It feels like forever since the last recap, Gasmii! Last week was a repeat followed by a highlights show which I spent none of my time watching. Instead, I watched my DVR’d American Idol, Survivor, my DVR’d Spice World movie and a billion episodes of The Good Wife on Netflix. Another time filler? The Royal Wedding! I am shitting myself with excitement over the Royal Wedding. I am so excited that I capitalize Royal Wedding like it is a proper noun. Anyway, the point is, I’m well-rested, all caught up on my stories as Mr. P-Baby calls them, and back in action.
Did anyone else forget these bitches were going to Morocco? Because they are there now. I’ll bet three out of the five of the remaining wunderkind still think they are in the United States somewhere that is inordinately populated with camels and sand. The models do some sightseeing and appear genuinely excited to be there.
This just in. Brittani works at a bar back home in PA where she proudly displays the skin of snakes that she’s killed and cooked for dinner. No surprises there.
Later in the day, the girls enjoy a traditional Moroccan lunch that would leave me shitting in my drawers for days. We’re ten minutes into this and all it has been so far is Brittani rambling about living in a trailer and Kasia talking about how even though she’s fat, she wants to win. I wonder who the bottom two will be.
There’s some nonsense that occurs with modeling a couture Moroccan design for Andre Leon Talley and none of the dresses fit Kasia. That sucks. Good thing she’s in Morocco so she can get the runs for a few days and shed some pounds. Not that she needs to but homeslice is on a modeling show full of stick insects who make Gumby look obese. So no winner was announced. The hell? Molly is getting irritated because she can’t be bothered to compete on this show, model, or take in the culture. Bitch just wants to sleep. Bitch can sleep in her Mainstays Walmart sheets twin bed back home. For now, she should go ride a camel and get the fuck over it.
Gasmii, the model house in Morocco is nicer than their tacky pad in California. It’s super exotic and Pier 1-esque if Pier 1 was full of legit international things and beautiful tiling instead of overpriced, over glue-gunned tschotskes.
Tyra mail has the word hump in it so either these bitches are getting gang-banged by Nigel and the Jays or riding a camel for some pictures. Probably the latter despite much protesting from Nigel. Jay informs the girls that camels can be pissy twats and appears to have found the angriest camel in all the land. I can’t wait for one of the models to fall or get spit on by this nasty camel bitch. Once again a drama free photo shoot so and I’m so ready for this season to end. Check back in a few days for the full recap and to see who stays in the harem another day.