Auditiongasm Finals 2012: Long Island Medium: Fighter One

After the radio show (or so editing leads us to think – I love reality TV time), Theresa goes to the tattoo parlor where her husband is getting a koi fish tattooed onto his arm. Then the dramatic music starts to let us know that she is about to hear from a spirit. She feels like she’s choking and it’s getting very hot in the room. That’s when Theresa finds a Ouija board (which I’m sure wasn’t conveniently placed by the producers). She tells us that they are real and that it’s not as safe as the protected channeling that she does. Way to put us all in danger, Parker Brothers! It’s like Theresa is a spiritual condom keeping us all safe!

Theresa decides to wave some burning sage around the tattoo parlor in order to cleanse it. Why the hell is she carrying around sage with her? Is it just hanging in her car like an air freshener? She mentions that the people in the tattoo parlor are giving her weird looks because she’s waving around a sage stick. Theresa, maybe they’re just looking at you funny because you randomly have a sage stick with you! Theresa gets nervous again. She is having anxiety because she is starting to pick up a spirit. I have issues with anxiety myself. I don’t get a TV show and a two year waiting list for appointments. I just get insomnia and Ativan. 

She asks whose father just died. Alana (a woman in the shop) just lost her father. Theresa asks if Alana has a tattoo. Wow. Who would be able to guess that a woman in a tattoo shop has a tattoo? Then Theresa says that it’s a tattoo for her father and that is correct. She then asks if Alana had a dream about her father last night. She did either last night or the night before (she can’t remember for sure). Theresa tells Alana that the dream was her father visiting her. This is another rather easy one to guess. If my father had just died, I’d probably be thinking about him a lot and some of those thoughts would probably result in dreams about him. Theresa asks Alana who she is upset with and then tells her that her father wants her to just let it go. Alana admits that she and her father got into a fight the night he died. They were both angry when they went to bed and he died of a massive heart attack that night.  Her father just wants her to let go of that anger.

 The episode ends rather abruptly after this reading. Larry’s koi fish is done. It’s a good thing Theresa came along for support and then didn’t even bother to, you know, support her husband who asked her to come along. She tells us that it was a good day because her husband got a new tattoo and a few people (or, you know, just that one girl) got readings!

So what are your thoughts? Can you handle any more shows about Italian stereotypes in this area of the world? Could Larry have picked out a more generic tattoo design? Does the thought of Theresa being dipped in Jell-O kill your appetite? These are the important questions, people!

Until next time…

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