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Stassi has a whine session with Frank, who looks like he’s tolerating less and less of her bitchy bullshit, and then she tries to get Peter to cut her early. It’s a no-go, and Peter is awesome enough to point out her obvious hypocrisy regarding Jax and his Mental Patient du Jour, so poor Stassi has to work a full-length shift on her first day back from suspension. A suspension she received, you’ll remember, for not coming into work. Kristen’s been watching the entire thing go down, and she interviews that she’s loving every minute of Princess Stassi finally getting her due. I’d agree with her, but I still like her less than Stassi at this point, so, fuck you, Kristen.
And while Lisa continues to say that she’s not interested in the personal lives of her staff, she finds out Jax is already sleeping with LL, and feels the need to confront him about it. Not only because Jax was crying in her living room over Stassi, like, 12 hours ago, but also because LL is a recovering addict. Oooooh fuuuuuuuck. This shit just went to a whole other level. Run, Jax. Run. Jax interviews that, “Ugh, it’ FINE. I know she’s an addict. But she’s like, nine months sober.” Wow! Nine whole months? And she doesn’t work in a bar or hang out with heavy drinkers or anything that would compromise her sobriety, right? What? She does both of those things? Well, I’m sure it’ll be fine. Things like these have a way of working themselves out, especially when the subject is on national television.
“They never fucking learn.”
Stassi interviews that Jax told her he would revenge fuck a server at Sur, and darned if he didn’t pick the weakest link. Ouch. I can’t decide what I hate more – the fact that Stassi is referring to a human being as the weakest link, or the fact that she’s probably right…
Well, the shift ends, and Stassi presumably didn’t die, but socially she may as well have. Kristen throws a party and doesn’t invite Stassi, which makes it really easy to invite a whole bunch of other people, like Scheana, Shea, Jax and LL. Everyone comes over, has a great time, and Kristen interviews that she always liked Scheana, but previously didn’t want things to be awkward around Stassi. Fair. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made. The party still pretty much revolves around Stassi, though, as she remains the main topic of discussion. SchTina want to hear about Vegas, and Jax goes into some details including how he feels like he won the “fisticuffs” because he’s not with Stassi anymore. Heehee. Then the focus turns to LL, and she reveals that she called Stassi in an effort to be honest about the new relationship with Jax, but said honesty is backfiring on her HARD. She reads off paragraphs of texts Stassi has sent her, and they are the most horrible, awful, nasty high school mean girl texts I’ve heard in a long time. Like, in the current climate, if she and LL were at high school together, Stassi’d be suspended. Like, if LL wanted to press the matter, she could probably get Stassi fired. Like, if Stassi were to continue, LL could probably take some sort of legal action (I know that sounds extreme, but Los Angeles is, shall we say, litigious in the extreme…).