The Taste Recap: And so it begins . . .

The Taste

Hola Gasmii and welcome to the recap of the first elimination episode of The Taste!

I am kind of torn about my opinion of the show, but all in all I am really enjoying it.  In that, it seemed to me to go by really quickly and it was pretty fast paced and I enjoyed that.  So let’s get started.

The Teams

TEAM TONYNinamarie the caterer, Diane the Bitch, Mia the Yoga Instructor, and Uno the sake drinking single mom who won Tony over with her organ meat.

 

TEAM LUDOPaul the Ginger Chef, Sarah the foodblogger/pyromaniac (you’ll see later), Gregg the sexy teaspoon, and Shawn the big dude that Diane was mean to (also a chef) 

 

TEAM MALARKEY

Jeff the chef with tattoos, Khristianne the chef to the Stars (Charlie Sheen), Micah the guy who quit his job for this (will it pay off for him?), and Adam the ponytail

 

TEAM NIGELLA:   GIRL POWER!!

Huda the professional cook -(LUDO!), Renatta the home cook with the chicken and the sauce on top, Trailer Park Lauren and Erika the Pink Nightmare.

 And we begin!  This week’s theme is “comfort food.”

The first challenge is the Team Taste Test.  During this challenge, each team member creates a dish with the required ingredients (bacon, egg, cheese) and then the team chooses one dish to go to the guest judge who will blind taste and choose a winner.  Whoever created the winning spoon, gets immunity and the team gets the benefit of that guest judge to guide them during the individual challenge.

Guest Judge:  Gabrielle Hamilton

And we’re off! Tony thinks his ladies are smart and everyone else is a dumbass (I think he’s talking about himself) and Malarkey is going after Ludo. He screams, “We’re coming for you Ludoooooo!”  And it’s so weird, because Malarkey literally can’t move half his face because of all the botox.  Yikes!

This is Malarkey’s  overbotoxed “Game Face.” He’s worse than Real Housewife.

Nigella sweetly encourages her team to cook, but not engage in the hypermasculine hystrionics of Malarkey v. Ludo and just concentrate on cooking.  Then she pulled a hat rack out of her purse.  Or something.

Here we get to see how the chefs interact with the contestants.  Malarkey is super on top of them and tells Micah to ditch his original plan and make a soup instead.  Ludo is SUPER FRENCH and very loud and direct in the kitchen, he even refuses to le high five Sarah the blogger.  “A chef is not your friend in ze kitchen!”   Man, I hate it when a high five is not returned.  Shame!  Also that girl needs to put her hair in a ponytail, I dont care if this is TV, that is UNSANITARY!  Mark my words at some point in this show, the judges will find a long hair in their food.  Watch.

eyediosmio

I'm a part time writer, full time wife and Doberman wrangler in steamy South Florida.  I try to keep my sanity by watching loads of reality tv so I can feel better about myself.  It's a lazy way to maintain my moral compass, but I'm too lazy to drive to church every Sunday. 

11 Comments

  1. 1
    TVKimmy TVKimmy
    Posted February 8, 2013 at 1:37 pm

    I just don’t know. I’ve enjoyed it, but like I said in the minicap, it really threw me for a loop when the broke from the name of the damn show, THE TASTE, to decide final judging. I would have enjoyed your alternative eyediosmio, or if they decided who was going home but didn’t reveal the decision till after they talked to them. Either way, I’m going to give it anotherepisode or two and see how I feel.

    Diane is a complete and total toolbitchdouchenozzlecanoe. Cannot stand her!

  2. 2
    Chelsea
    Posted February 8, 2013 at 4:13 pm

    I absolutely love Kristianne. I loved that she stood up for Michah and told the rest of her team \you are not a good person\ I thought of all of the places tvgasm would have caught the Hills reference.

  3. 3
    Posted February 9, 2013 at 4:46 am

    @Chelsea: I love Khristianne, too! And ESP the way she stood up for Micah.
    It was weird the way ponytail and tattoo Jeff were smirking
    The Hills reference totally escaped me, truth a certain couple burned a hole in my brain where
    My memory of that show should be. Sad face.

    @ TVKimmy: if they do thus show again, they rally should change the format. BUT, truth b told I thought they let the right people go based on their initial tastes/reactions.

    I also have a feeling people are gonna get nasty.

  4. 4
    Derek Hazelton
    Posted February 9, 2013 at 8:05 am

    @eyediosmio, I actually kind of enjoyed this show and I’m glad you’re recapping it, I love your take on things and I plan on watching it until the very bitter end.

  5. 5
    moonshine
    Posted February 9, 2013 at 8:56 am

    I’m not surprised Ludo did not return the high five – no other nationality hi fives, it was something one taught a toddler to do, similar to ‘peek a boo’ but one morphed into an adult behavior whilst the other remained in the nursery. It would be fun to reverse them and have adults peekaboo each other!

  6. 6
    zerocool
    Posted February 9, 2013 at 11:41 am

    I’m liking the show so far; I agree the final elimination goes against the format, but at that point I understand why they’re doing it (so all the judges will still compete as much as possible?).

    Can I tell a little story about kids drinking in Europe? My sister (a teacher here in U.S.) was visiting relatives in Wales; she went to a PTA meeting out of curiousity. They served hard cider to the kids at the meeting. A PTA MEETING – hard cider – unbelievable!!

  7. 7
    Just Ducky
    Posted February 10, 2013 at 8:16 am

    Although I agree that Gregg is easy on the eyes, I think he may be at best a narcissist and at worst the next Ted Bundy?

  8. 8
    Chris Velazquez
    Posted February 10, 2013 at 1:14 pm

    I’ll start off by saying that while I still think Bourdain is a pompous ass, he was actually quite pleasant while guiding his team during the immunity challenge. It surprised me.

    Diane definitely took her loss on Chopped hard, becase he was never even near this level of bitchiness. I get why she’d be upset, the judges told her her dick was absolutely perfect but still eliminated her because she totally forgot a basket ingredient. Still no excuse for breaking the Bitch Meter here.

    The elimination bothered me on many levels. For starters, they broke the show’s premise by knowing who cooked what for elimination. Second, I hate double eliminations on the first day of competition. Third, because they eliminated Renatta for making a dessert. I fucking hate how so many chefs think so slowly of desserts, despite them being staples of a full meal. It reminds me of when Lauren auditioned and the male judges said they weren’t looking for “a dessert cook”. Fuck you, you pisswads! Desserts are just as valid as any other meal, and I respect any non-baker or non-pastry chef who can make a great dessert, because I sure have seen pastry chefs making savory dishes with no problem. Methinks so many chefs are just so scared about making desserts (see so many of them on Top Chef) that they automatically dismiss desserts.

    Seriously, Renatta’s dessert can’t have been bad to get her eliminated, seeing as how Malarkey loved it. Nobody liked Shawn’s dish, he should have gone home. At least one judge loved Renatta’s dish, Shawn’s was pretty unanimous in that it lacked seasoning. Seriously, why would you not kick out the guy who didn’t season his food? It’s cooking 101, the most basic stuff about cooking! Salt and pepper! I’m not a good cook and even I know to season my food and taste it as I cook to adjust it! Man, it pisses me off that they let lack of seasoning slide!

  9. 9
    Posted February 11, 2013 at 7:24 am

    @Chris: I totally agree regarding the dessert issue on these shows, what is more comforting than sugar? SERIOUSLY! Although I wonder if it was the way it was presented on the spoon, or perhaps the flavors weren’t complex enough. I think you can get more complex flavors out of a savory dish than a simple apple crumble, that could have been the issue.

    And Shawn, what a derp. I find lack of salt is always an issue, in restaurants and on these shows. Tsk Tsk! Hopefully he keeps that in mind next time, but on these cooking shows people get in their own way all the time.
    @JustDucky: Gregg is a harmless doof, he really tries too hard. My husband says he seems like the kind of guy to drink too many beers then smash them on his forehead before he passes out on your couch. Ha!

    @Derek: Thanks my friend! HOpefully this show gets a little more amusing, right now it’s kind of cruising.

    @zerocool: My husband’s family is Old World, he tells me they used to give the kids a little sambucca for a tummyache

    @moonshine: Honestly, I can never FATHOM Ludo ever having high fived anyone. And she wanted a high five over something simple. Grrrrrrrl, do not insult the Ludo with your childish antics! Also, she needs to get her head on straight before she burns down the whole building. Yeesh!
    And LOL at the peekaboo, I can see Sarah doing that – hee!

  10. 10
    Pegalicious
    Posted February 11, 2013 at 3:13 pm

    @moonshine, I would LOVE it if adult “peek-a-booed” instead of high-fiving. Makes me giggle to think about it.

    And @eyediosmio, I’m loving your Mary Poppins references for Nigella. I was thinking of unicorns and rainbows, and perhaps Care Bears, but Mary Poppins is much better. Thanks for your great recaps. (BTW, I, too, cry all too easily. Even if I could cook I’d never make it on one of these shows.)

  11. 11
    JimbobJones JimbobJones
    Posted February 11, 2013 at 4:28 pm

    So far, this show has been a bit dull (I’ll ignore the idiotic ending that goes against the whole show concept). Hopefully it’ll pick up, because I really WANT to like it.

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