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At least mom has a grip on reality…and the knowledge of who this REALLY is about!
Well, again Toddlers & Tiaras is KILLING US with their nice families and good kids. Seriously, get a shrink on staff and find us hot messes to make fun of! You’re going to ruin my reputation for disliking kids and pageant freaks!
This episode brings us a really cool pageant idea – meaning no animals! – America’s Genuine Jewel Pageant: All Around the World – showcasing other cultures! Wee! That is actually a really cool idea, especially where all the girls get to pick a country and dress in their culture. Kids are actually learning something at this pageant. T&T YOU ARE KILLING ME HERE!
So first up is Lacey-Mae, 8, which is an unfortunate name but she can shorten it to Lacey when she gets her master’s degree and begins taking over the world. At first, I thought Lacey-Mae was the wife on Little People, but it just turns out she’s a little person herself! In addition, she has a nice family and a super-supporting and loving mother. Crap. Lacey-Mae does have trouble with the dresses they buy (used, because they are a smart family)…they often don’t fit her body type and have to get them altered. But Lacey-Mae kicks some serious ass in her Around the World wear and her Outfit of Choice (which was unbelievably cool and spooky at the same time) and she has a lot of stage presence. Love it.
Next up is the SUPER-UNFORTUNATELY NAMED Damitri’ana, 8, who is beautiful, talented and because of her name, slated to become a receptionist at some low-rent nail salon. Thanks, MOM. She is very confident when practicing at home and her mom and aunt have a healthy (sort of) competition going on whose routine is better – the African one or the Michael Jackson one. Because an homage to a pedophile at a little girls’ pageant is really a smooth move. Onstage, she’s less confident during her beauty walk, which surprised me, but she did a great job in the other two categories.
And finally, we meet Mackenzie, 4 – not the NiNi one like I had hoped (I didn’t’ see a commercial for it, only read it on the DVR description) – who normally does natural pageants. We know that means instant death for most kids (unless they are on Eden’s World where the pageant is fixed so the kid they are helping wins EVERY TIME), but Mackenzie and her family are pretty humble about it and just hope to do well. Oh, and she does! That kid kicks ass for a first-time-glitzer.
There really isn’t much controversy in this episode, a few funny things said by Damitri’ana’s relatives and some funny faces by kids in the pageant, but perhaps the families are on to us and they fake being weird until they are on camera, then they go all normal on us. Dang!
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