Frank tells us that he feels like his entire team is pointing their fingers at him, despite Sam’s attempt to work as a team, Zach’s perfectly valid point, and Ashley’s typical silence. Someone get this girl some cow testicles, apparently they’re the only things that make her come alive!
Anyway, Frank has moved on to whining at Marie and Robb. Then he just goes into an apeshit temper tantrum like a toddler who doesn’t want to go potty. He claims that this is the same thing that happened in San Diego, and he doesn’t want them to make him look like a crazy person. Hate to break it to him, but he did that all on his own. This is not merely the case of someone getting a bad edit.
Brooklyn has a team meeting, acting like they can’t decide who to send in. When everyone gathers for the announcement, Devyn informs us that she made a bet with her team- if they won 2 challenges in a row, she would take off her wigs and rock an afro for a day. Not only that, she’s the spokeswoman for the second time in a row!
Just feel obligated to share a picture of bet-losing Devyn, even though I have nothing snarky to say because she still looks adorable.
Anyway, Brooklyn has of course decided to send in Cancun, which is actually fair since they’re the only team who hasn’t gone in so far. And it doesn’t hurt that they and San Diego are the core of the alliance.
Cancun has a team meeting, where CJ has already volunteered himself since he’s bigger and stronger than Derek. Since Jonna is bigger than Jasmine (although they’re both two of the smallest girls in the game), he would like her to go in with him. Jasmine says she doesn’t mind going in, but CJ still thinks Jonna will give them a better chance of winning. Jonna doesn’t want to go home because, as you may remember, she has nowhere to go… even though this breakup apparently happened 2 summers ago, so what has she been doing this whole time? Jonna leaves, saying they can decide whatever they want, and CJ says that’s not a team effort. He tells us that character should come first and money second in this game.
Oh, CJ. That’s adorable. Will you never learn?
Jonna and Zach get all emotional in a closet, as Zach tells us that he’s been given everything for his entire life, so knowing about Jonna’s struggles has taught him a lot. Whatever, this is not what the Challenge is for. Should have had some emotions on the Real World, Zach!
ARENA. Sam will be the female San Diego representative, because apparently she is meaner than Ashley and therefore more qualified to push one of the tiny Cancun girls through a tiny hallway. And the Cancun female rep is Jasmine (who will be volunteering to save her “sister” Jonna), making this even easier. San Diego male is Zach, who is quite possible the actual Hulk (I know everyone calls him Thor, but we all know his true Avenger kindred spirit). Cancun’s male is CJ (AKA Captain America for the purposes of this analogy), who is big and strong but also a mere human. Frank tells us that he’s so happy Zach knew how to “man up” when he had to and do what was right for the team.
“And when we’re thrown into a strategy arena, Zach will have to man up again because <insert bullshit reason here>.” STFUF