The prizes for the show include $100,000 cash and a scholarship to the Joffrey Ballet School in New York. I was wondering what the point of winning this show was. Money is always nice, but a scholarship to a prestigious dance school could actually further (well…begin) a dancer’s career. Then I thought perhaps it would be a spot on ALDC or Dance Moms, but we know from Black Patsy that there’s no audition process for that. Although, what kind of school admits someone based on a reality tv show? I know you can get a Harvard certificate that way, but damn.
If you look closely, Tyra’s paper from Harvard is actually a Pancake Makeup Gift Certificate
There will be 12 dancers who will have to outwit, outlast, and outdance their compeititors. Ah, here it is. The full scholarship is for the young dancers program at JSBNY. I’m sure that’s great experience, but won’t the kids be looked down upon for winning a scholarship via an arbitrary producer-driven tv show? Maybe kids aren’t smart enough to realize that. But I’m sure their asshole mothers will!
“Why have you done this to me, mom? Crimped hair died along with Blossom hats.”
First we meet Kelly and Jordyn. The girl has been dancing since age 2, and the mom clearly loves being on tv.
Zack seems like a nice kid, but then a red flag pops up when he mentions that he doesn’t want to let the drama get to his head. Let it be known: people who say they don’t want drama are the biggest stunt pullers of tragic cunt theatrics. My fingers are crossed for some hissy fits on his part.
Zack is obviously thrilled to be here.
Meet Hadley and her mother. Oh great, she’s a dance teacher. That always works out well with ALM. You know this one is going to be trouble. The mom says they have all these sayings in their family to help Hadley. She starts “you gotta risk it…” and Hadley finishes “to get the biscuit.” Putting that through my Honey Boo Boo filter gives it a horrible meaning.
Oddly enough, that’s also Roman Polanski’s mantra.
Kelly is already saying that at this level of competition you can’t trust anyone. Why would you need to? I guess you treat them all like thirsty Nomi Malones who will push your ass down a flight of stairs to get that starring role.
I have no idea who this host is, but he’s easy on the eyes, and I’d rather have him than some screaming harpie like Mary Murphy.
I’m sure he’s happy with his career at this plum of a hosting gig.