Jonel tells us that not only will kids get the requisite crown, trophy, sash, bond they will never use, but also a “legitimate contract with a fabulous talent agency.” If they were that fabulous, you shouldn’t have to point out that the contract is legit, legit, too legit to quit.
Butt glue rules!
So pageant day gets started with Kelsey being her usual sleepy self…honestly, what is wrong with that kid? She is sleeping through hair and makeup and her interviews. Jillian says Kelsey is just a little tired but she hopes she wakes up. How about shoving a few espressos down her Pixie hole?
Me, most mornings.
Casey isn’t stressed but Melissa is freaking out. Mia is freaking out because her toes hurt, she hates the hair clip and her flipper is going nuts. The flipper just isn’t fitting correctly because ONCE AGAIN, waiting until the day of the pageant is the perfect time to see if something fits your kid.
Me, the first hour of work.
Kelsey is wearing the ugliest face and she is totally Oscar the Grouch right before she goes onstage.
Me, the last hour of work. I really am a joy in the office.
There is no explanation as to why Kelsey is so tired, but luckily she pulls it together onstage. She smiles, walks beautifully, makes eye contact and looks amazing. How do I bottle what just happened and use it on Monday mornings? Because wow, that was an amazing transformation. And kind of spooky.
Looks like the shot of adrenaline directly into her heart worked wonders!
Mia is up next and she will not keep her hands out of her mouth, trying to push the flipper up. Well, sure enough, she goes onstage and looks cute but pushes the flipper up not once, not twice, but looks like 5 times.
Melissa rolls her eyes and says her score goes down every time she does that. Wah-wahhhh.
I had another word in mind….
Melissa keeps asking Casey if she’s nervous and woman, SHE’S NOT! Kid has enough confidence for all of us. Stop trying to push your own issues onto your kid.
And is this your pet chihuahua?
Casey is waaay too bouncy onstage but she did better than I thought she would. She is really pretty, enthusiastic and she’s got it. But the bounciness is going to come back to get her and one of the judges says she did have “a little too much personality” for beauty and she was not “overly impressed.” I’d call her racist, but the judge is black too. Bummer for the recapper.
I own this because I worked hard and I actually love pageants!