The Voice Recap: Promises, Promises

The Voice

By Pollyanna | Saturday, September 29, 2012 | 10:54 pm | 2 Comments
Posted in: Recaps, The Voice

Hello everyone!  Sorry about my absence – last week was a bit of a disaster and I was out of town for a funeral for most of it.   Anyway, I’m just going to start in on the episodes from Monday and Tuesday.  

For everyone that needed to catch up (obviously me included), Carson fills us in on the current team standings.  Adam and Christina both are at 11, Cee-lo is at 10 and Blake only has 7.  We are filled in, yet again, how the whole thing works.  For those of you that live in a cave, the coaches can’t see the person singing.  Because we are down to the wire, and we just wasted 5 minutes filling people in on what has happened so far, we get right to the first audition.

Meet Michelle Brooks-Thompson.  She is a mom and works at a bank.  Her husband tried to get into the NFL and made the St. Louis Rams only to be released before the first game.  She talks about how the Voice is her ‘St. Louis Rams’ and she needs to prove herself.  Come on, Michelle, that’s all you’ve got?  No childhood illness, no natural disaster?  Not so sad story aside, Michelle heads on to the stage to sing ‘Proud Mary’.  At this point in the show, my kids get excited.  Not because they are fans of Tina Turner.  No, they recognize the song from Just Dance 2 for the Wii.  I tried to explain to my six year old that ‘Just Dance 2′ isn’t the one that made the song and it was actually popular a long time ago.  Ah, the youth of today.  She does a great job singing and Adam and Cee-lo turn around.  At the last minute, Christina turns around.  What in the hell is Christina wearing?  I think she forgot to put pants on with her outfit.  Adam tells Michelle that he would be blessed and honored to be chosen.  Christina was waiting for a flaw, but never found one.  Cee-lo says it was a flawless vocal.  She sees through Cee-lo repeating what Christina said and Christina being kind of bitchy and ends up going with Adam. 

Next up is Diego Val. This is what we were expecting!  Diego got a disease when he was young that disintegrates your hip bone.  After fighting through it, he now goes to hospitals to sing for sick kids.  Take a lesson, Michelle.  Diego is also from Peru and his family doesn’t seem to speak a word of English.  Ah, bueno.  Diego sings ‘Animal’, part of it in Spanish.  Cee-lo is the only one to turn around.   Oh no!  It seems there are going to be twists and turns this season.  Christina comments that she could still snatch him up later.  Adam comments that he was a handsome man, which Christina strongly agrees with.  Keep your non-pants on, Xtina.

Our third contestant is Lauren Brooke.  She grew up with dyslexia.  Shocker – she loves singing.  That kind of is assumed what with you auditioning on a singing show, but whatever.  She sings ‘Cowboy Cassanova’ and I’m sorry, but it was not good.  Nobody turns around and her parents seem really hostile.  When Cee-lo tells her she did a great job, here Dad mutters ‘Then why didn’t you turn around?’  Easy pops, it was because she sucked.  And not in the way that’s going to get you a record contract.

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Pollyanna
About

Pollyanna is your typical midwestern soccer mom, hailing from the great state of Ohio.  When she isn't cheering for her kids, she can be found reading trashy romance novels or watching reality shows that make her feel better about herself.

2 Comments

  1. 1
    Lizbot
    Posted September 30, 2012 at 7:16 am

    Thanks for the recap, Pollyanna. A funeral is a complete acceptable reason to skip a week of recaps, so the fact that you made an effort to catchup is doubly appreciated (unless Flipit has started paying you or something….)

    Why is it that I find Ceelo’s weird self-indulgent pet accessories to be tolerable, and if I admit it to myself, even slightly charming, but I find Christina’s weird self-indulgent cleavage accessory to be down-right obnoxious? I think it wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t have to show them every damn week! But then, the girl is not known for subtlety, in her vocals or in her fashion choices. The sad thing is, she’s not really that old (I say that because she’s younger than me!) but she makes herself appear to be older by desperately trying to clinging to her youth. Much like Madonna. Someone needs to do an intervention on them both.

    And speaking of Christina’s ego, I think she was relieved when Terisa Grifffin (big sassy black lady) wound up picking Blake. I don’t think Christina’s ego could have handled trying to corral that much confidence. She had such a sour face on when Terisa was doing her schtick, like “Bitch! I’m the only diva allowed in here! You should be licking my boots.” I think Blake will have fun with her though — assuming he doesn’t dump her in the battle rounds…although I suspect that he might be too afraid of her to do that!

    I also suspect that the judges get a preview of the singers before the blind auditions. Like maybe they get to watch at least some of the audition tapes and so they may have a clue to who they’re listening to before they turn around. Sometimes it seems as though they all turn around for pretty but mediocre contestants, and then there are other contestants who are obviously amazing but turn out to be big fans of one of the judges (like Jamar from last year) but only get that one judge to turn around for them. And like the Disney chick from this year. She wasn’t amazing, but I find it interesting that Christina was the only one to turn around for her and then called her by name and commented “I’ve been waiting for you”. Of course, it could be that some connection from Disney or the girl herself gave Christina the headsup, but it seems to me like Christina turned for due to the prior connection rather than the girl’s actual talent. In any case, that Christina will hold onto her as long as she can, but she won’t win the audience votes (unless she can drop the bland Disney-style of musical performance, or the voting audience is stacked with tweens and teens who are familiar with her).

  2. 2
    kloewent
    Posted October 1, 2012 at 2:02 pm

    Did anyone catch the look from Blake when Christina said her patronizing “how cute” about the pig farm, it was total “You are a complete asshole thinking there is anything cute about a pig farm!!” What a twit. I bet that guy could do the pig call really good with that high voice!

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