“Do you know any other kid that has an $8,000 dress?” Kelly asks. Probably Beyonce’s daughter…Mariah Carey’s daughter…Will Smith’s daughter…the REAL Jennifer Lopez’s daughter…Trump’s daughters…oh, and anyone who ever got married, especially if they appeared on Say Yes to the $8,000 Dress. So to answer your question, yes.
Detail of the $8,000 dress…uh, I think Beth could have made a nicer dress…and she HAS!
“My daughter has an $8,000 dress, so for me to expect her to ask her to give it her best, I don’t think is asking too much. Four years old is not too soon to learn that,” Kelly says. First of all, let’s remember this for later. Second, only ONE of her daughters has the dress? Which one, I wonder? The personality-less one or the firecracker? If only Jamie Sterling were here to help the decision!
Oh my God, does anyone really give a shit about high-fructose corn syrup? I mean, has anyone out there gone out for girls’ night and had a conversation about this? Or Yaz, for that matter? No. Stupid Corn Syrup Lobbyist…please stop these insipid commercials.
Back in Conway, Chante and Kali are at the pet store where LEASHED pets are welcome. LEASHED. So Buster is completely off-leash (meaning he is now unwelcome) and while they are looking for low-fat treats for him (how about no treats if he’s overweight?), he poops on the floor. They stand around discussing it for a few instead of just getting a bag and picking it up.
You are asking the dog what that is? It is POOP, lady, POOP! Even the dog knows it. And he knows you’ll be cleaning it up, too.
Kali says she’s afraid Buster is going to poop onstage during her talent. That would be hilarious! I think her bigger concern should be that he jumps off the stage and attacks the judges. Which would be double-hilarious! But probably not a winning strategy.
“I don’t clean poop because it’s nasty,” Kali says. That is totally why I don’t have kids!
Chante says, “Kali is going to get onstage and do absolutely wonderful, no questions axed.” Why would you axe a question? What did it ever do to you? “But Buster better not poop onstage.” OMG, please let Buster poop onstage!
Back with the twins, Aly is pushing a baby carriage with the lamb in it and the lamb jumps out and takes off. Good one! Gia is crying because she wants to practice with the baby sheep. Unfortunately, her parents like her less than Aly, so she gets Tom the Turkey.
Sure, it’s all fun and games until late November…
Dad Ron, who is pretty cool and clearly a doting dad, says, “They are four year olds and they are going to pretty much do what they want to do.” Isn’t that where you come in as a disciplinarian? However I can’t hate on Ron…as a commenter reminded us, this family was on Monster-in-Law and he offered his bitch-ass mother-in-law $100,000 to go away and never come back. She was a toootal cooch – he had done a ton of stuff for her (built her a house, paid off some debts I think…it was A LOT) and not only did she never thank him, she was resentful and treated him like shit…I really admired the way he refrained from killing her, because I would have. With a golf club. And then I would have gone out for pizza and beer without washing my hands, she was just that big of a bitch. So Ron, my hat’s off to you.
“Adding a turkey and sheep to the mix…I think Kelly better take some medication before this trip,” Ron jokes as we see Kelly comforting I’m guessing Gia about the turkey. Aww.
Karley is at Katie’s Kuties to practice with her snake and Katie is shitting her bloomers. She really needs to chill, the snake isn’t even near her. Karley practices and Katie says she is a little distracted by the snake, so her routine is a little off. She’d better pull it together before the pageant.
Damn, that thing IS kinda cuddly!