Tweetgasm: The Bachelorette Not

Watercooler

By Flipit | | 12:40 am | 4 Comments
Posted in: Tweetgasm, Watercooler

Tweetgasm Bachelorette Not

I love writing TV Recaps mocking the shows I love to hate as well as the shows I love to love. Sometimes, though, I actually wish that I could get sucked into the tube and actually LIVE THIS SHIT, you know what I mean? I’ve taken up praying, Buddhism, heroin and simple deep breathing exercises and boom! I was transported to a new land. A land where I was thin, gorgeous, and had a sniveling brat to take care of. Oh, and also a woman and on TV. I know it’s a stretch. It’s a stretch because it’s a Tuesday. But Mondays? IT’S ON!

Please welcome our first TVgasm Tweetgasm Celebrity, BacheloretteNot!

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Early Monday

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Showtime nears…

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The show’s about to start! The show’s about to start and….

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It’s ON!! And one of the first shots is of…ducks?

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The story of the race car driving love of my life dying in a plane crash…AGAIN.

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Man

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Muppet

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Wowee! A single dad! Two singles make a…double. Or whatever.

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OK just regular dogs. I don’t know brands.

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Chris just brought up dead race love of life again. UGH.

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Flipit
About

Currently, Flipit's writing Real Housewives of Beverly Hills recaps, which you can find here. You can also find him doing a gossip segment twice a week called BS of the Day and video recaps of Project Runway All Stars, as well as spoof ReDubs of the coming soon trailers at the end of RHOBH!

Ronnie Karam has been with TVgasm since 2006 , which has given him the opportunity to make fun of hundreds of TV's most loved and hated reality whores. His plan in life was to be Julia Roberts but that plan was stolen by, well, Julia Roberts. He'll get you one day, JULIA ROBERTS!! When not making himself giggle for the gasm, Ronnie performs improv and sketch comedy at IO West in Hollywood a couple of times weekly while using the lovely California days to audition for commercial roles such as "ADORABLE MEXICAN UNCLE". Seriously. He would like to thank Jesus, Buddha and Xenu for the blessings they've bestowed. The writers here are the best around, and he's honored to be associated with them. Find video archives at CankleTV.com, or follow on Twitter @flipit

4 Comments

  1. 1
    itchy itchy
    Posted May 16, 2012 at 3:03 am

    Flesh-eating bacteria. It’s the hottest new trend for 2012.

  2. 2
    itchy itchy
    Posted May 16, 2012 at 3:05 am

    I predict in five years, Flesh-eating Bacteria will be the new botox. Just needs a catchier name.

  3. 3
    cherrylipgloss
    Posted May 16, 2012 at 4:33 am

    Why do these girls insist on dressing like tanya harding?…#getarealdress

  4. 4
    L Chienne
    Posted May 18, 2012 at 8:21 am

    Glad she kept Alejando and Alesandro, and the good natured skateboarding hair do from Utah and the black shirt guy with the nice voice; glad she cut Beau Bridges/Grandma and the dude with six kids but she should have cut the big egg man loose and that hotdoggin’ helicopter twit, too.

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