LL, of course, loses it, considering she’s LITERALLY just poured her heart out to someone only to have it LITERALLY rejected, but Jax managed to salvage the situation by being as nice as possible. They both agree to just not spend every waking minute together – but they’ll still have just as much sex. THAT won’t change, Jax is sure clarify.
I can’t tell who’s dumber. I really, really can’t.
At Lisa’s house, Lisa and Pandora chat about Stassi and Stassi’s complete failure to turn in her column for like, two months. Pandora acts as though she could possibly look professional talking to her mommy about a completely pedestrian problem, while said mommy is lounging about in a pink bathrobe. I roll my eyes. Pandora has called Stassi there to the house to address the issue of the non-columns, and Lisa agrees that a conversation must be bad. When Stassi’s good she’s good, but when she’s bad, she’s… you know, Stassi.
After a break, Stassi comes in looking much like her high school self, pre-chinplant, and Pandora rips into her. Boring. Anyone else not like Pandy? She’s way to excited to have airtime right now. I don’t think she gives two shits about Stassi’s column. Lisa jumps in to talk about how Stassi’s fucking up at work at the moment, and without working for Pandy, there’s no reason for Lisa to overlook things at work. Specifically Lisa mentions the LL bullying stuff (GOOD), and Stassi still doesn’t have the right perspective on that. She defends her actions, claiming that LL represented the WORST betrayal of a friendship EVER. You still looked like an asshole texting her like that.
Stassi’s really broken up at this point, so Lisa gives her a hug, and promises our wayward fashion BLOGGER that she’ll get another chance – but it’ll be her last one. Pandora looks on and all I can think about is her underbite.
In Griffith Park, Jax, Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz attempt to convince America that they work out outside and not at Equinox like the rest of LA that overspends on stupid shit. They also girltalk like no other about Jax and Stassi and how Jax still has feelings for her. The boy part comes in when the Toms both tell Jax how much they wish Stassi would die in a fire, and that’s hilarious, but the whole scene makes them all a little less attractive. Oh, and in case you thought Jax and LL’s little slow-down was going to work? Jax takes yet another opportunity to interview about how he’s leading LL on and doesn’t want to do that to someone.
“Just break up with her already, Dude, we have to rehearse the kickline!”
At Sur, things get even more ugly than the previous display of West Hollywood masculinity when LL decides to confront Stassi at work and Stassi… is just way better at girlfighting than LL is. Every time LL makes a point, Stassi makes fun of her accent, or drops that Jax is texting HER night after night or calls LL pathetic, or tells LL that her and Jax’s relationship is not exclusive. It’s so shitty, both Stassi and LL ask to go home immediately after even though it’s Friday night. JEEZ, LADIES. Stop bitching about not having money when you try this hard to leave work on busy nights.