Wednesday, May 9
The first recorded mention of the puppet who would go on to be known as Mr. Punch occurred on this date in 1662. Punch and Judy make domestic violence look fun!
Wednesday Night Comedy Block (ABC 8pm – 10pm) The Middle, Suburgatory, Modern Family, Don’t trust the B—- in Apartment 23.
Not having watched any of these, I don’t know if they’re actually funny. But ABC claims they are, so there ya go.
Survivor: One World (CBS 8pm) A castaway betrays an alliance; a tribe member makes up a story to gain the upper hand.
Another dead grandma?
American Idol (Fox 8pm) The finalists perform for the judges.
Another two hour episode with only four contestants. However, the end is in sight! Hooray!
America’s Next Top Model (The CW 9pm) The models must learn a fight sequence and act in a scene with Nicholas Tse; the models brave extreme wind and rain as they pose atop a high-rise.
The only movie Nicholas Tse has been in that I have heard of is The Medallion, in which he played a waiter. But he is pretty to look at.
Ghost Hunters (SyFy 9pm) The team revisits Grant’s favorite location, Mt. Washington, New Hampshire hoping to make contact with the princess.
So I Googled “ghost hunter princess,” as I know nothing about this show, and the first link took me to the satirical website christwire.org. It is hilarious, except for the part where you know some people are actually taking it seriously and probably using it to support some of their own wacky notions.
“A national media sensation, ChristWire.org takes righteousness beyond the bounds of reason. You can’t argue the truth. If God didn’t send tornadoes to warn blacks about rap music, who did? If your husband isn’t a closet gay, he must secretly be Chinese. Don’t send your son to college unless you want to expose him to the dangers of vajazzling. This is no joke, folks. ChristWire is here to save the world from falling into the hands of sanity.”
Revenge (ABC 10pm) Back in 2002, Amanda Clarke starts reading her father’s journals and begins staking out the Grayson’s home; as her anger and determination grow, she forms a plan to seek justice — as Emily Thorne.
Oh goody, a flashback episode!
CSI (CBS 10pm) Finale: When three dead bodies turn up a few blocks from a campaign dinner, the team makes a shocking discovery.
If I had a nickel for every shocking discovery they’ve made over the past 4,000 seasons, I could buy a new car. Renewal status: Renewed, naturally.
Law and Order: SVU (NBC 10pm) Detective Tutuola’s future son-in-law becomes the latest victim in a series of hate crimes against gay men; the squad searches for a connection when a school teacher (Tony Hale) is attacked in a similar fashion.
They’re not hate crimes, guys! It’s just a group of concerned citizens trying to reduce the frequency and severity of hurricanes!
Toddlers & Tiaras (TLC 10pm) Karley, Kali and twins Alycesaundra and Giavanna bring their pets to compete at the Me and My Pet Pageant.
What is wrong with people? Speaking of horrible names, check this link out.
Couple’s Therapy (VH1 10pm) Finale: Dr. Jenn and the staff try to help the couples resolve their issues once and for all.
Recommending that they develop actual useful life skills and stop trying to get on TV at every possible opportunity is where I would start. Renewal status: I have no idea.
What will you be watching tonight?
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