Tonight’s Top 10 Shows: Tuesday January 8

Tuesday January 8

“Greatest mind on the planet.  People say we shouldn’t have a go at Stephen Hawking, he’s a genius.  He’s not a genius, he’s pretentious.  Born in Oxford, and talks with that fake American accent.” – Stephen Hawking (January 8, 1942; age 71)

Betty White’s Off Their Rockers (8PM, NBC; 2 episodes)  Psy teaches Betty and her pranksters how to dance Gangnam style.

Alright, who paused PSY’s 15 minute shot clock.  That shit should’ve run out by now.

Pretty Little Liars (8PM, ABC Family)  Mona receives a clean bill of health; Aria, Emily, Hanna and Spencer all have different views on Mona’s return to school.

They all debate if chlamydia is truly curable.

Dance Moms (9PM, Lifetime)  The mothers stage a protest and walk out on Abby; Abby quickly assembles a new dance team for a competition.

This is America.  There’s more people willing to whore themselves out on television than Africans infected with AIDS.

The Real Housewives of Miami (9PM, Bravo)  Never-before-seen footage, including Adriana’s acting gig and Lea’s relationship with her housekeeper.

I have a feeling that relationship would be the real life Lucille and Lupe from Arrested Development.

The Sisterhood (9PM, TLC)  Tara starts to plan her son’s Bar Mitzvah.

Can you still consider it meeting your first black Jew if you only saw them on the television?

Cougar Town (10PM, TBS; Premiere)  Grayson doesn’t learn the rules of marriage in his first week with Jules

TBS needs to change their motto from “We Know Funny” to “Why Let Sleeping Dogs Lie?”…

Snooki and JWOWW (10PM, MTV)  Snooki has a baby shower.

…That is if MTV doesn’t trademark it first.

America’s Supernanny (10PM, Lifetime)  Deborah sets out to help a single mother who has relinquished parenting duties to her own parents with disastrous results. 

 Is one of her parents Joe Jackson?

The Joe Schmo Show (10PM, Spike)  One man is brought onto a fake reality show thinking he’ll become a real bounty hunter.

Someone will be murdered by the end of this show.  But seriously, remember when shows were cancelled and stayed cancelled.

Justified (10PM, FX)  Raylan finds evidence his family is at the center of a legendary unsolved mystery while running down a vicious fugitive.

Isn’t that the plot of National Treasure 2?

Did I miss your favorite show? Tell me what you’re watching in the comments below. Want my opinions on not just TV. To follow my personal tweets, click here.

For the fresh recap alerts and to talk trash with us, follow us on Twitter. If you want to play games and socialize, like our Facebook page! We’re also now on Pinterest and Tumblr! Thanks for being a part of the gasm!