little world. So in that context, Butch’s protestations sounded just like home to me. And I totally get how it sounds to everyone else. Never the minds will meet.

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    katie
    Posted July 22, 2012 at 12:56 pm

    I’m also dying to know what happened in Farrah’s family. What the heck happened there?!?

    But my favorite moment was when Kyle pointed out that the kids in daycare were smarter than him and Maci. He may have thought he was joking, but he was spot on!