Mackenzie sort of slurs that she’s been competing in pageants since she was six weeks old. Man I hate those kind of mothers – like you don’t have enough to do with a newborn, let’s put them under bright lights and keep them up all day so regional people can tell you your kid is pretty.
You are adorable and smart, so no worries…the concern should be the fact they have to caption a 10-year old native English speaker.
Also, not sure what Mackenzie’s issue is with pronunciation, but I’m guessing it’s either her teeth or she has one of those palate separators or whatever they are called on the roof of her mouth. I’ve heard they are terribly painful – they have a little key and you have to put the key in and “click” it a certain number of times to gradually have your mouth widen. As someone who spent almost 7 years in braces, headgear, retainers with oral surgeries galore, I feel for this kid. And as someone with just as irritating a little brother growing up, I would totally be her alibi should something large and heavy fall on his head.
Christian says he was born in a pageant and Mackenzie corrects him, “AT a pageant, actually.” Then Loni tells us the horrible truth: Mackenzie was competing at a national pageant, went diva and kicked her mother in the stomach/uterus CAUSING HER MOTHER TO GO INTO LABOR. Loni went into labor, had Christian, and – no really – WENT BACK TO THE PAGEANT FOR CROWNING. “Any mom who can do that…is pretty hard-core.” No, she’s stupid bitch who doesn’t have a clue about parenting.
People, honestly, WHO DOES THIS? Even if she were close to home (she says “national pageant,” but I think we all know that those occur at the local middle schools when necessary). You were able to check into a hospital, have a baby and check out the same day? I mean, I realize your HMO probably made you employee of the month, but Jesus, you are asking a lot of your body and of a newborn – unless you left him there to be babysat until the pageant was over? Actually, maybe she just popped him out in the front seat of an ATV. WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!
Loni tells us that Christian is her baby and it’s pretty obvious he’s her favorite. Been there too, Mackenzie! Mackenzie says that she gets a little jealous of Christian and that he wins because he looks cuter than her. That won’t last forever, just most of your formative years. Then you can become super-successful and rub it in his face. Karma really does work out, Mac, just be patient!
Loni says it’s harder for Mackenzie to win crowns than Christian who doesn’t have to work as hard or practice as much. Again, let’s hold this thought, but let’s also discuss the whole girl vs. boy thing. She has to do hair, makeup, nails, flippers and what does he have to do? Wake up from a nap and throw a suit on! And how much competition do boys have in pageants? Sometimes he might be the only one, so DUH, of course he’s going to win more often. Someone kick Loni in the biscuit for me.
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