About Last Night: Thursday

Mini caps of The Challenge, Top Chef Just Desserts, and America’s Next Top Model

The Challenge: VirginiaApple

So, I’m not sure if you guys have heard this one, but Johnny Bananas is a jackass, and no one likes him. What’s that? You have heard that? Seventeen times per episode for the past 12 seasons? Well, this week Camila has decided that she loves him, which raises a great deal of suspicion on her team- especially from poor Brad, who has been down this road as much as anyone (except for Walnuts, of course). The team thinks they can’t trust her, which would have made her an elimination candidate if the red team didn’t take home the victory in the challenge this week.

And oh, what a challenge it was. As ridiculous as these challenges are, they can be pretty creative and are rarely repetitive. To be able to say that about a show that is in its 20th season is pretty impressive. This week the teams had to stuff themselves though “bottlenecks” and be the first to cross the finish line. It wasn’t a thrillfest to watch, but it was entertaining enough (particularly when it almost led to the inadvertent beheading of Cara Maria).

The red team’s victory allowed the blue team to throw Katie and Big Easy to the wolves again, although Katie pretended to voluteer herself in order to take a brief break from the drama. Despite Cara Maria’s whining, the team decided it was time for Ayiiia to “prove herself” (which led to Ayiiia whining). Similar logic sent Luke in, but he was more than willing and in pretty good spirits despite being rejected by Camila in favor of the aforementioned Bananas. Oh, and the Gulag is one of the most stupidly awesome elimination rounds ever. I continue to wonder how on earth they come up with this stuff. Also, Abe and Cara Maria violate a piano. Come back tomorrow for the full recap and to find out who was eliminated!

Top Chef: Just Desserts: PottyMouth

Last night Top Chef Just Desserts put a sweet spin on a couple of classic Top Chef challenges. We started off with the always impressive mise en place challenge which as luck (or producer manipulation) would have it, pitted Team Diva against Morgan, Eric and Oyly. I like they way they adapted this challenge to a pastry chef’s prep, and it was fun to watch them bang out pie crusts, icing rosebuds, and whipped egg whites.

For the elimination challenge we got the dessert version of restaurant wars with the chefs remaining in their teams and opening competing bake shops. There are hits and misses on both sides, and some desserts that I would LOVE to actually try.

There are some meltdowns in the kitchen, and just like we saw in the previews, Team Diva get snippy with each other. The winning team walks away with thirty grand (oh my!) and the losing team sends someone packing. Come back in a couple of days and we can talk about snippy haggy divas, Morgan’s pretzel rage, and an ending that’s both delicious and satisfying. See you there!

America’s Next Top Model: P-Baby Walker

Right off the bat, we are treated to an insufferable Liz crowing because she got best photo and ended Ann’s winning streak.  Liz is the type that could be beaten 1000 times at something but if she wins just once, her head becomes a parade balloon and she never shuts the hell up about how awesome she is instead of being humbled by the victory. You’d think someone with two low paying jobs, food stamps, and a young child with no other parent would have some sense of humility but not our Liz.  She’s just as entitled as they come.

Miss J shows up at the model house and tells them they’ll be in a fashion show, bringing out cutie pie Zac Posen alongside professional models.  He engages in a question and answer session with the girls and they actually ask decent questions about the models he likes and the type of walk he’s looking for. Boring. I would have been asking him Desert Island questions because he’s so adorable and I think he and I would get along like two peas in a pod.  I’m tired of Tyra
treating this Project Runway or something.  It’s Cycle 15 Banks.  That ship has sailed.

Miss J brings in the professional models but before he unleashes them into the fashion show, he earns a few awesome points in my book by telling them to be mean girls to the ANTM models.  The whole point is to see how the ANTM models handle ribbing from other girls in the fashion industry which is fair as I’m sure it happens all the time. It should also FINALLY make for some interesting TV.  BTW, Ann, Esther, and Jane are absolutely horrendous runway walkers.  Chelsey wins the best walk for the challenge to so maybe she’ll stop being such a Negative Nancy at judge’s panel.

The photoshoot this week sees the girls rolling around like assholes on roller skates hocking some power energy water vitamin drink thing and Kayla freaks out because she’s gay and doesn’t kiss boys.  I would say get the fuck over it but she seems to have some deeper rooted problems with boys than just liking boobs.

Check back in a few days to see if Kayla pulls through with the shoot and who gets released back to middle America.