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Sasha is going to work, and it's the first time she's ever worked. Parents please! Make your kids work already! It will help them when they reach what is called "the real world" and they have to do things like show up on time and actually use their heads for something other than a gang rag. Christ! She heads off to work completely exhausted. Sean peels out of there and Daton is close behind. Kelly takes off much to Asshat's dismay. He says, "Kelly always gets her way but it was just easier since I was on the fence about staying home." No you weren't. You totally didn't want to stay home but she's got your balls hanging from her car's review mirror so you caved. Only the house slave knows that about you, southern master.
Kelly is working at the pet store, moving the ferrets to yet another location. Who knew they were so transient? "It's good for [Asshat] to stay at home with the kids so he'll understand what I'm going through as a stay-at-home mom." Assuming he sticks around after this "experiment." Speaking of which, Asshat is at home dealing with giving one of the twins a time out.
"I'm very overwhelmed with the two of them, they instigate each other," he says. One of twins starts crying and he says, "What are you crying about now?" Probably your back-ass beliefs, and they look like Union boys to me, Asshat. Better watch yourself, they might instigate your employees into asking for 40 acres and a mule and your wife into demanding the right to vote. Now both the kids are crying and he's just standing around. Why isn't he playing a game with them or running around outside? Why would you just stand around and hope the kids stop crying. Idiot.
Alicea's killer nails are dialing her mommy because she's homesick. "I wanna come home," she says. But her mother won't have any of it. Isaiah wants to know why she's crying and she says it's because she misses her mom, and Isaiah tries to comfort her. Awww. And? This is why you should wait to have kids, because you STILL ARE ONE!
Sean is filling the tartar sauce cups at work and is waaaay behind the other teens who really need to work for a living, while Cory sweeps up the saw dust kicked up by Alicea when she was "working." Sasha did okay at the vet's office.
Jordan and Luke have bonded because Jordan plays a lot of games with Luke. Crazy how keeping a two year old busy will keep him from crying, although clearly Luke cheats at bowling. There is an absolutely adorable shot of Luke passed out on one side of the sofa and Jordan passed out on the other. Those two are in sleepy-sleeper land bigtime. It's pretty cute.
Alicea is watching Isaiah "fish" in the front yard and she says she really lucked out with this kid compared to the last one, which she had virtually no interaction with. "He's sweet, and he's funny as hell." She says the hard part is keeping him entertained. This is what I find so exhausting about kids, that zest for life that hasn't been drilled out of them by bitter high school teachers and taxes. He cheats at bowling too.
Kelsey asks Benjamin what's wrong, and clearly he's pooped his pants again. She takes him in the bathroom to change his clothes and of course the poop from his underwear falls onto the floor and onto her foot. Her BARE foot. At this point, I'd be barfing up a lung, that grosses me out so much. Smelly poo touching your skin. "My biggest problem is the smell." My biggest problem is the kids.
Ah, the working teens return home from work, and Sean and Kelsey are having a conversation no teen should have. "Did he go to the bathroom again?"
"He pooped."
You are eighteen! You should not be talking about this kind of crap! Literally and figuratively! You should be talking about where you want to eat tonight, what movie you want to go to, which flavor condom to use. Not poop! Never poop! Save that for your thirties and/or never!
Guess Who's Coming to Dinner! Poop Machines!
Oh, excellent! They are going out to dinner! You know I'm the person stuck sitting next to this table after specifically asking for a smoke- and kid-free area of the restaurant. Kelly gets pissed because Asshat lets the kids push the doorbell a couple of times when leaving. My dogs don't like it any better than she does.

