Again, the Red team gets a 10 minute head start. They throw on their waders and GO! The squid ink proves to be the most difficult to procure and therefore is worth the most Euros.
The Black team finally arrives (Nookie in pre-cardiac arrest mode) and – miracle of miracles – Avery is from Alaska and spent her youth shucking fish rather than learning playground insults. Take note, Chaz! Sure enough, Chaz sucks (!) at filleting the monkfish, while former Barcelonian Nookie is killin’ it. The jokes write themsel…ah, never mind.
Chev/Kev/Gollum takes note of Chaz’s skillz and is already planning on throwing him under the proverbial bus. How about throwing him on top of the proverbial teleferrico de montjuic?
The Nooks is using his Barcelonian skills, giving the fish the what for – while Chaz turns his fish into mush. Needless to say, “Nookie rules, Chaz droolz!”
I see you back there, Chaz! You drool!
In the end, it comes down to the squid ink which means the Red team wins. The E.I. this week is the Gamba Roja – jumbo red shrimp which is a Catalonian delicacy. Each team is given their money they made and head off to the market place to buy their supplies. I’m actually amazed they didn’t set up a Whole Foods stand and force them to buy everything there. Bravo, always keepin’ it real!
The Red team is already bickering over the menu. Chev/Kev/Gollum pushes the team to find a particular type of sherry and Chaz just about loses it. Can we jettison both of these doofs?
The good news for the Black team is that Nookie has a good sense of what the menu should look like and knows his way around the market. Nookie may not be able to run too quick but you want him in a marketplace and a casino.
He specializes in paella and Texas Hold ‘Em
The teams are now hanging around the pool, drinking wine. Backstory time! Avery has two daughters who she misses very much. They are a very cute family.
Chaz won a silver medal in the Junior Olympics! Well, good for him. I guess. Nicole tells Jenna she has a loud voice which is code, of course, for shut the hell up. Jenna just laughs it off. Self-awareness, Jenna – you need some.
Jenna decides this is a good time to suggest an alliance, but Nicole isn’t interested. She says she will take care of herself and Jenna should do the same. Ya burnt, Jenna! Again.
Gary agrees with me
Chev/Kev/Gollum continues to be delusional by claiming that “people trust and rely on me.” And to make this clear, Nick calls him out for not listening to others.
The next day they arrive at the restaurant that will host the challenge. It’s a really pretty space that should inform the presentation of their dishes.
How many Bravo fans are going to try and crash this place now? Oh well, no such thing as bad publicity…
Each team will serve 3 dishes in tandem side by side. Chev/Kev/Gollum is doing front of house for the Red team. This has to be a strategy to get rid of him, right? Why else would they let him around people? His newest claim is that he “will be embraced by the people of Spain.” He says all these things with such seriousness, it’s a little sad. Just because you say it, doesn’t make it true.
Jenna is front of house for the Black team, which makes a bit more sense. A very little bit. She begins to quiz the other members of the team on what they are cooking. Liz is doing the dessert, while Nookie claims to be their team Exceptional Ingredient. He is also not happy that Jenna isn’t helping prep or prepare food at all.
Chev/Kev/Gollum now makes a holocaust joke regarding the fish. SILENCE. He then says it’s ok to make a holocaust joke because he’s Jewish. AAAAAH!!! And WTF? The jokes are no longer writing themselves, folks. Sorry.