Modeling Is A Dirty Business

America's Next Top Model

By admin | Friday, May 6, 2005 | 12:06 am | 27 Comments

brittany_mud Now that America’s Next Top Model is down to it’s last six girls, I have to start wondering about some troubling scenarios. For instance, what happens if my favorite goes home? Last year I was down with Pink Positive, so even when Norelle left, I had not trouble getting behind Anne and Eva. This year? Ugh. For me, there is not much after Naima, so you know that I was particularly upset when Tyra called her forgettable last week. Judging by how Naima has won the Cover Girl model of the week for, well, every single episode, a lot of people out there agree with me. Also, last week, I called out a girl, SS, for being a bad kisser. Well my friend, let’s call him MP, says that after acquiring a few more data points, he wants to revise his statement. I owe you an apology SS. Sorry.I think everybody knows that I can’t get enough of Tyra, but the girls on the show simply eat it up whenever she is around. As luck would have it, Tyra also brought some African food with her, so the girls could get their grub on. I’m not sure if it means anything, but you know it’s not simply coincidence that Keenya answered the door when Tyra brought the food. I know she eats when she is nervous, but hasn’t she heard of a rice cake or something? Anyway, Tyra likes to have fun, as evidenced by her jumping on the bed to wake up one of the girls. What a great image to wake up to, although it would be better if you woke up and she was sleeping next to you. Tyra also likes to get serious, and whenever she is going to spend time with the top models in situations like these, she always takes the time to break it down a little bit.

Keenya mentions that all of the stuff about her weight really had an effect on her, and that’s easy to say, but as soon as Tyra leaves, she begins to go back for seconds. Sure, they aren’t eating at a French restaurant, but if she has a problem to deal with, Tyra is going to try and help her. Denying that there is a problem, then indulging yourself is not going to get you anywhere. As somebody who said “she struggled with the same problem”, you might want to listen how she was able to get through it.

Tyra does have some words of advice for the girls. Naima admitted that when she was younger she had troubles after her parents divorce, and so she became a wild child. She would stay out late and drink and party. It’s a life she doesn’t want to ever remember. Bankable says that she still had to find a balance between letting her personality go, or holding back and seeming like you are boring.

Ms. Banks is usually good with that type of advice, but I have to take issue with something she suggested when the girls asked how they could be more comfortable in front of the judges.” When nervous, simply imagine the judges are in their underwear,” she said. Well, I can understand how this sort of tactic might work on a great portion of any panels or committees in the country, it is not going to work with the judges of ANTM. First of all, Tyra models for Victoria’s Secret, so she is always going to look good. Second, even though they might get more nervous seeing Tyra in her underwear, it would have made the girls sick to see Nolé in his jimmies. The too much information portion of the evening is brought to you by me, who thought “what if Nolé goes commando”. God, I am not going to sleep in weeks with that image glossed into my head.

With their new advice from our host freshly in their minds, the girls were ready for their challenge the next day. They all learned that they would have 2.5 hours to do some Go-Sees, and return in time to be evaluated. For those of you who may not know, Go-sees are a chance for a model to see a designer in person, get a feel for their clothes while at the same time getting the designer a chance to know them, and how their bodies were going to look.

Everybody was given a taxi, and I think these taxies were more pimp than the blue van the girls have been driving around in. Couldn’t they have imported an Escalade or something? Perhaps even a minivan that was made in the last half century or so? These girls should be traveling in style, right? So the girls had their own drivers, meaning that they weren’t likely to get lost on their way to any meetings. But since they did have a firm deadline, meaning girls were going to have to make good use of their time.

Both Naima and Keenya believed that they were going to have to perform well because of their status in the game, but for the most part, the Go-sees simply emphasized mostly what we thought was true with all of the girls. Brittany said she was a professional, but you know she isn’t going to be holding anything in. Christina is an ice queen. I hate to use the phrase because it has been overdone this season, but it really is the best way to describe her. You wanted a chance for the designer to get a good impression of you, and Christina came across as unapproachable and distant.

keenya_vs_kahlen Not everything was fun and games however. At one point, Naima and Keenya made it to one of the designers at the same time. Technically, Naima got there first, and the proper etiquette might have been to let the person who got their first to go first, and the other person would wait. This strategy wasn’t good enough for Keenya, and she powered up the stairs past Naima to get to the designer first. It really pissed off Naima, but she was able to hold it in and do her thing after Keenya had finished, or at least until she was ready to move on. At her next designer, Keenya showed she was really out to win. This time, it was Kahlen who had arrived first, and the two girls fought it out to see who would be in the door first. All of those extra meals did Keenya some good, as she was able to muscle her way past Kahlen. All that hard work pushing Kahlen out of the way didn’t do much good, as the designer said she “was a bit fleshy”.

Most of the girls tried to make a choice between arriving on time and seeing more designers. Although Christina took time to do a five minute go-see with one last designer, she was so rushed it looked like she was uninterested. Despite that, everybody made it back to their meeting point, well, except for Naima. With only several minutes to go before she needed to go back, Naima decided to visit not one, but two other designers on her list, thinking that seeing them face to face was more important than being on time. In some circumstances, you could say that was the case, but in this competition, missing a deadline can be the difference in staying or being eliminated. And although she was 45 minutes later than she was supposed to be, she didn’t seem to be penalized, and the designers that met her liked her. Brittany and Keenay were also well liked, and Kahlen was seen likable, but seemed too innocent for some. Not surprising anybody, Christina didn’t make a good impression with her personality.

Keenya’s hard work ended up working for her, as she won the challenge and a dinner that night with Craig Port. She was able to bring one person, and of course she took Brittany. A limo came to pick them up (an early-nineties mercedes limo, don’t they have any new cars in this place? I know they have car theft problems, but shit.) and they were whisked away. They had on a pair of slink black things, Keenya’s looking slightly less slinky than the last time she had it on, and made there way to what they thought would be an intimate dinner with one of South Africa’s top designers at his home. When they got there, they learned that Craig invited a few friends over, and it was suddenly a fairly big industry shindig, the perfect place to be if you wanted to get some attention from designers.

Both girls wanted to get some attention, but when you are trying to compete with Brittany for attention, you aren’t really going to win that often. Brittany is made for these types of situations, and when you saw that it became informal and everybody was boozing it up, she was determined to be the center of it all. Keenya and Brittany have been the best of friends, but Keenya was extremely jealous as the night wore on. She felt that she won the competition, so she should be getting the attention. I say that winning the challenge gets you in the door only, you have to do the rest yourself . On the way home, Brittany and Keenya were going over how much fun they had, when Keenya made her feelings known, in a passive-agressive way, and Brittany asked if Keenya wished she had picked somebody else. It could have been the editing, but Keenya said nothing. Is it the first sign that these two are in store for a breakup? Even Pink Positive couldn’t hold it together for the whole time last season.

When the girls arrived at their shoot the next day, they were in for a little bit of a surprise. They were already out in the bush, but to get to the location of their shoot, they would have to goo kloofing. What is kloofing you say? It’s a type of outdoor activity where you follow the path of a body of water wherever it may take you, including whatever may be in the way. The models didn’t have to do anything so crazy as jump off of a waterfall, but it was humorous to watch them wade through the water. Most people didn’t complain, and let’s admit it now, it was good to see them in wetsuits.

Finally reaching the location for the shoot, the girls learned that their little trek wasn’t even the biggest surprise of the day. Jay Manuel, who is always able to find some sort of couture piece of clothing, including a wetsuit, told them that they were going to do their own makeup, hair and wardrobe. Not particularly difficult right? You would think that these girls learned something about hair, makeup, and style during their time on the show. Well, the thing was that their wardrobe had to be made from the environment, and that made for some interesting choices. As you could imagine, Naima took it very seriously and she chose some brush and some earth (yes, she dug up some dirt and used it). Kahlen sort of went with it. She didn’t really have an idea of how it would all tie together. Keenya was looking for stuff that would hide her stomach. If it makes sense, Christina sort of looked like a Slutty Pocohantas Salad. I had no clue what was happening. Brittany, she just rolled around in the mud.

With the so few girls left, you start hearing some new criticisms with some people, and the old criticisms for others start to spring up. For Naima, Jay noticed that she didn’t look so good full frontal, so to speak. I guess most of her shots have been in profile, and he said something was missing when she was posing full on. For Kahlen and Keenya, the trouble was with their posing, and Keenya had the added problem of having to work around the little belly she has been packing on. At least she is still fitting into the clothes at the go-sees, unlike Cassie from last season. For Brittany, and at times Keenya, she seems like she isn’t taking things seriously. She has been getting some awesome shots lately, but when she doesn’t work, she reverts back to slutty instead of just sensual.

I would like to say more about Christina, but what is there? We know she is very caring. When Naima, Kahlen, and Christina were home while Keenya and Brittany were partying, they all had a nice meal and Kahlen called her the most caring person in the house. You can see it, when the cameras weren’t around, and the judging didn’t matter, she helped Kahlen when her friend died. When the camera is around, she becomes clinical, or as jay described her, mechanical, in just about everything she does, whether it be posing or in her interviews in front of the judges.

Anyway, here are the pictures from this week:

At the judging, the the remaining contestants learned of a little twist. They have been learning about how to be a model throughout their time on the show, but they were also learning about the industry, and the panel gave each girl a chance to critique the pictures of the other girls. Overall, I was quite surprised at how much knowledge the girls brought about each other’s photos, especially Kahlen. She plays the one that is always lost and naive, but she, along with Naima, were the most insightful about giving comments. Christina also had some good comments and looked like she was thinking before she spoke. Keenya, well, when I think she took the advice she got from Jann Carl a couple of weeks ago a little too seriously. When pressed for something to say, she just rambles, not making much sense, and it sounded like she was really just trying to make the other girls look bad. When she came to describe Naima she said she didn’t like the picture because it made her look dirty in her underpants. Wha? Are you saying she is a slut? She’s on the rag? It made absolutely no sense, until you heard from Brittany who simply said “Yeah, that’s nice” or “It looks good”.

The girls then got to choose who was the most model like and who was the least. Everybody picked either Keenya or Kahlen as the top, while three people picked Christina as least likely, including Christina’s close friend Kahlen and Naima. Keenya said Naima was the least likely, and Christina said Brittany was the least likely.

When it came down to judging, we once again heard a lot of old criticisms about the same people. Keenya was gorgeous, but hadn’t been working that hard, but may not be made for modeling. Naima was praised for her critiques, but again they said she loses a little from the front and that they want to see a little bit more of her emotion come out. Kahlen had the most praise, largely because I think she was working with low expectations. Everybody expected her to be stupid during the critiques, but she surprised. Her pictures have been great as of late, and I think the judges are proud she bounced back from her little personal tragedy.

The last two girls were Christina and Brittany. For Christina, it once again was the same critique as always. She’s the ice queen, everything she does is like surgery, so very professional and unremarkable whenever you think about her. Brittany was the other extreme. She has been taking great pictures, and is a great personality, but the judges were very upset how little she learned about the industry and appeared uninterested in the evaluations of the other girls. It’s OK to party hard, but you have to work hard as well. (I’m also wondering when people will start noticing the huge divot in her chin. It’s bigger hole than the one i leave hitting from the rough with a 9 iron) It’s not at all a surprise that Christina was chosen to go. Her upper lip was really bothering the judges more and more each week. It was a wakeup call for Brittany, and Keenya still has a lot of work to do. Naima and Kahlen are the girls to beat.

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27 Comments

1

fated

Posted May 6, 2005 at 12:38 am

when tyra called out keenya\\\’s name first at the final judging, i was surprised. i didn\\\’t like keenya from the beginning. she\\\’s plain looking, her pictures are not impressive, and she\\\’s annoying and selfish. i was glad to see brittany steal her thunder at the party. served her right.
2

debbie

Posted May 6, 2005 at 1:16 am

Actually Tyra called Naima’s name first then Keenyah, then Kahlen leaving Brittany and Christina in the bottom 2.

I love your recap J-Unit:)
3

Steven

Posted May 6, 2005 at 6:29 am

Christina’s environment wardrobe reminded me of Cher circa 1973
4

Katie

Posted May 6, 2005 at 9:34 am

Go Brittany! Yes, she isn’t very classy, but I love her pics and she’s willing to get down and dirty for a good picture.
5

moonman

Posted May 6, 2005 at 9:34 am

Keenya is just not smart. She knew Britney would be the “party girl” and show her up. If she was thinking, she should have picked Christina (very very dull and blends into the background at parties). Trya is starting to grow. I know she is a supermodel, but damn, her arms look HUGE during the judging.
6

Catie

Posted May 6, 2005 at 10:44 am

I’m with you J-Unit, I don’t think I’d be as into the show if Naima got sent home.

I thought Christina was the right choice this week. She really does come across with no warmth or feeling. I’m sure she isn’t like that in real life (even if she seemed blah on the show), but she couldn’t seem to get rid of that Village of the Damned-look.

I can do without Keenyah. I don’t think she’s a big girl at all, but if you are in a modeling competition and the judges have told you that your weight is starting to be a problem… wouldn’t you be more careful about what you ate? After they said they had to do a lot of retouching to her stomach in the last shoot, I’m surprised that she wasn’t embarassed enough to watch herself. I’ll probably get yelled at by someone, but like I said- I don’t think she’s fat. It’s a MODELING competition and the girls should heed the advice of the judges if they want to win…sneaking seconds after Tyra leaves isn’t really doing that. Plus, I hate her hair.

Besides Naima, Kahlen is my favorite. She’s got a ton of potential and obviously she’s been paying attention to what the judges are looking for. It’s too bad she can’t look more sexy.

I actually like Brittany, but I don’t think she’d outlast Naima & Kahlen. She better not.
7

sg-dub

Posted May 6, 2005 at 12:47 pm

I can’t really disagree with the final 4. (though I still wish Britta was given more of a chance, even though I’m not a blondes guy at all.) Next week is Keenyah’s time to go, then Christina. Since the girl who wins everything never wins it all (see April Wilkner and Ya-Ya), I’d guess Little-Girl-Lost Kahlen will take home the bacon.

And if you think about it, the prize for winning ANTM is potentially the best there is. a 500 grand contract, but if you don’t screw it up, you can make a career out of your prize, as opposed to the other shows where you get only slightly more after taxes, and then you have nothing.

And Tyra… shut up. this is MODELING, not brokering peach in the middle east. Christ, just look hot and don’t be a bitch. That’s all it is, really. (Unless you’re insanely hot, then you can ratchet up the bitchiness.)
8

syd

Posted May 6, 2005 at 2:14 pm

Keenya’s face looks like Mr. Peanut
9

theryn

Posted May 6, 2005 at 6:45 pm

Keenya is so tired. She said that even though she was from Compton she did not speak “ghetto” and that she did not relate to being “ghetto” as a way of calling out Tiffany’s less polished dialect. I hate that “I’m the whiter Black girl” competion bullshit! Of course Keenya invited a white girl to share her prize for winning the go-see challange: dinner with industry people at designer Craig Port’s lavish Cape Town plantation. But wait, Keenya was then hella hating on Brittany when Brittany wowed the masses and “stole” the spotlight with her funny drunk pay-attention-to-me white girl slut routine. All Keenya had to do was step up her game but why do that when it is far easier to whine? Pauvre fille .

Whatever, God willing and the creek don’t rise Naima gone take this bitch.
10

yourmom

Posted May 6, 2005 at 9:58 pm

Well of course she picked a white girl to go with her, Keenya is the only black girl left.
11

Leeya

Posted May 6, 2005 at 10:56 pm

I really don’t know what the judges see in Keenya. for someone who’d obviously gained a lot of weight recently, she should be more conscious of her gut and conceal it more carefully. in her pictures she looks decent, but in person she’s pretty butt ugly. and her personality lately has shown a lot of cattiness. although I pray that they’ll eliminate Keenya next week, I have a feeling that Brittany will be the next to go since apparently everyone thinks that she’s THE “biggest” competition.
12

Leeya

Posted May 6, 2005 at 11:00 pm

“I have a feeling that Brittany will be the next to go since apparently everyone thinks that she’s THE “biggest” competition.”

by “she’s” I meant big pregnant-looking Keenya.
13

joslyn

Posted May 7, 2005 at 5:59 am

SG-Dub:
I thought the prize was $100,000 contract, not $500,000.
I hope Keenya gets voted off next week, too. She is incapable of combing a weave correctly and I hate her Chiclet teeth. I see her future in the “before” picture in a hair relaxer ad at best.

I’m sorry, I agree with the judges, Naima is not all that outside of profile shots. Look at the “best shots” picture from the show. I can’t even say she is sexy. I dig her personality though and she probably would be a great person for photographers to work with. Ummm…Go Kahlen?
14

theryn

Posted May 7, 2005 at 4:00 pm

Well of course Keenyah is the only Black girl left. But she is not the only woman of color left. It is about internalized oppression. Now I know that “internalized oppression” is most likely a new concept to you and one that is quite unfamiliar to members of dominant culture but try this, google “internalized oppression” and see what you come up with then try to HOLLA back. Ok? K.

Women of color who pretend to be invisible to each other are often playing out the values of dominant culture that only serve to divide us instead of unite us. This does not mean that Keenya and Naima have to be friends but it does mean that they would not dis each other because they are the only Brown women left. I believe they would get each other’s back in spite of not liking each other. They would be supportive of each other to the end. It is an artifact that’s part of a process known in African American literature, literary criticism, race philosophy and sociology as “eating the other” (feel free to look that up too) only in this case it is the “other eating the other” because of a perceived gain. More than just the basic competition of ANTM itself is the significant (though micro) gain of being seen as the “better” Brown girl. The Brown girl that can fit in with dominant culture best ergo choosing Brittany over Naima to go to the party (which of course, at the end of the day bit her in the ass).

Besides, Keenyah is not trying to connect to any of the women of color on ANTM hence the “ghetto” dis on Tiffiny when she was around. Keeyna is one of these sistas who wants to create as much distance between her and other Brown women believing that this will make her stand out from the rest of the ethnic women. Let’s also not forget that when Brandy and Tatiana had beef Tiffany showed love to Brandy even though she felt Brandy could have handled the situation differently. Where was Keenyah? That Black girl was all about turning a blind eye. Whatever with Keenyah (and she does have a head shaped like a peanut).

Another example of this dynamic playing out on ANTM was the riff between Eva and Yaya last cycle. Part of Yaya’s hateration on Eva included creating a good Black girl (refined, educated, proper) vs. bad Black girl (ghetto, street educated, rough edged)dynamic by where Yaya would be more disirable by dominant culture. Of course that bitch got tricked in the end and Eva pulled it out.

Further, just so you know Yourmom, those of us on Black girl blogs know what time it is with Yaya and Keenyah’s game and trust, if it were high school both of those bitches would get beat down for pulling that shit. How dare either of them use white racism as a tool to score points at the expense of other Black girls. (Other examples of these kind of Black women are Mariah Carey and Nichol Richie: always trying to impress, be with, be one of the pink toes while acting like they don’t connect to the very African roots that have made them both famous. Mariah’s voice and Nichol’s daddy’s dollars. Please. Hell for that matter Cameron Diaz and Keanu Reeves too).

But let’s be real Yourmom, everyone is going to read the text of ANMT through different lenses. The world is often NOT what it appears to be. That is why many perspective are valid and acurate. Have some humility and look beyond the odvious and if you can not see then trust that others do. Respect, ok?
15

omg

Posted May 8, 2005 at 1:17 pm

whoa theryn, easy.

i think most of what you say is true, but wow, we’re just trying to enjoy a silly reality show here. it’s not as if the winner of ANTM ever actually becomes the “top” model in america, and therefore has this huge responsibility towards their race because of it.

relax and enjoy the silly wannabes.
16

omg

Posted May 8, 2005 at 1:18 pm

and wait a second—did you call me a pink toe? what’s up with that?
17

wha

Posted May 9, 2005 at 12:17 pm

Pink toes? Luckily I am not offended by such a racist term that has been used in more than one comment by theryn.
18

America's Next Top Fan

Posted May 9, 2005 at 1:29 pm

is that where i’ve heard that term before. or was it howard stern? theryn you are on a roll.
19

smithie

Posted May 9, 2005 at 4:45 pm

I like pink toes, am I suppose to be offended by that? it’s cute.
Also what ethnicity made Cameron Diaz famous? I know her grandpa is Cuban, but I didn’t realize her major fame and dollars is based on 1/4 of her ancestry. I bet she’d be sad to hear that.

I love America’s next top model!
20

theryn

Posted May 9, 2005 at 5:13 pm

Hey Omg, I AM having fun…honest, I was laughing the whole time I was writing it.

However, you are right though ANTM is a silly little show and I certainly can respect the light heartedness of this blog. I get so excited that folks might be sharing their thoughts about the dynamics of relationships playing out under the lenses of big brother and that the many viewers of these shows actually have a forum to communicate what is on our minds.

I feel like yourmom’s commit was an opportunity to have a discussion about racial dynamics on reality TV. These dynamics are often present but never really explored or discussed. What is a Brown girl to do?

As for “pink toes” being derogatory? Well as you can imagine I Googled “pink toes” and guess what came up? PINK TOES for real!

and please, please, please don’t get me started on what is racist and what is not. I am not trying to be offinsive. I just write and well…
21

America's Next Top Fan

Posted May 10, 2005 at 6:31 am

theryn, good grief, who knew pink toes wasn’t a racial slur. even though it sounds soooo bad. Pink toes are all over the internet according to Google. From now on I’m nicknaming my friends pink toes, brown toes and yellow toes.
22

wha

Posted May 10, 2005 at 6:49 am

Hey ANTF
Don’t forget the red toes for our Native American friends!! *<:o)
23

omg

Posted May 10, 2005 at 10:27 am

theryn-

i appreciate your response and perspective. but try to imagine what you would’ve thought had someone referred to keenya or naima as “brown toes” on this board.

then again, i can dig ANTF’s idea to rename all our friends! then everyone’s happy! it’s settled!

love,
pink toes
24

Ashes

Posted May 10, 2005 at 12:09 pm

Some of the comments about race led to an interesting non-racial point. As someone said, it’s not like the winner of ANTM will actually become a top model. I understand that girls come on for the reality tv exposure even though by now they should realize that no one from past seasons is truly a top model. (At least with a show like American Idol, a couple of past people have had bona fide hit albums and been nominated for Grammys so there’s a small chance that being on the show might jumpstart a real career.) And Cover Girl stays with it because the show does decently and has ratings potential. But how long before the bubble bursts? How long will agencies cooperate with the show and give the winner a contract if we never see a single winner go on to real success in the industry? I don’t know much about the models’ world, so are past ANTM contenders getting real work that we just don’t hear about in the real world?
25

Jess

Posted May 16, 2005 at 6:02 am

Thank you, VH1, for the ANTM marathon this past weekend. NOW I understand what y’all been writing about all this time!
26

diana

Posted May 19, 2005 at 12:09 am

They made the wrong choice for the winner!! I cannot believe they chose Naima over Kahlen. Kahlen was exceptional in her work and rose to every challenge. She made the greatest transformation and she deserved to win!!!!! Naima was boring and her pictures were not near as good as Kahlen’s. Naima’s face looks like an elf! I am in shock!! The judges screwed up this one soooo bad. By the way, Naima is not every girl. And speaking as a Mexican, she is no Mexican! She doesn’t even know what that means. I am furious!!
27

ziggy

Posted May 20, 2005 at 6:33 am

i love me some naima…..i am soooooooo glad she won ….she is sooooo smart…lack of personality my ass….she already have a personality as being a quiet individual…she should not have to act like a wild cat to have a personality….luv her….haha naima u rock…

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