The Carrie Diaries Recap: Designer Labels

The Carrie Diaries

Mouse is over at Mags’s house looking for an outfit for her non-date.  Because surely Mags, who is 5’10” has clothes that will fit Mouse, who is 3’9”?!?!   They can’t find anything that fits so they call Carrie to see what she has.  Carrie has an idea, but can’t find the outfit she is looking for.  So she figures The Dorrit has it.  She goes into The Dorrit’s closet and thinks she has found the shoes that go with the outfit slated for Mouse- she opens a shoe box and finds the stolen hamster.  

 I realize these Connecticut kids lead somewhat sheltered lives, but seriously, The Dorrit thinks it is appropriate to keep a hamster in a shoe box at the bottom of her closet????  The Dorrit hears Carrie’s shriek and promptly hangs up the extention- she’s been listening to Carrie’s phone call the whole time.  That’s my Dorrit!!! 

Thankfully, Carrie, a PETA rep in her spare time, informs The Dorrit that she cannot keep the hamster in a shoe box.

On this episode of Pimp My Cage…

It needs to be fed and watered and in a proper cage.  It needs a Habitrail!!!  (although I gave my hamster a Habitrail and the f*cker bit me… repeatedly…maybe because I used to put him on my record player.)  The Dorrit explains she didn’t think she would make it home with the hamster, she assumed she would get caught.  The Dorrit STOLE the hamster.  Carrie tells The Dorrit if she takes the Hamster back, Carri won’t tell Dad.

Carrie meets Sebastian on a park bench.  Sheez, these kids don’t have a pizza place to meet or something?  

I had your sister steal these for you from Caldor…

Sebastian surprises Carrie with her OWN set of headphones- they listen to the Cars together and then start to kiss.  

Carrie says “As I kissed him, everybody’s opinions of him slipped away.”  Then Carrie asks him where he learned to kiss like that?  Sebastian tells her he had a good teacher.  Carrie is like, YIKES, and runs away.

We cut to Mouse and Carrie in NYC- they are meeting up with Larissa and Seth.

A younger, cuter, less douchey John Mayer

Seth shows up- and he’s cute- not what I expected- and he goes to hug Mouse and she, like, c-blocks him.  They are to meet Larissa at Franklin Furnace to see an art exhibit.  It’s performance art- and the artist is named “Monica Penny.”  Seth comments that she looks familiar… Larissa confirms she is a legendary porn star… that’s why Seth knows her.  Anyway, Larissa explains she has reinvented herself and tonight she will “Take back the vagina.”  If you put a penny in the jar, she will open her “vagina to you.”  Yeah, that’s a REAL re-invention.

Sweeeet Jeeeesus Hellllllllp Meeeeeeee!!!

MisRed
About

Misred is an East Coast Gal and a jack of all trades.  Project Manager, Trained Chef, Amateur Writer, Professional Mocker, Devoted Wife and Mother of Furry Kids (dogs, not werewolves).  I spend my time doing all of the above, as well as making the necessary preparations for my eventual and eternal damnation in the fiery pits of hell.  I take comfort in knowing I'll have friends there... like Satan.

Check out my blog www.meabritapitandanitwit.wordpress.com

9 Comments

  1. 1
    ellemenop
    Posted January 30, 2013 at 5:35 am

    anna sophia robb looks like a 13-year-old model who vogue would have doing age-inappropriate shoots. actually, for all i know, she IS/was a model and i’m too lazy to find out. her face and eyes are very pixie-model-like. anyway, i still think larissa sucks, so i don’t even question why her bad judgment.

    i thought we assumed dad was a lawyer because his friend’s firm gave carrie the internship, but i think i’ve been brainwashed by being married to a lawyer that everyone he knows is from lawschool. which makes me the cross-eyed bored person at many, many places. i really enjoyed when we were first dating and i’d meet his friends who would always ask, “are you an attorney, too?” and my response would be HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH/fall over laughing.

    it would have been awesome if carrie had stumbled upon dorrit’s hamster while snooping through dad’s files at night with a flashlight.

    so i was right at the changing point when high school kids were finally getting their own cellphones — i think i was probably a year behind most kids (my parents were more old-school than my friends’) but i did have a cellphone in 12th grade. i can say i do NOT miss the days when you only had landlines and your annoying siblings could eavesdrop, especially when you COULD TOTALLY TELL they had picked up another phone and were listening to your conversation but they were across the house and wouldn’t answer when you kept telling them to hang up. and my parents refused to get me my own line. now 5-year-olds without cellphones feel abused — they don’t know how hard we had it! (actually, i am glad i’m not a kid now — your parents can stalk your ass via your phone. no thanks! and i know my husband is going to do that to my kid whether i object or not)

    how does one take back a stolen hamster? did carrie expect dorrit to just walk in and say, “hey, i stole this hamster but i’m giving him back?”

    the whole monica penny scene was just … stupid. i could have done without it. couldn’t carrie have found her power somewhere else?

    okay, sooo … if seth is at least a sophomore at princeton (because he was already at princeton when mouse met him, right?), making him 19 or older, isn’t he kind of a loser for having a 16-year-old girlfriend who doesn’t even live in the same state? i mean, from princeton to the NYC suburbs of connecticut, we’re talking at least a 3-hour drive, and there ain’t no midtown direct to take from princeton to penn station so he can then haul his ass to grand central and take metronorth.

  2. 2
    dana d
    Posted January 30, 2013 at 1:06 pm

    “I had your sister steal these for you from Caldor” i almost fell off my chair laughing when i read this…. i thought i was the only person who remembers that store.

  3. 3
    MissKris RTVfan
    Posted January 30, 2013 at 7:39 pm

    I remember Caldor! Isn’t that what Kohl’s is now, basically? Anyway, it’s funny all the correlations you made between this show and 90210…I was thinking while watching that this is what the 90210 reboot should’ve been. I’m kinda learning to like this show, as long as I completely detach in my mind that this is the SJP Carrie. It’s still hard, and also having read the book it’s not following so I have to put that out of my mind too. Once those 2 things are erased, it’s a cute little high school show, good for watching right before going to sleep.

    I do wish they’d follow the book more closely, then eventually this show could evolve into Summer & The City, where we meet Samantha. What fun to see a young Samantha! For those that haven’t read the books I won’t say who ties Samantha to this show ;)

  4. 4
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 8:55 am

    Yeah, most of the Caldors are not Kohls… but Kohls is WAY nicer. Caldor was ghetto.

    @ellemenop- I was 30 when I got a cellphone. hahahaha

  5. 5
    MissKris RTVfan
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 9:09 am

    I know Caldor didn’t become Kohl’s, I mean Kohl’s went in most of Caldor’s old locations. I do love Kohl’s so a good replacement. Yep, Caldor was way ghetto!

  6. 6
    labowner
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 9:10 am

    Does any one think Larissa would be a better “role model” for Samantha or is Larissa playing the role of Samantha or is Mags Samantha since she is having sex with an older man?

    I was waiting to hear Morrisey, not name a hamster after him.

  7. 7
    MissKris RTVfan
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 9:14 am

    I think the point of Larissa is to show how Carrie was eventually drawn to, then remained close friends with, Samantha. I’m going to have to reread the book. I think the show is trying to blend elements of both the books (The Carrie Diaries and Summer & The City).

  8. 8
    ellemenop
    Posted January 31, 2013 at 10:09 am

    @misred — thing is, I actually think kids don’t know what they’re missing by having cellphones. not only can they potentially be parent-stalked via app, but they can harass you and remind you to come home or cut your activities short. I’m sure kids who don’t pick up their parents’ phone calls consistently enough get into enough trouble to learn to pick up. before, you could disappear more easily! but I guess the whole thing is thy they really DON’T know what they’re missing.

  9. 9
    TurtleGirl93 TurtleGirl93
    Posted February 2, 2013 at 8:19 am

    Prediction! That law firm woman/Carrie’s ‘boss’? I think she’s going to turn out to be Miranda’s mom.

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *

*
*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Human Verification: In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.