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Icon Wear! This category was a hot mess because I don’t think people really understood what this meant. There were a lot of costumes that just weren’t icon-ish at all.
Judge Porky says the girls are really going to need to wow them with the routines so they remember them. “You’re going to have to be AN ICON. Something we won’t forget.” How about forgetting that hat the next time you get dressed?
Snausage is about to do her Beyoncé routine and dad is thrilled, he truly does love his daughter. Not enough to care about her health, but you know, loves her like you’d love a bratwurst at a summer grill-out.
But halfway through, the skirt gets caught, probably on her back chubb, and she just stands there. Sabrina keeps trying to tell her to take off the skirt but she doesn’t listen, so Sabrina goes apeshit on her son and he does it, but then she blames him later for messing up. Poor Snausage – her little thunderthighs did the best they could!
Next is little Phoebe Pompeo who sings that the umbrella is her favorite. I agree, it’s very gauzy and sparkly and damn if I don’t need one now. Mackenzie gets onstage and totally turns it on. She does a great job, has a lot of energy and enthusiasm, but I’ll be damned if I know what icon she was. I thought she was going to do Singing in the Rain, but nope.
Faith-LYNN is doing I Dream of Jeannie and they just KNOW she is the only one doing that because it’s old-fashioned. So old-fashioned that when she gets in line, the girl in front of her has the exact same ICON in mind, but with a much better Jeanie headdress in my opinion.
Coach Cooch interviews that Faith-LYNN’s outfits are always, “very original” (like “very” unique?) and “she always stands out.” She sure stood out when she got in line behind someone JUST AS ORIGINAL as she was.
Coach Cooch almost shits herself silly and she spends the next few minutes shooting daggers at the other Jeanie. Sucks to be you, Cooch.
So the first Jeanie gets up and honestly, her routine seemed really boring and basic. Bummer, I was hoping she’d smoke Faith-LYNN. No such luck.