While we met Sophie, another auditioner was eyeing her and spewing jealousy and hate in her direction. We meet the ever so loveable Tara Simon – 27. Tara is a vocal coach – kill me now – who doesn’t believe her shit stinks. Her attitude to the industry and her own awesomeness bite my ass and she bugs the crap out of Simon too;
Tara Simon – Without You by David Guetta/Usher
DEAR BABY TEQUILA! Why is she doing this to my ears?! This is over singing at it’s best kids. She is SO over trained and over emoting that it is bugging the crap outta me. And where the hell is her lower register? The judges actually agree with me but instead of sending her on her way they give her four YAY!’s. Dumb. Sophie deserved those yay!’s more than Tara did. I hope she crashes and burns all over her ego.
Hey look! It’s tonight’s dad. Tonight’s dad is Daryl Black – 37. Daryl is married with five kids. So he wants a singing career to escape. Or to help his family. He says it’s the latter but I, as a parent, believe it’s the former. Up on stage he charms the judges and tells us he is going to sing a current song. YAY! I like when people actually sing current music;
Daryl Black – Stereo Hearts by Gym Class Heroes
OH LAWS NO! WHY did he cabaret the hell out of this song? I DO NOT like his version. I couldn’t concentrate on his voice as I was so bothered by what he did to this song. The judges really like his voice and so they blow smoke up his ass. I would have SLAUGHTERED him for his version of that song. Total wrong song choice in my opinion. But the judges give him four resounding YAY!’s so what do I know.
Our final audition of the night is Trevor Moran – 13. Trevor claims to be a bit of a YouTube celebrity and upon Googling kid I find that he even has an “official” YouTube channel. But it’s not for singing. It’s for dancing. I smell a fame whore. Wait. What’s that? The staff of the X Factor have lost Trevor. They search everywhere for him. Finally they find him laying in his mom’s lap and kid doesn’t look too well. The X Factor people call 911 and we get a To Be Continued…
So that was that. Do you have any favorites from tonight? Do you hate any of these people as much as I? Do you want a motorcycle cop/scooter brigade to go everywhere in life as much as I do?
Till Next Time,
Love and Poolboys,
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