Top Chef Recap: Ginchiest Grub Ever

19 Comments

1. 1
   CrazyTrain
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 10:02 am

   What is with the huge ads on the sides? Makes it difficult to read the site.

2. 2
   Coopcal
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 10:34 am

   Hilarious as always! Thank you for taking the time to do this. You rock. My mom simmered all can vegetables with sugar and bacon grease. It took awhile for me to realize that cooked vegetables shouldn’t have a reside of grease on them and taste oddly sweet.

3. 3
   sheesh
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 10:59 am

   “fried, died, and laid to the side.”
   Hahahahahahahaha…

4. 4
   JimbobJones
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 11:24 am

   “are they gay? or just hipsters? you decide”

   Since I kind of want to punch them both in the head, they’re likely hipsters.

5. 5
   JimbobJones
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 11:30 am

   Holy crap, J-Mo! Is that a Hulk Hogan Boppin’ Buddy behind you in that picture? No wonder you never seem angry. After watching UniBall for an hour, you just take out your irritation on beating the hell out of the Hulkster.

6. 6
   CrazyTrain
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 11:41 am

   And thank you for recapping LCK.. I always forget to watch it! I hope Grunge goes all the way, but we all know that isn’t going to happen.

7. 7
   kloewent
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 12:34 pm

   What is up with those adds? You have to scroll the screen vertically to read each page. Can we close them somehow?

8. 8
   crankyguy
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 1:42 pm

   “and everything looked sorta barfed-on?”

   What it really looks like is a puddle of barf contained within the confines of a large, soft turd formed in a circle.

9. 9
   lestermaddox
   Posted December 6, 2012 at 4:27 pm

   I don’t remember CJ as being so hideously unpleasant and arrogant during his season, and I can’t figure out why he is this season since most of what he has made so far seems to be really bad.

   Who is the guy with the mustache who can’t make French onion soup? For some reason, I want to call him Kevin. Anywho – FOS should not be gelled nor does the cheese go on top of the bread before service, a slice of it goes over the entire bowl and then goes under the broiler until it is all melty and gooey. Expediting might explain a temperature issue with the soup, but it doesn’t explain the obvious fail of the actual dish.

   Personally I hate challenges like this where some of the Chefs have actual dishes to make and some of them get stuck with things like a vegetable medley or onion rings and mushrooms. It seems to me that it would be pretty hard to judge a bowl of mushrooms vs an actual entree, so good on the judges for allowing a well cooked side dish to take home the prize.

10. 10
    lestermaddox
    Posted December 6, 2012 at 4:28 pm

    And I agree about the obnoxiously large ad on the left side of the page. Why is it there, and is there a way to minimize it since it makes reading the site difficult.

11. 11
    badgerfreak
    Posted December 6, 2012 at 6:08 pm

    As much as I hate to side with HaterTots, Stachebear had no real reason to go after him in judging like the did, other than his personal distaste for the man.
    I agree that I think it was garbage that the people who had items to be cooked on the grill, couldn’t be in there to do it themselves. Then again, as she showed in LCK, she couldn’t do it even when she had the time and the space. Ah well. At least the kitchen will be quieter.
    It seemed like the dishes weren’t really fairly distributed. Stephan just kind of pointed and assigned. Did they even get to pick?
    I have to stand alone as finding CJ not super arrogant. I’ll call it a little over confident, but I still like him. I know I’m by myself though, and that’s fine.
    Can we get rid of Blowsie just on principle? She bugs me just by looking at her face and hearing her laugh.

12. 12
    chaosbutterfly
    Posted December 6, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    @badgerfreak, you (unlike CJ’s testicle) are not alone. I stand with you in your non-hate of CJ. Maybe it’s just leftover love from his season or maybe it’s because his douchiness is focused on an appropriate target, but he doesn’t bother me either. He should learn to save the gloating until after he actually wins something.

    Naomi is still as annoying as she’s ever been. Ugh, hate her.

    I liked the taller Canliss brother, even though he was like Eeyore when they came in right after the quickfire. He looked all kinds of despondent and morose, like he wanted to go home and lay under his blankets.
    The shorter one with the blue eyes was a little annoying, but not too bad.
    Daddy Tom also wasn’t openly mocking them at the table, so they can’t be terrible guys.

    I was hoping that we could skip LCK this season and just be normal, but I guess not.
    I’m happy for Kuniko for winning her round, being that she is my favorite of the eliminated chefs and I didn’t agree with her ousting in the first place, but I doubt she’ll make it to the end. She has the talent to do it, I think, but unless her time management and ability to coordinate herself in the kitchen has improved, she can’t hope to win.

    Why do I find Hugh Acherson so attractive?
    I don’t understand this.

    David is so cute….I like his little feet.

13. 13
    2muchbravo
    Posted December 6, 2012 at 9:40 pm

    Top job J-Mo! I’ve got my mom’s well used Betty Crocker cookbook. It’s dog eared and taped together. The recipes have lots of butter and full fat milk. The little pictures show the women in dresses and aprons and men in suits like June and Ward Cleaver.

    I think Hugh is sexy too. You know, in that one brow slightly caustic way.
    I thought the exact same thing about Carla’s jewelry when I saw her slam her wrist down on that squab. Ewww.

    I don’t see all the ads you guys are talking about. There’s one in the middle of the page and the annoying spambot box down below but nothing to the left. Maybe it’s the browser you’re using?

14. 14
    Philo
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 6:23 am

    I thought Mouthy slashed her hand to where she couldn’t operate a kindle. Now she is smashing squab with her bare hands? Not sad to see her go, too annoying. Great recap as always…

15. 15
    ChaCha
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 7:20 am

    My mom WORSHIPPED at the altar of Betty Crocker, and was afraid to veer even in the slightest from Betty’s bible, er, cookbook recipes. After my mom died, my dad was giving me everything of hers that he could and that included THE cookbook. I left it with my dad. No way was I going to extend my childhood culinary adventures with Betty!

16. 16
    vallegirl
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 2:32 pm

    Objectively speaking Hugh’s quite handsome, even with his unibrow. He’s also pretty funny which goes a long way toward making someone attractive AND he’s not afraid to rock a pair of white bucks.

    But I found CJ smarmy and full of himself in season 3, except then he was Dale’s “friend” and shit-talked Hung so he was a “good guy.” So to me he hasn’t changed one bit. It’s just more apparent that he’s always been a douchebag.

17. 17
    roger
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    when i hear the name \bart vandaele\ all i can think about is george costanza always wanting to be an architect.

    the screen ad i saw yesterday made the site nearly impossible to read; today it’s gone. yeah!

18. 18
    Detinha
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 3:25 pm

    Great MoCap, J! You make me laugh so much! Thank you!

    Another side dish is the winner, I see. They don’t make Top Chefs like they used to! This is starting to look like Gordon’s shows with the RAWR meat (h/t to BlueCanary!)

    I think the brothers are Frazier and Niles Crane! LOL

19. 19
    crazy rooster
    Posted December 7, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    Does anyone remember that place the ground patti? It reminds me of the 70s. I was too young to go but it seemed so glamorous with the fire pit in the middle. That reminds me of this episode. Love u jmo