Spring is here! Let's check out some upcoming releases.
April is gonna be one sexy month.
17 again April 9th
Hey, a movie with Matthew Perry! I think I like Matt Perry. Glad to see he's back. And he's with Thomas Lennon (AKA Leutenant Dangle). And Matthew Perry's all dumped on and sarcastic, that's when he's at his funniest. I'm legitimately excited for this movie. Just as a cherry on top they throw a Murray brother in (Brian Doyle-Murray) as the wise old janitor, saying: "I bet you wish you had it to do all over again." Nice. Hey, Zac Efron's in this movie too? Wait a second! Matthew Perry turns into Zac Efron?! Nooo!! I've been had! They tricked me! No, I don't wanna like this anymore! I don't wanna watch, somebody make it stop! This is no underrated Matthew Perry comedy like The Whole 9 Yards or Fools Rush In. This is a Zac Efron tween comedy vehicle! Like High School Musical or High School Musical 2.
I wonder if George Burns fans were this hurt when he turned into Charlie Schlatter, if anyone had ever heard of Charlie Schlatter. And now I'm wondering if people were upset when Vice Versa turned out not to be a Judge Reinhold vehicle, but actually a Fred Savage vehicle. Wow, I begged my stepmom to take me to see Vice Versa because it had the kid from Princess Bride in it. I am truly through the looking glass.
Fine, I get it. I like the adults in movies now. I'm older. I don't mind. Now I can appreciate Thomas Lennon playing Zac Efron's dad throughout the movie. Although, to be honest I was very nervous about Joel Murray showing up as an apartment complex super and turning Lennon him into some dude from iCarly or worse, one of the Jonas Brothers. Luckily, that did not happen.
Now here's my big question for the trailer. Why does 17-year old Matthew Perry have to dress like such a douchebag at first? The awesome thing about gaining the power to go back and do it all again is that we can learn from our mistakes! He knows more about women, can act totally confident, and doesn't have to wear a freaking trucker hat cocked to the side. You're only in the body of a 17 year old!! You still have the brain of a normal, thoughtful, discerning 37 year old! Stop sayin' "'sup!"
Ohhh..that's the joke. That he's old so he doesn't get what's hip. He was just trying to act like a hip 17 year old. I get it. Okay, funny joke. I should have waited for the punch-line. I really need to start watching the whole trailer before I write these things.
Moving on, this movie ends up not being about going back to high school and getting a second chance to do it all over again. Apparently, it's about spying on your children and fake befriending them so you can give them fatherly advice from the inside. Matthew Perry (I refuse to call him Zac Efron) helping his son is a nice thing, I guess kids could always use a little help. But helping out his daughter gets a bit creepy. There's a scene in the triailer where 17 year old Perry sits with his teenage daughter alone on the bleachers out back of the high school, putting his arm around her, telling her it's all going to be all right. Perry, I don't want to tell you how to do your job as someone who has been granted a wish to inhabite your high school body with your adult mind, but I am pretty sure you're giving her some mixed signals, and if you don't realize that when a guy touches a girl after school by the football field she's gonna think you're into her, then no amount of high school janitor magic is going to save your parenting skills. Get away from your daughter you pervert!!!
CRANK 2 April 17th
You know how Crank was like Speed but instead of a bus is was his adrenalline he had to keep up or he'd die? Well, Crank 2 is like Speed 2. But instead of a Cruise Liner it's his heartrate. So, now I would like to do my written impression of the Crank 2 trailer.
HELLelicopter, flail, hospital, premise, PUNCHSMASH, Noooooo!!! What? iPhone, premise, FASTCAR, glasssmash, SHOCKINTENSE, HOLY CRAP!! Smog over desolate landscape, girlfriend touch, GUNFIRESTRIPCLUBSHOOTBADGUYS, mansion bikini, plot, PUNCHRUNFEETCONCRETE, old lady sex joke. [Repeat with Music Video]. Facetatooskateboard-WINDOWSMASH! Associates plot, landonacar windowjump. AHHHHHH!!!! Title gravelly voice-over. BOOMEXPLOSION! Set-up-quip. JUMPSCREAMPUNCH credits.
STATE OF PLAY April 17th
Comments (3)
State of Play is a blistering thriller, chock full of great stars and great acting (save one conspicuous exception - cough cough Affleck - ahem).
BUT this movie has a use-by date. See it before all the newspapers go under and the story loses its relevancy!!
1 of 3 | Posted by Donna Martin Graduates! | Posted on March 26, 2009 11:25 AM
DMG-
It's your old friend sutter kane, back to check out what's been happening with site and thank god i did- because someone has to leap to poor ben affleck's defense!
after robert downey jr, this guy is a study in how to execute a comeback. Now- to be fair- i haven't seen SOP yet, but I've seen the guy on politically incorrect, and i think he could could legitimately run for congress in ten years; there's no way he can't be at least credible playing a congressman.
and tell me you weren't at least a little impressed with gone, baby, gone! The guy's got directing chops, a good performance in hollywoodland, and what looks like a great supporting turn in mike judge's extract just around the corner. Ben needs your support- remember good will hunting? changing lanes? boiler room? he can be good, and we movie nuts have to support people that at least have the potential.
Not like paul walker...
2 of 3 | Posted by sutterkane | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:36 PM
oh - and nice work, 4theluvofHam. There's definitely an art to a great trailer, and you've got an eye for it, my friend.
3 of 3 | Posted by sutterkane | Posted on April 13, 2009 7:38 PM