B-man says she put Ptynn in pageants when she was 18 months old but she didn’t start winning until about a year ago when “she started liking it, per se.” And I’m gonna say you’re an idiot, “per se.”
Stickiest kid ever.
“Ptynn can be exhausting at time,” B-man says. And those times are 24/7. B-man tells us Ptynn is a wild child and does what she wants to do when she wants to do it. Uh, B-man, you know it’s your responsibility to make sure you stop her from acting like that, right? I mean, that is my understanding of parenting, that you raise productive human beings who have manners and know how to comport themselves at places like restaurants, stores and their PLACE OF EMPLOYMENT.
“Onstage she’s a different child, she knows what it takes to win,” B-man tells us. Man, I hate those kids…they won’t act properly at home and when they are good onstage, the parents just continue to let the brat-ass behavior continue. Then B-man qualifies what she just said. “IF she wakes up in the right mood.” Ah, jackpot. You know this kid is going to wake up in a terrible mood. Thank you T&T gods.
Then the Ptynn/B-man situation takes a weird turn. B-man points out a picture of Justin Bieber and Ptynn calls him her boyfriend, kissing his picture. I barely hold down the vomit.
Then Ptynn tells us her dog cocks his head and farts, then she holds up a Justin Bieber doll and says, “And then Justin Bieber smells it. And that’s nasty.” You hear laughing off camera and Ptynn looks at everyone says, “What’ll ya’ll laughing about?” I think the crew enjoys the idea of Justin sniffing farts, that’s what.
I may have cropped this a little too tightly, but it works just the same.
Back with Beth, who tells us that Elesha’s biggest competition is herself. Well, it seems like she’s a shoo-in since “herself” sucks balls…and yet, I feel like we’re caught in a conundrum on this one.
Elesha tells us she’s shy at standing in front of people and Beth tells us they are working on overcoming her fears. “The best way to overcome your fear is to confront it,” Beth tells us. So I assume they are going to speech class, dance class, gymnastics…oh no…
They head over to Topsy Exotic Ranch, a drive-through safari with over 50 species from 6 continents, and where Gasmii reader/commenter Christy almost lost her life. So, what the hell does this have to do with confidence building?
Beheaded by a camel!
There are zebras, lots of things with horns, and Beth tells us that Elesha is scared of feeding animals and scared at pageants so she thought by bringing her here, she could build Elesha’s confidence. Yeah, but Elesha doesn’t need pretty feet to feed the camel, does she? Seems like you might want to build her confidence by training her for the pageant. Have you considered spending feeding zoo money on a coach? I mean, we’re still talking about animals who need to be fed here.
Kids, meet your new daddy.
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