About Last Night: Monday

The Gates: Alejandra

Chief No En Mexico Phelps was shot in the back of the head at point blank range, and Nick is practically jumping up and down passing out sparklers at the opportunity to investigate something no one can tell him not to. He finds out through a former officer (Brian Krakow!) at The Gates that Phelps used to make certain files disappear, and that’s why there’s always been very little crime… reported. The G-Team starts following up on all of the missing cases, finding out stuff about the Radcliffe’s and Hipsterwolf’s dad. Dylan freaks out on Claire again, so much so that she gets desperate enough to give Devon a vial of her blood for a “spell,” in exchange for another cover-up. Hipsterwolf’s dad freaks out on his son, and just hits him really hard in the face before revealing to Nick that he paid off Chief Phelps to erase his son’s record. Nick does some more digging and finds out that extortion was the Chief’s primary source of income. Dum dum duuuummm….

Also, Marcus gets a love interest so boring, she must be a supernatural psychopath of some kind, Devon is the one nut Nick can’t crack, and also kind of freaks him out, and Brett tells Andie he loves her. This throws her off because she really wants to make out with Charlie, but none of that really matters because she’s a succubus and so was her mom!

Design Star: SwellMell

In last night’s episode, the 10 remaining Design Stars were given the task of using musical instruments as their inspiration to transform a rooftop patio.

Hey guys, look we’re just like Mrs. Potts and Lumiere in “Beauty & the Beast,” and Nina is the beast. chortle chortle

Once again, the designers were split up into two teams: men vs. women; however, since the numbers were a little uneven the women draft-picked Dan (because he’s so magically delicious) to join their team. Dan also wields a mean carpenter hammer so I think the women hoped he would defend them against the evil Nina Gargamelda.

Sadly, there were no costumes for the designers during this challenge. I was really hoping for a musical design scenario where

Designers + Musical Instruments + Rooftop Patio =

Zoobilee Zoo, Zoobilee Zoo, Magic and wonder are waiting for you!!!!!

Check back Wednesday to find out if the designers make sweet Yo-Yo Ma music or if they crash and burn like American Idol (for geriatrics) Taylor Hicks.

True Blood: WaffleBoy

Hey there Gasmii, this week Bill and Lorena have a sex scene that you’re never going to forget. Yeah, a whole bunch of other stuff happens, but if you haven’ seen this week’s episode, trust me, their scene is the one that is going to stick with you.

Anyway, on to the highlights of all that other stuff. Tara still desperately misses Egg. Well, except for when her eyes are rolling back into her noggin during hot monkey love with that creepy vampire who is nosing around. Eric thinks Lafayette is doing such a good job selling V, that he gives him a super sweet new car. Wow, selling V is just like selling Mary Kay. You know, except for getting your throat tore out if you don’t make your sales goal. What? Really?? Okay, selling V is exactly like selling Mary Kay cosmetics. Oh and Sookie heads out to Mississippi to look for Buh-Ill (who is en Dan-Jur) with this pretty hunky looking werewolf guy, and does her best imitation of a lemming to locate her sweet baboo. And a bunch of other stuff happens, but mainly, Bill and Lorena do it, and, well words fail me.