So here’s an interesting twist, Diane opens up. She starts off by saying that she’s never going backwards and that she was in a dark place due to a divorce ten years ago. She was penniless and at rock bottom, and that is why she has a tough veneer to keep the hurt and pain from getting near her again. Interesting. She even CRIES people! I have to say, I know people like this and have had close friends who were similar.
Whoa, there’s a tear there. Do you think it’s like that creature from Alien, and the tear will land on the floor and sizzle through the linoleum?
So here’s some advice Diane, if you keep that wall up all the time you keep out all of the good stuff, too. And you end up missing out on so much because you are always on the defensive. Plus, being bitchy is no way to make friends. Just saying.
It’s down to the wire, and everyone is scrambling. Gregg is even helping Sarah and her unhygenic hair plate her tacos.
Time’s up! Khristianne does a funny little dance and Mia proclaims “I made the bread bitches!” and Paul is nervous. Of course.
First sandwich up is Ponytail’s, and again he says he’s serving them Cubano. That is so gross, man. That poor Cuban man. (tsk tsk tsk). Also, dumbass should know there is NO JALAPENO on a Cuban sandwich. That’s NOT a Cuban sandwich, and something you made up. Sorry, but in Miami, this is serious business. So is cannibalism.
Ponytail’s cannibal sandwich
The judges are not very impressed, and apparently misidentifying most of the ingredients. He’s middle of the road, no gold star for you Fine Young Cannibal!
Khristianne’s up next and everyone really likes it. Ludo especially likes the apple component and Malarkey Jugghead Playdo-face gives her a point for risk. You all notice how he’s very intense with his notebook? I’d be so happy if it had a unicorn on it.
Khristianne’s sandwich makes he HUNGRY!
Gregg’s dish is up next and as usual he is super, super confident. However, the judges really dislike it. They don’t understand it, they identify the lamb correctly but the flavor is too intense and the bread tastes like a pastry. Gregg is really upset, and everyone is happy to see him squirm.
I would like to say that this is not a sandwich but more like an appetizer at a Chilli’s
Lauren’s up and she reiterates her earlier statement that she made this sandwich just for Tony. He takes one bite and declares he loves it. Everyone agrees, and Ludo comments that this is not the food you eat before kissing someone and Tony says it’s so good he would change his plans just so he could enjoy another bite. Wait, did Ludo just tell us he wants to make out with Tony? Interesting. Canibalism and gay sex in one episode. They need to advertise these shows differently if they want to up the ratings! Lead with that, guys.
Lauren’s Bourdain Seduction