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Monday, January 14, 2013
1:28 pm
21 Comments
Tagged: Alejandra, bitchiness, bravo, drinking at work, funny, hollywood, idiots, inappropriate sex, inevitable breakups, mean girls, parody, real housewives of beverly hills, recap, restaurant jobs, restaurant wars, series premiere, tvgasm, vanderpump rules
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Recaps
Lisa describes Stassi as a jacked up cheeky little minx. With love, though. Stassi continues to read Jax the riot act – Jax interviews that Stassi attacks him all the time. Happy couple!
Meet Katie – wants record label, big neckace. Tom S. is headlining Viper Room. Do you know how many friends I have that headline the Viper Room? Like this Tuesday? Tom wants to be famous, not Michael Jackson fame – that’s too much! But some fame, please. BULLSHIT.
Lisa sits down with staff to talk about tippage. Who made the most tips is not a statement I’ve ever heard in a restaurant. Scheana the most, Kristen the second, Stassi slacker. People are cliquy. Scheana is from Villa Blanca. Good decision on Lisa’s part according to Lisa. Guillermo is Lisa’s business partner, says they need to sell specials. Stassi is the descendant of a Swedish princess. PPFFFFT. Stassi doesn’t know the menu. Or the wines. Let’s talk about the tip pool. Scheana thinks the pool is bullshit, Stassi says they have more teamwork. Scheana is making waves already.
Jax and Peter go out for drinks. They both hate Stassi, talk about sex with her, Jax flirts with the waitress. Calls her waitress. Peter calls it Don Jooolio. Ha! Manager my ass. Jax is from Florida. Nuff said.
Scheana heads to a recording session. She’s never sung before, but some porn/record producer said she looked like a brunette Brittney type, so she’s cutting a demo. It’s so terrible and porny. Even her boyfriend can’t keep a straight face. FYI, the demo she’s cutting, absolutely sounds like something I’ve heard in clubs, just to give you an idea of how hard it is to create that shit. Less phone sex more porn star.
At Stassi and Jax’s apartment, Katie, Kristen and Stassi day drink and talk about Scheana. Kristen and Katie think Stassi should give Scheana a chance, but Stassi isn’t budging. Scheana sucks, that is all. Stassi interviews that she and Jax are the leaders of the pack when it comes to the group at Sur. So go Jax and Stassi, so goes the nation. God help them. Apparently Stassi’s been cheated on a lot before, so that explains some of her icky feelings toward Scheana. Jax interviews that he and Stassi moved in together really early and she yells at him all the time. So they’re gonna work out. If there’s nothing that helps a struggling relationship, it’s reality television. Good Luck!
We head to Lisa’s house to give viewers the impression that Lisa “works.” Her business partner, Guillermo and Francis, the executive chef all arrive to test out some new sushi recipes. I don’t know if putting crispy onions on raw fish is “new” when it comes to sushi, but everyone seems to like it. The conversation moves to the servers and Lisa’s a little concerned about their behavior. They talk back, drink like fish on the job and are all sleeping together. Lisa grumbles a bit, but it’s clear she has no intention of setting or even enforcing rules that could govern the behavior of the idiots that work for her. Whatevs, ill-behaved people are way more fun to watch. Also, Stassi is friends with Pandora, so Lisa has a soft spot for her. Yawn.
At least they’re colorful.
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21 Comments
Please tell me there are more then just these 8 douches that work at this place!! WTF is Lisa thinking that it is ok for these girls to wear Napkins as dresses, with their boobies flopping around and no “knickers” underneath?!?! Hell when I was a server, it was black slacks, and we had aprons…Then again I worked at the Old Spaghetti Factory and they were always changing our uniforms!! As a hostess there, our we had to do the knee test with our skirts..if the skirt didn’t touch the seat cushion on the chair we were sent home!
When Lisa did her food tasting a few episodes back, were they are Sur or Villa Blanca? I don’t want to like this show, but sadly I do…it is just trashy enough that I don’t want to throw anything at my TV. Stassi can go eff herself! I can honestly tell you that the OSF was very clickie–sp?– But I worked at 3 of the 4 that are in Washington state…It was my first job in highschool and the only perks were, I had to be off by 10pm. So if I wan’t done, someone else had to finish my work..The only time we “pooled” tips were if we were the “floater” for the night. If you were a Sever Floater, you could walk away with about 40 bucks…if you were a busser floater it was about 15-20…ofcourse last in was first off, which never really made any sense…but it also meant that you could only make 10 bucks in tips that night…!
Looking forward to your recaps Alejandra!!
@Alejandra Thanks for doing such a good recap of this show. And not hating on it as much as most people. I think it will start growing on them when they get the joke.
The way those guys were talking about Scheana when she was in the booth, neither 1′s her boyfriend. They’ve both been her tricks and she’s a ho.
I hope it’s like that. Because if they’re both just that big of fuckwaffles and she’s just dumb as Chelsea on Teen Mom 2 I’ll end up having to feel sorry for her.
People keep saying all this stuff about Sur and how come Lisa would have a place like that.
She said herself how come. At the beginning when she says Villa Blanca is where you take your wife. And Sur’s where you take your mistress. You can put it on mute. And just watch her eyes when she says that. She made Sur to be the set of a reality show trashier than Real Housewives. And also to be able to lose some $ for tax related reasons. Without having to worry about getting caught out in a lie. Since she’s on tv.
And another thing. When they got asked about the meaning and said that about super whatever restaurant. That was a wind up too. Sur just means “south” in Spanish. Which they might’ve picked as a joke because of the tax stuff. That it was going to go south. Or maybe it’s located south of the other 1? I’m geography impaired. And not in BH so I don’t know.
You can tell the cast was picked for camera ready trashiness skills. Not real restaurant 1s. So it was also a crack about them. That if you go there you’ll get waited on by jump offs. Not marriage material. Or future real actors.
So glad somebody’s recapping this! I got suckered in.
If I could make a small request… More pictures? I have such a hard time keeping all these people straight, they are all just skinny bitches… So pictures would totally help. Yes, I know I could google them all, but I’m lazy.
Xoxo
Someone should tell Stassi some of us think you are looking for fame if you are on a reality show. She should be fired. Lisa is nothing but a hypocrite. Is this her being pushed around by her employees or is she what we see on RHBH?
The only time I was ever “allowed” to drink on the job, was when I had to do a wine tasting. Sure I got paid for that hour of work. But that was it. We had to go home after. That was our “shift” for the day. That was the nastiest thing I have ever done! I am not a wine drinker…I am shocked that Lisa doesn’t care…
Then again, I am pretty sure I am being played by Lisa, but whatever. I will still watch this show…
Wow, things sure are different in the Hills of Beverly! I’ve been a waitress in Washington State for over 30 years and there is no drinking on the job, ever! It is against the law and you would be fired immediately. Also, sharing tips? No fucking way! Then there is the whole health dept thing about covering your armpits and no open toed shoes. You just know that Stassi is gonna get wasted at work, spill something hot down the front of her damn near naked self and sue the living shit out of Lisa. And, if Stassi is Pandi’s best friend then Lisa has done a brilliant job of snowing us into believing Pandi is such a nice person. Like attracts like you know. Thank you for recapping, this show has the potential to be very entertaining…unlike RHOBH! When a woman that had a long term affair with a married man with a pregnant wife at home and then runs to tabloid tv to cry when she gets dumped so he can bone a horse faced singer is the only likable character you know this is must see tv!
Lisa should be getting served with Hostile Work Environment lawsuits any day now that the idiot Stassi admits what she does and still has a job. Psst – Lisa fire the potential lawsuit.
Is Kristen around 40? What is wrong with her face? I can’t figure it out.
@Labowner–The problem with her face, is that she isn’t as “hot” as she thinks she is!!
SquareHead–where did you/do you serve? The only time I was ever able to wear my hair down was when I was a Hostess at the OSF..when I was a server or a busser I had to have my hair pulled back… No one wants your hair in their food! All the kitchen staff had hair nets and hats…That was the one job I never did was kitchen…I did work dishes one day, but that was because someone Robbed the UWTacoma bookstore and then hid out in the resturant. So the next day, we had a shit ton of dishes to do!
Even as a hostess, you had to find slip resistant shoes. You know the black granny slip ons!
The only other time tips were pooled–if there was a huge party coming in 15 ppl or more you had to have 2 servers and 2 bussers..
A lot of fine dining restaurants do pull tips. They do it so no one can ignore a table or patron and use ” it wasn’t my table” as an excuse. That being said I dont think SUR is fine dining. States have different laws about dress and drinking when working. In my state you can drink but not be or appear intoxicated. In my state it is up to the business owner to in force their own staff drinking policy.
Okay, I second (or third or fourth) the motion declaring Alejandra a saint for recapping this Worse-Than-Bachelor-Pad-or-Temptation-Island-Piece-of-Freaking-Shit-Show for us. I was appalled, as were most of us, it appears.
Everyone made really good points about Lisa – like how in the HELL did someone convince her to put this trainwreck on the air? Money? But money that comes with a little extra something, like having your credibility FOREVER AND EVER OBLITERATED. I thought more of Lisa. We know damn well she would not let her employees behave that way or treat her like garbage.
I’ve been watching reality TV, and Bravo in particular, for far too long as I immediately knew what they were doing with the two hour RHOBH. Bad Lisa. Bad bad girl!
~Thisbuggs4u all over Bellingham. I’ve also been in the kitchen and yes to hairnets and shoes for crews! And how do you waitress without an apron with pockets for pens, order pads, straws, tips!
They just bend over and the customer slides a card between the cheeks of their ass is all I can figure.
I don’t even want to think about where they keep the pens and straws…
SUR…Sexy Urban Restaurant, so says Lisa. It isn’t fine dining, it’s an “upscale” bar with food. Villa Blanca is more like fine dining. Caliguy is taking me for our anniversary.
Privately owned restaurants have more lax standards than franchise ones do. When I bartended/served we could have shift drinks, depending on the restaurant drink during a shift and they wanted us to ‘look’ a certain way. Not like SUR mond you but we had to have a look about us. We also had to memorize the menu and orders no pens or pads. And I’ve ment plenty of people who do to new staff what Stassi does. It sucks but there’s always one.
Also someone else mentioned this. This show is a joke. As long as we remember this I think we can enjoy the love/hate about it.
Also, that chick who apologized for being really good looking??? Not even decent looking. WHOA, get a grip.
If I worked with Stassi she and I would have had it out in the kitchen by now. Laterz Stassi.
I’ll watch even if it’s to see the maniac dude straighten his hair and bitch about hairspray and drool over Jax. Kid’s not in his car, he’s fucking whoever he can, please!
I serve in Chicago and we can wear our hair down, a lot of that is dictated by local government, alcohol as well. In Illinois most of the law involving alcohol aren’t even state wide, its all done by local government. Any owner or manager with a brain however wouldn’t allow their staff to drink while they are working. I have worked places where we were allowed to drink during our shift and I am a piss poor server even after one shot. I have managed before and wearing slip resistance shoes is something a lot of corporate places do because it decreases your insurance payments.
Pooling tips does happen, it is stupid in most cases and encourages laziness, and there is one golden rule to places that pool tips. YOU NEVER TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH EVERYONE MADE! Fastest way to turn a group of servers into bloodthirsty animals… talk about who brought what amount to the pool. Everywhere I have worked with pooled tips you are never allowed to talk about how much you made, as in “you will be fired on the spot if we hear you”. So I guess it makes prefect sense for Bravo to include that little segment on the show.
Stassi sucks, there is one way to deal with a girl like her, irritate her every chance you get and be amazing at your job. I have dealt with “Stassis” before and being great at your job is the best way to drive her insane… oh and wearing the grey dress everyday.
I like how you think, @selfabsorbed! That truly IS the only way to outwit “Stassi”s, and it you’re so right it doesn’t hurt that it pisses them the eff off!
I wonder if the all girls school in New Orleans that Stassi went to was Ursuline Academy. I went to school across the street from Ursuline. Those girls wouldn’t even TALK to us public/magnet school students!
The really funny parts of the first show were when one character says something about “how good looking they are”……..not really seeing it. The second was the “guy” who was looking for his hairspray, saying “this sucks, babe” about 20 times. And Stassi trying to convince everyone about how they’re all famous models. Really? No one has ever seen you before…and you’re going the way of Speidi. There isn’t one of the girls that’s really pretty. And the guys are ok, but not that great. If they were, they wouldn’t be on this show.
Sur’s restaurant manager, Peter is the best looking most sensible re-occuring staffer on the reality show. I for one, would love to see more of him on the show. Why isn’t he a cast member? I hope others agree and write in to agree as well.
I really would never want to eat there. The waitreses and waiters are sleezy and probably have stds. Lisa does not have the business mind she thinks. Yes she is marketing her place and making it a place if interest, but there has to be good food and a good clean staff to keep it going.