Well, this was a short, relatively uncomplicated episode. It happened to make for mediocre tv, but it’s great for me as a recapper! Heigh ho!
Russell Hunt/Boring Politics
At the end of last week’s episode, millions (dozens?) of Alsookie Stackheaux shippers were thrilled as the two FINALLY appeared to be getting it on. This week, we get about ten more seconds of tongue twisting and a great ab shot before Sookie voms right on Alcide’s feet.
I hope he was still wearing shoes. To his credit, Alcide looks more surprised and concerned than mad or disappointed, and he stays sweet to Sookie throughout the episode. I guess when your werewolf traditions involve eating each others dead bodies, it’s hard to get grossed out.
Just to ruin the moment a little more, Bill and Eric appear in the doorway, clearly pleased. I guess they were going to interrupt the pair either way. At least Sookie ruined it first, or I think both she and Alcide would have been waaay more pissed.
Bill and Eric are there (supposedly) for Sookie’s help: they want her to ‘unglamor’ Alcide’s employee, Doug, who must know how Russell got out. Sookie’s more than a tad frustrated with the never-ending cycle of supernatural threats: “A 3,000 year old vampire wants to suck my blood. Must be Thursday!” Sookie goes into Doug’s mind through the glamour, and sees that a woman with an authority pendant dug up Russell. So.. Nora or Salome, or the woman on the panel?
Speaking of Nora, she’s still alive (as far as vamps go) and is praying furiously in her cell.
I don’t know why she isn’t dead yet, already having given up Traitor Child Vamp, who went kersplat last week.
The Authority minions are watching Eric and Bill’s movements, and to them it seems the boys are just eating coffee and donuts and hitting on Sookie. Frustrated with the lack of progress, Salome resets the clock: they have until dawn. to find Russell.
The Guardian, meanwhile, is mourning Traitor Boy Vamp, who was supposed to be his bro for eternal life. He’s also looking into a mysterious vial of blood, purported to be Lilith’s.
Anyway, the lady who stole Russell made Doug carry him to his new location, creepy old hospital. (Why? It’s not like vamps need help carrying anything. Best guess: cute outfit and she didn’t want to get Russell’s pus-y face on it.)
looks like something from the back of my fridge.
Sookie and the boys follow the trail. Bill and Eric have adorable homoerotic aggression (shocking!) about who’s a bigger traitor and such – when they get the call from Mac from Veronica Mars that the I-Stakes are set to activate at dawn. Bigger part for Mac please!
Eric and Bill try, as usual, to claim they are going to be the manly saviors and go find Russell while Sookie waits outside. Yea right. “Don’t you know not to split up in a big creepy asylum with a crazed killer on the loose?” Plus, she has the “microwave fingers.” Sookie pushes her way in.
Inside the hospital, Doug is adorably afraid and making little Are You Afraid of the Dark whimpers. He’s lamenting never going to New York before he dies. (Eric: “New York City smells like pee and the people are rude.”) Sookie follows Doug’s mind-path-thing, and they come upon a cute little rattie chewing on a human hand.
OM NOM NOM!
Behind some Halloween decorations, they find a pile of dead bodies, one of whom I believe is the spawn of Kevin Sorbo and John Hamm.
Doug runs off in fear and finds a bunch of people in straightjackets waiting to be eaten by Russell. They don’t release them.. but I hope they do, cause that’s actually really scary.
Lafayette sees his demon face in the mirror and starts praying.. when all his little prayer figurines start moving and talking to him.
wall o’ juju