Finally, in Williamsburg, Kentucky, 3 year old Jozy slams her bedroom door right on the camera operator. Nice kid. Mom Charlotte continues the disciplining of the episode by immediately grabbing her kid, telling her she has to go to time out when she’s a bad girl, and actually puts her into time out. Finally!
If looks could kill, she’d be in time out for a loooong time.
“My daughter Jozy is a hot mess and lives in time out,” she tells us. Sounds like it might not be working like it should. Jozy whines, “Awww man! I’m never gonna go to the store.” Then Charlotte makes Jozy pinky promise to be good and clearly pinky promises mean nothing in this home.
Oh and “Jozy”? Way to make sure she ends up on the pole.
Jozy is asked to practice but instead runs away. She is threatened with the time out chair. Jozy says, “I like to do pageants…because I like to.” She’s actually really pretty and would probably grow on me if she weren’t such a damn hellion. Her mom picks up a sash and she throws a fit because it’s not time to play with them. There is “sash-playing” time? Man, I was robbed as a kid. Sashes are so much fun!
Charlotte tells us they have been doing natural beauty pageants for three years which can only mean one thing: The amateurs are going to tell us that Jozy has a great chance to win ultimate grand supreme. “We’re out of our league, but we’re excited to try it,” Charlotte tells us. Come on, don’t deny us! Don’t!
Charlotte teases Jozy (good move) and says she’s going to put on the pretty crown and Jozy says, “Mommy don’t! They’re all junk!” Don’t you EVER trash on sparkly crowns like that again! Get your ass in the time out chair for the rest of the week!
Charlotte tells her they’re not junk and the truth comes out. “Daddy says they’re all junk,” she says. Great, dad! Way to tell your daughter that her awards are junk. I’m sure as she gets older that will make her feel great. Charlotte tries to save it by saying that her dad didn’t say they were junk, but we can all rest assured that he did.
Time outs really suck! Why am I always in one?
Then Jozy starts chirping this really annoying high-pitched noise while Charlotte says, “Jozy Rae,” and I’m guessing that is how Rae is spelled unless it’s something like Rai or Raye or TXra or something. “You don’t act ugly and you know that,” she says, but it’s clear that Jozy Zraie doesn’t know it because clearly the time out chair is really just a chair.
“Time out is ba-ad,” she says, making bad two syllables and two different accents. She cries in the chair.
Dad Dennis tells us that he’s a hardcore pageant dad (oh yeah? Do YOU have a Jozy neck tattoo?) and that his Play Station network screen name is Pageant Dad. Way to keep your man card, dude.
Now look who’s in a time out.
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