Trailer Trash: This week in Theaters 02/01/13

Hey hey Gasmii!  TheMiki here, checking out what’s coming to a theater near you this weekend.  Spoiler alert: It’s all gonna suck.

Warm Bodies

This year’s entry for Ultimate Valentines Day Compromise Movie looks way more promising than last year’s abysmal Rom-Com-Action abortion This Means War.  I understand that the whole niche market for Rom-Coms that don’t make dudes want to chew their own faces off is a largely untapped cash mine, but this looks mediocre at best.  Malcovich is in it, and he used to mean quality, but then he did Transformers 3… A movie so bad that Megan Fox looked at the script and said, “I’ll pass.”  Actually, someone probably had to read the script to her (or at least help her sound out the words), but the point is that Malcovich is all tainted by Michael Bay and will probably explode for no reason half-way through the movie.  Looks like Sean of the Dead for the tween market.

TheMiki Attendance Likelihood: I’d sit through it if someone else paid and I got to bring a flask of vodka to pour into my $7.00 Big Gulp of Lemonade.