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Hater-Tots has been a hard one to figure out. While he has yet to really live up to his nickname (which, if y’all remember, is mostly self-imposed, and has been a source of major disappointment this season) I get the distinct feeling that he is hyper-aware of the cameras and is carefully crafting a kinder, gentler Hater-Tot on purpose. I also suspect that it may not be a genuine representation of his true personality. I dunno about you guys, but I’m not really buying his over-solicitous “Thank you for agreeing to be partnered with me”s that he’s been tossing McBitchyson’s way.
Over at StonerStache, they have selected Ms. Tempura Tantrum, so of course Stoner gets to make tempura in the form of a fried dessert, which they will be serving with a bunch of different dipping sauces. Curiously, Even though StacheBear had previously professed complete confidence in Sheldon’s innate ability to fry battered things in oil, he seems a little taken aback that Stoner’s batter isn’t blended better. Stoner assures him that real tempura batter is like pancakes, it’s supposed to be “clumpy as fuck”…
shut it, you hairy-ass malihini, I got dis
Finally we come to the Icky Couple, Team ThumbyModel. Stefan is busy denigrating Team MoleyBorden’s stuffed jalapeño dish, reminding us all that the girls didn’t want any “pedestrian bullshit food”. So what’s his and Top Model’s big idea? To serve a chicken “inside out”, with corn purée, eggs, chicken liver, and a “nest” made out of phyllo dough. He’s claiming that it’s “shredded” in honor of their girl Eddie Shredder, but I’m going to call bullshit and guess that they already had the idea for this dish, and have just hammered it into the challenge regardless of what their inspiration was supposed to be…
nice try, but a purée is not the same as shredded
The only thing “shredded” is that silly pair of 90′s mom jeans he keeps wearing. You know, I feel like I should point out that ThumbyHead has also been a major source of disappointment this season, I thought for sure he was going to blaze in there and be a giant badass and blow everybody away with his awesome skills, but so far he’s managed zero wins and been in the bottom just as much as the top, so I feel both cheated and annoyed by his constant line of heavily-accented bullshit.
And speaking of bullshit, there appears to be trouble brewing over on Team Blows-A-Lot, as Blowsie tells us the rice in their dish needs more seasoning and doesn’t have the texture that she envisioned (you will note, she did not say “we”, only “she”). As usual, knowing this ahead of time, I have to wonder why she didn’t speak up (usually not a problem for her) unless she’s so grateful that Sir Barts-a-lot agreed to cook with her that she doesn’t want to risk alienating him, too.