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Tara wants to stockpile the stuff for themselves, while Pam wants to continue business as usual. “We keep our heads down, our tits up, and the Tru Blood flowing.” Feeding on humans is only for private. Until…
Surpassing Hoyt in the My Chemical Romance Lookalike Contest
Uh ohhh… there’s a new sheriff in town. And he is emo as ballz. And he is feeding on a human on Eric’s throne! And public feeding is now allowed by the authority! Shiit! I didn’t know Fangtasia came with the kingdom.
The Obamas (aka everyone else)
Lafayette starts out by investigating the creepy blurry vamp face which showed up in Sookie’s bathroom last week. He doesn’t see it. That’s about as far as this storyline goes this week.
“Creepy spirit thangy! Why you in Sookie’s bathroom!” “I am not Whoopie Goldberg in Ghost. But I am wayyy prettiah.” WHAT! This is excellent evidence that the True Blood writers are in fact reading my recaps. Or, that we both make really lazy references. See my last week recap”
“Lafayette does an AWESOME Whoopi Goldberg in Ghost, pretending to talk to the Iraqi woman, and then actually talking to her.
much prettier than whoopi goldberg.”
Ha! And you thought tvgasm wasn’t influential/wasn’t able to retroactively affect a script that had already been written and filmed by the time I wrote last week’s recap!
Anyway, again, Lafayette gets the spirits’ messages once he isn’t trying to. This time, it’s from gran:
“Your gran says she is glad those striptease faeries is looking after you.”
Gran indicates that there’s some important evidence under Sookie’s bed, in gran’s box o’ stuff. They don’t really know what they’re looking for, but two items stick out: Jason’s report card, signed by Lynn Dearborne. We already know Jason had sex with one of his teachers, Miss Steeler, when he was in school. Did he do the same with Lynn Dearborne? We know she was ‘out of town’ and Bud was cheating when Andy stopped by a few episodes ago. We also find out the new fact that Sheriff Bud Dearborne discovered Sookie’s parent’s bodies. They don’t really know what this means, though:
“Dead folk! Why ya’all gotta be so cryptic? It ain’t cute!”
Jessica unfortunately doesn’t have much to do in this episode; her appearance is limited to a Rihanna-esque rationalization of Hoyt’s behavior to Kenya (who is horrified.) Jason (aka the person who ACTUALLY shot her in the head) pops in to offer some comfort, but she doesn’t want it. Jessica feels responsible for everything that’s happened to Hoyt, and plus, she can’t feel his danger signals through his blood any more. There is much wordplay on “the Obamas,” and the destruction of the “everybody poops” franchise. Jason deposits Jess safely back at her mansion.