The Vonz: The Jukebox Tolls for Thee

American Idol

By youcantmakeitup | Thursday, May 19, 2005 | 8:30 am | 28 Comments

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Last night, Vonzell Solomon finally met her generically-produced, synthesized maker, and was voted off of American Idol. Not surprising really, and pretty much a deserved vote-off — Tuesday night wasn’t her best. I’d rather spend my time mourning the vote-off of Latoya London from a few years back, whose CD I still line up for each morn (dressed in my jazz pants best), only to be met with stares from those individuals who line up for OzzFest tickets months in advance.

That means that next week, as the Judge’s had predicted, Bo Bice and Carrie Underwood will battle it out in what is sure to be a sub-dued, gospel free finale. I am looking forward, however, to hearing the new “singles” that each singer will perform, and their take on the same song.

Anyone have any predictions for what songs each performer will or should sing in the finale? I have a hunch the AI producers scour these message boards for ideas. (Bo singing a capella? Carrie being a cyborg? That was all me.)

28 Comments

  1. 1
    hey
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 8:33 am

    I bet Carrie will end up winning…I think she has a bigger overall appeal to the audience.

  2. 2
    Miss M
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 8:36 am

    No way Carrie is winning…even though I think she definitely should. Bo irritates me almost as much as Constantine.

  3. 3
    America's Next Top Fan
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 8:50 am

    Well I didn’t get my dream wish of Bo jamming with Jethro Tull but Leonard Skynard is the next best thing and Bo fit right in. I think America provided us with the best matchup even though I despise not having a Constantine v. Bo final.

  4. 4
    Jason Mulgrew
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 8:50 am

    I would love to F Bo Bice in a tent. What a sexy mountain man. All that hair – DAMN it’s hot.

    Love,
    Jason Mulgrew
    Internet Quasi-Celebrity

  5. 5
    Mike
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 9:02 am

    If Bo and Carrie don’t duet on I’m A Little Bit Country / I’m A Little Bit Rock ‘n Roll, a great opportunity will have been missed.

    Heck, I’ll even settle for Louisiana Woman, Mississippi Man…

  6. 6
    RealityTV4Me
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 9:15 am

    Can anybody tell me what was up with that song that they all sang at the end? That was horrible!!!

    Miss M – I don’t understand your post. So which is it?

    On Tuesday night, Ryan gave us the “you must vote people” speech again and then said that only 1% separated the three remaining contestants. I wish we knew the totals and I hope he will at least give us the spread next Wednesday.

  7. 7
    Kathy
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 9:19 am

    BO should win, but Carrie will be a real close second.
    Would love to hear BO do “Whipping Post” again. I think it was his best performance this season.

  8. 8
    ToniFerrari
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 9:21 am

    Love the idea, Mike. Love it.

    Ok, been reading tvgasm for months and this is my first post. *curtsey* Hello, tvgasmland.

    All this season, I’ve been asking myself: Who do I want to hear on the radio? Chances are, I’m not going to buy the album, I’m not going to what Seacrest calls the “Best. Show. Ever.” (that Idols Tour) … my contact with this American Idol will be similar to my contact with Kelly Clarkson– a guilty pleasure that I catch on the radio sometimes.

    So who do I want to hear on the radio?

    That answer has not changed all season: Bo. I hope he wins.

    …and speaking of the Idols Tour, are they coming to LA? How much are the tickets? Should be have a Tvgasm Field Trip?

  9. 9
    Catie
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 10:01 am

    “If Bo and Carrie don’t duet on I’m A Little Bit Country / I’m A Little Bit Rock ‘n Roll, a great opportunity will have been missed.”

    OMG hahahaha!

    I wouldn’t buy a CD of Carrie or of Bo. But even with the Jesus hair, I like Bo better. Or well, I just have this intense hatred of Carrie that developed for basically no reason other than her big hair on a few episodes. So I’m for anyone that is not her.

  10. 10
    Alohaguy
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 10:44 am

    Carrie Underwear is BOOOOORRRRING……BO is HAAIIRRYYY…But Bo definitely has the edge that will sell more records…Clive said it all.

  11. 11
    Greg
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 11:25 am

    I know I’m just reading into things too much (as always) but did anyone else notice at the end when they turned around to watch Vonzell’s goodbye tape, that both Ryan and Bo put their arm on her back at the same time, leading to another uncomfortable pullaway?

    Yes, I need a life, and I’m aware of this.

  12. 12
    RexRockhard
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 11:34 am

    Does anyone else wonder if giving Bo Bice the key to the city in what is probably the same courtroom that he was convicted for cocaine possession gives a bit a of a mixed message?

  13. 13
    jess
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 12:13 pm

    Greg, I too was hoping we’d have another Zapruder tape to watch of Bo and Seacrest fondling each other.

    Boys? Do ya have something for us??

  14. 14
    merryberry
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 12:33 pm

    REX – I was wondering the same thing…lol. Bo for sure all the way. Oh thank you so much for tvgasm…I’m glad I found you!

  15. 15
    merryberry
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 12:34 pm

    Anyone else notice the ‘green’ room is really the COKE room? And the strategically placed coke bottles? I just caught onto that this past week…pretty lame.

    Go Bo!

  16. 16
    merryberry
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 12:45 pm

    ALthough I like and choose Bo to win, one thing I have to say::::

    ZOOM

    The man’s teeth are quite yella.

  17. 17
    RealityTvHo
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 1:07 pm

    I use to think Carrie would take it all but Bo has grown on me over the weeks and Carrie’s rendition of “Man I feel like a women” about made me hurl (Constantine would have been sexier doing that song). Anyhoo, I’d like to see Bo win and I’d love for him to sing Turn the Page by Bob Seger.

  18. 18
    Victoria
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 1:12 pm

    I will totally buy Bo’s album. He was awesome on Tuesday. Plus…

    I DON’T LIKE CARRIE!

  19. 19
    Victoria
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 1:15 pm

    You guys realize we’ll get to see Constantine in action again next Wednesday at the finale. Oh boy. I can’t wait. Especially for what you all say after the fact.

  20. 20
    Kelley
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 1:26 pm

    Victoria-

    Are you serious? I am so excited to have Constantine back in the spotlight to make fun of! Are all the idols performing?

  21. 21
    Victoria
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 1:38 pm

    Kelley

    Yes! I’m serious. All of the idols come back for the Wednesday finale to pimp the Idols Tour.

  22. 22
    Retroqueen
    Posted May 19, 2005 at 2:57 pm

    “If Bo and Carrie don’t duet on I’m A Little Bit Country / I’m A Little Bit Rock ‘n Roll, a great opportunity will have been missed.”

    Caught without my Depends again, thanks Mike!

    ROFL LMAO PMPL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  23. 23
    RealityTV4Me
    Posted May 20, 2005 at 11:24 am

    I just noticed that Vonzell’s hand is white. A little PhotoShop editing, youcantmakeitup?

  24. 24
    youcantmakeitup
    Posted May 20, 2005 at 12:31 pm

    I thought it was obvious that I put her head on Fonzie’s body. Oh – and I work my magic with MS Paint if you can believe it.

  25. 25
    Lucy
    Posted May 20, 2005 at 10:26 pm

    If Bo Bice wins, this will be the only time in history these people ever got it right. (My apologies to offended Fantasia fans.)

  26. 26
    Catie
    Posted May 21, 2005 at 1:42 pm

    That’s not true! They got it right when Kelly won. Would you rather have had Sideshow Bob/Justin Guarini?

  27. 27
    Stefanie
    Posted May 22, 2005 at 10:03 am

    first season–white chick.
    second season–black guy.
    third season–black chick.

    so…..fourth season? WHITE GUY!

  28. 28
    megstar
    Posted May 24, 2005 at 3:53 pm

    I feel Bo should win because I can stand him better than that Stepford-Clone carrie underwood.

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