I've been waiting for this day for a long time, Paris Hilton's hair extensions are here! I can finally have the long flowing blonde hair I've always wanted, it's just a clip away. It pays to dream big, because dreams really do come true.

In all seriousness, how do I get a piece of this action? I can maybe brand my own eyebrow extensions to make it a unibrow. Just clip it on and viola: Bert's sister. It'll be cooler than the eye patch.