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Hahaha, that would be an impossible challenge for two of these three! No, instead, Scar starts talking about how they are currently standing in the middle of the Alaska Hella-Mush Dogsled Camp (which sounds disgusting) and that these men and women (and doggies) are training for the very important Iditarod race. Daddy Tom says the stuff they have been eating in this camp is “not really gourmet”, which is perfect, because neither is the food made by these chefs. Their challenge is to make a dish in 30 minutes using ingrediences found “only in the camp”…
wow, so I guess that 7-Eleven in the strip mall behind them is off-limits?
Lamest. QuickFire. Challenge. EVER! And it’s actually even lamer than that… I mean, besides the fact that there is nowhere to get food other than in the camp, they made it sound like they would have to search through random tents in order to find it, but instead…
it’s all conveniently located in these coolers right outside this pantry tent
Scar informs them that this is the last QuickFire Challenge before the Finale, so they need to “make it count”. This statement is really the lame de grâce of the challenge, but we’ll come to that in a few minutes. First we get to watch McBitchyson bite it in the snow on the way to the coolers, then Stoner Sheldon reminds us for the 84,937th time that he is from Hawaii, so that’s why he’s such a klutz. For his part, StacheBear seems to think the tiny kitchen with its all-gas stoves is the real challenge, possibly because his chubby ass keeps knocking things over, like utensils, pots and pans, and the other two chefs.
McBitchyson has grabbed some halibut that she plans to serve with a warm vinaigrette of beets and red currant jelly. When she finds out that Stoner is also making halibut, she gets (semi)fake-pissed and snarls “Stop copying me!”. She doesn’t have to worry about that with StacheBear, because he calls out “I’m doing breakfast!” Cue the sound of millions of people not being shocked at all. McBitchy giggles at this and asks “Seriously?”…
and gee, what’s that salty-looking reddish-pink meat-like substance in the tray in front of him?
“Why not?” is his defiant reply. McBitchyson interviews that breakfast seems to be about the only thing that Stachey knows how to cook…
um, are you new here?
Yes, StacheBear defensively tells us that he is making a corn-cake with eggs and some smoked salmon. Really, Stachey? That’s all you’re putting into that dish? There are no other components?…
no, and why do you keep asking me that?