Broadway Keeps It Gay

52 Comments

1. 1
   J-Unit
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 10:32 am

   Hugh Jackman might be the first in a long time to garner consideration for the Triple Crown of acting performance awards – The Oscars, The Tonys, and the Daytime Emmys.

2. 2
   bside
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 10:52 am

   Wow, this is the first time I actually regret missing The Tonys.

3. 3
   Ray Lavoie
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 12:59 pm

   You got everything perfect, right down to the Aussie thing. If I had one bit of wit that you might of left out, I would have written it here. Thanks for the recap.

4. 4
   gina
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 2:15 pm

   no comment on the ‘Assassins’ number?

5. 5
   R.Harman
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 2:59 pm

   I enjoyed the Tonys but it is clear that some of the prizes granted were for political reasons.I do agree that Tonya Pinkins and Mary J. Blige sang off pitch and sounded like they were having vocal difficulties.

   I particularly enjoyed the scene from”Big River” where they briefly showed the deaf chorus signing.It looked beaurifully graceful to me.

6. 6
   Peter
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 3:20 pm

   Thanks for the update. I watched Edie Falco and a couple of other Tonys on HBO instead.

7. 7
   eddie
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 4:27 pm

   FYI – Peter – they have Sopranos coveragehere too. how long has tvgasm been around? it’s awesome. is it a gawker site?

8. 8
   michael
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 4:52 pm

   I think a queen as James bond would add a whole new twist to the overdone 007 cunt-adoring epic. Bring on Hugh…let get it on with a hunk-a-burnin’love!

9. 9
   dbcowboy
   Posted June 7, 2004 at 4:55 pm

   My partner and I made almost all the comments you did about each section. Especially the awful singing! I know that most of them could do better. If I ever hear that rendition of “What I did for love” again, though, I will slit my wrists. I love that song, and the arrangement must’ve been done by a butcher.

   Other than that, it was a good thing Assassins was considered a revival. If it hadn’t been, Avenue Q might not have done so well, Assassins being a Sondheim musical.

10. 10
    Mick
    Posted June 7, 2004 at 6:32 pm

    What??? Hugh Jackman GAY??? OMG! and all of us here in Oz thought she…I mean he…was a wonderful, devoted husband. However, it appears that’s what Miz J is looking for! You could knock us down with an eyebrow pencil, that’s how shocked we are. I mean, he plays Peter Allen, who as we all know was married to…Mrs Gest? That **must** make him straight…..

    So….is it “Hugh Jackman”…or “Huge Act-man”…..?

11. 11
    ladyumah
    Posted June 7, 2004 at 7:56 pm

    you basically nailed it. my biggest belly laugh of the night was p rashad’s speech. she was channeling anne baxter as eve harrington at the sarah siddons awards. but baxter was more subtle. i’ll never get the vomit out of my carpet. phylicia you owe me a new rug!

12. 12
    Mav
    Posted June 7, 2004 at 11:48 pm

    Hugh would make a brilliant James Bond. I think it’s a talented man who can play Wolverine & Peter Allen. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen an actor who could sing, dance & act…maybe Gene Kelly? Sit back over the next 5 years and see what he achieves! He would be great in Guys & Dolls…but I await news of 007.

13. 13
    KH
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 12:11 am

    I do think the leaving out the gasp of correct yet unconvincing shock when Harvey (it’s safe to like that fag ’cause he’s sexless) Fierstein said they should move the production of “Assassins” to Washington D.C. is something of an oversight. For the Tonys, that’s practically edgy! As was leaving out the cooly sarcastic reaction shots of predetermined Tony shut out Boy George, who proves that naive two chord songs from a musical illiterate can surpass the yell “singing” bombast of “real” songwriters (“Wicked” anyone?) anytime, anyplace. And I hope you were joking about those nauseatingly talent free puppet moments.

14. 14
    James
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 6:45 am

    Jackman can be a worst ham. And high-kicks or not, his performance as Peter Allen comes off as a cringe-making heterosexual impression of Allen’s effortless camp panache…especially for anyone who saw Allen at his Broadway peak in Up In One. It’s a horrible piece of miscasting. However, put Jackman in a straight forward leading man role, such as Sunset Boulevard, which he played in Oz, and he’s perfect. As an aside, a backstage queen from Sunset Boulevard told me that every man, woman and dog involved in the show had fallen head over heels in love with him. To repeat the street talk: apparently he’s a very nice man.

15. 15
    M
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 7:52 am

    Ahh…but you forgot the most important part of P. Diddy’s time on stage – how horribly he butchered the names of not one (Michael Cerveris) but TWO (Raul Esparza) Tony nominees. And that would be why Michael got up there and called him Puff. But I’m sure Mr. Combs didn’t get the joke….

16. 16
    Frank
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 1:31 pm

    Whoever you are, I love you.

17. 17
    Miles
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 2:52 pm

    I have incredible respect for whoever wrote this, since many of these thoughts were running through my head while I was subjecting myself to watching it. Kudos to you!

18. 18
    madlibrarian
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 3:25 pm

    You left out how Sarah Jessica Parker’s stylists seemed to operate under the mistaken impression that she is J Lo. Onward and upward with The Arts!

19. 19
    BGH
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 3:35 pm

    You asshole! Although this is probably the funniest Tony review I have ever read and Idina and Caroline did sing flat, you had no right to make some of these comments. They were just catty and obnoxious and Hugh Jackman is not gay. I am a Broadway-obsessed freak and I think that you are just an uncultured homophobe who’s anti-Broadway and likes to show it by posting obnoxious reviews. If you hate Broadway so much, why’s you watch the awards?

20. 20
    Esma
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 3:36 pm

    T0 the person that wrote this, why are you such a bitch?

21. 21
    m_ruv
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 4:02 pm

    Dearest BGH,

    I AM gay, I love theater, and hell I’ve even seen most of the shows that were up for awards. You ever heard of tongue-in-cheek snarkiness? cattiness? It’s a STAPLE OF GAYDOM for god’s sake! It gets boring if you focus only on the good; that’s what recaps from the AP and NYTimes are for.

22. 22
    Leeks
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 4:07 pm

    Are you kidding me? The guy who wrote this is a bigger queen than any of you theatre fags out there.

23. 23
    Neil
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 4:12 pm

    Sheer Brillance.

24. 24
    b-side
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 5:03 pm

    If m-ruv were any gayer, he’d have to have his own float at the Pride parade.

    Dammit. I just can’t compete with the snarkiness on this page.

    I’m going back to the reality tv section.

25. 25
    Lauren
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 5:03 pm

    While the show had it’s ups and downs it is in no way deserving of the crap posted on this website. It makes me sick the way some people think of the theatre community. Why sit and watch the Tony’s if that’s what it’s all about. Some people are so damn willingly ignorant.

26. 26
    Lynn
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 8:00 pm

    Hugh Jackman is NOT gay!!! I will be so glad when

    Hugh’s portrayal of Peter Allen is done on Sept.

    12 so ignorant people will stop making this

    “gay” association just because he is playing a

    gay man on Broadway. Hugh is a VERY versatile

    actor and is a strong candidate to play James Bond. However, I feel that he is really

    too good of an actor to seriously consider accepting the role of 007.

27. 27
    Eric
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 8:08 pm

    You got one thing wrong: Carol Channing is 9000 years old. I’ve counted the rings.

28. 28
    Irene
    Posted June 8, 2004 at 10:55 pm

    This past Sunday was the first time in maybe twenty years that I did not watch the Tonys with my winged monkeys at my side. I was so missing their sharp, witty comments, and then one of them sent me this via e-mail…brilliant! Hysterical! (In fact…I’m kind of thinking my friend TOm wrote the review..only he’s a little meaner!) As for Hugh Jackman…he’s wonderful and talented and hot, whatever his persuasion..and don’t you all know that EVERY gay man accuses every straight man of being gay? It don’t mean a thing, so lighten up, everybody..he can still be James Bond!

29. 29
    Ben
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 12:40 am

    Whoever is behind this website is seriously gifted! I can’t tell you what a welcome break this was from all the other drivel I’ve had to read before and after the Tony’s. When’s YOUR racy new musical due?

30. 30
    Michele
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 7:10 am

    I’m one of the low lifes who missed this year. The Tony’s, that is. But luckily I was made privvy to this startling re-cap, which like the Enterprise, has gone where no man has gone before. Uffda, as we say in Minnesota–pretty acidic but scathingly funny commentary. Of couse the author of this must look like Brad Pitt, posess the acting ability of a young Lawrence Olivier, sing (on tune, a’course)like The Three Mo’ Tenors combined and dance like Gene Kelly . . . right? Dude, you must be all that to cold dis people in this wildly carefree fashion. Hope you get the chance to strut your stuff for the rest us sometime soon. Oy Vey.

31. 31
    Sharon
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 7:32 am

    I was glad that Avenue Q won . It is unique and very cleverly written. As for Hugh WHO CARES??? But I do not think he’s gay; as Irene says all gay men want him to be. Stop stressing!

32. 32
    noah
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 9:32 am

    Seeing Carol Channing on stage in those heels was the most exciting moment on television I’ve ever seen. She looked so brittle and fragile. You weren’t watching a Tony presenter.. you were watching a woman fight for her life.

33. 33
    J.W.
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 10:45 am

    Brilliant! I sat and laughed out loud!

34. 34
    jash
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 11:59 am

    WTF? this was obviously written by a total lame-O. reading the comments, i feel like everyone is taking CRAZY PILLS!

35. 35
    Fine
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 12:49 pm

    Maybe you didn’t know who he was, but I think it was an oversight not to mention David Richenthal’s (producer of I Am My Own Wife) rambling, crazed rant about what? — gay marriages? good theatre? — which completely sucked the life out of the award for Best New Play.

36. 36
    Evan
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 2:11 pm

    Understanding that most of this review, if not all, was done with a tongue-in-cheek attitude. . . i will not discuss it because some of the comments were funny and Carole Channing scares the CRAP out of me. However, to whoever commented that Hugh was horrible playing Peter Allen. . . no I cannot say I ever saw Peter Allen perform; I wish I had. But I will say that I saw Boy from Oz and he was absolutely magnificent – no he does not sound exactly like Peter but he doesn’t have to. . . he moves about the stage with such grace and ad-libs with the audience so effortly that you are convinced, even if just for those two hours, that he IS Peter Allen. . . either way – I have to give my cheers for the gay puppets heh -

37. 37
    xena
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 2:21 pm

    I agree with Jash. Whoever wrote this has to just relax. If you’re so good at it, why don’t you be on an awards show. Whatever. I bet you’r ejust a jerk who walks around elbowing people out of your way.

38. 38
    Elle
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 3:25 pm

    I do admit that Idina, though not flat, was having some quality issues with her voice, I still gotta defend her because this role has taken her voice to new heights since they made her butcher it in the teeny bopper crapfest “Rent.” she has to do this 8 other times a week, and one performance at an awards show doesn’t take away how talented you are. And now she has the trophy to prove it. As for gasping, she was just excited, breathing probalby wasn’t the first thing on her mind when she got up to the podium. I also think the look on Taye’s face when she won was one of the most heartwarming things i’d seen in awhile on tv. He was truly proud of her.

39. 39
    bway
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 5:14 pm

    fucking hysterical!

40. 40
    katherine
    Posted June 9, 2004 at 6:24 pm

    Fabulous, darling, fabulous. Three cheers for the wonderful “Q” puppets… any musical with lyrics like, “Me up all night honking me horn to porn, porn, porn”.. well, that’s a winner in my book. Incidentally, to those of you bitching this guy out, please realize that a STAPLE of the theatre scene is the ability to make witty, catty comebacks at a moment’s notice; it’s tradition, it’s entertainment, and most of all, it’s fun.

41. 41
    H.R.H. Platz
    Posted June 10, 2004 at 11:15 am

    As one not able to abide the duration of the festivities, I do agree whole-heartedly with the assessment of the portions which I did see, especially the appalling singing in the so-called aria from “Caroline, or Change.” If Ms. Pinkins wants any kind of longevity, she had better learn what bel canto means straight away.

42. 42
    xena
    Posted June 10, 2004 at 11:49 am

    Finally, the bel canto dis we’ve been waiting for.

43. 43
    PlayBill
    Posted June 10, 2004 at 1:12 pm

    This is the bitchiest, nastiest, snarkiest thing I’ve ever seen on the web and I LOVE IT!

    Almost as much as I loved the Avenue Q upset. All I have to add is, if you thought Tonya’s number from Caroline sucked, just imagine how tiresome the whole damn show is! Ms. Pinkins might have had better help from her songwriters – if you can call them that. I know a lot of people think this is Important Theatre, but I thought it was pretensious, arty and awful. I’m really glad the Tony voters decided to recognize what really was the better book and score.

44. 44
    JD
    Posted June 10, 2004 at 1:13 pm

    banned

45. 45
    Chantooz
    Posted June 11, 2004 at 7:11 am

    Whoever you are, you are a brilliant humorist. Kudos for impaling the balloons of the puffed up on the hatpin of humor. Please alert me when you………pierce, poke and play again…….Chantooz

46. 46
    joanna louise
    Posted June 11, 2004 at 8:37 am

    OH GOOD GOD !!! YOU HAVE IT SPOT ON.I BELLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD.THANKS FOR EXPRESSING WHAT ALL OF US WERE THINKING ONLY FAR MORE ELIQUANTLY , WITH ABSLOUTE ATTENTION TO THE EAR PIERCING ,EYE BORW RAISING , SHINANIGANS OF THE WHOLE AFFAIR WITH FABULOUS COMIC FLAIR…BRAVO!!

47. 47
    Luisa
    Posted June 11, 2004 at 2:09 pm

    Oh, my god.

    This was the funniest thing that I have read in AGES.

    I enjoy satire far too much for my own good.

    Whoever you are…you rock. So much.

48. 48
    Anne McNeff
    Posted June 11, 2004 at 2:49 pm

    First time on this sight, and I LOVE it…..

49. 49
    Jonesy
    Posted June 15, 2004 at 5:56 pm

    OMG! Anika Noni Rose (Best Featured Actress in a Musical) was in “From Justin to Kelly”… I’m sorry, I just had to tell someone. Heh.

    Loved the rest of the snark, btw. (Although, please, don’t fault Benicio. He can’t help it if teenage skanks fantasize about balling him in elevators. I’ve got ten years on Scarlett “The Harlot” and I wanna do that to him, too!)

50. 50
    dragynlady
    Posted June 18, 2004 at 9:55 am

    I didn’t see the Tony’s this year, I guess I didn’t miss much. BTW, why DO gay men always think straight guys are gay? Is it just wishful thinking, or sour grapes? Lol.

51. 51
    Allison Miller
    Posted June 21, 2004 at 1:58 pm

    I must respond to this review. I totally agree with almost 90% of what you say. I loved the opening number. I was totally disappointed in Tonya Pinkins. VERY BAD AND EMBARRASSING. Idina Menzel was not the best either but she is was fabulous in the show. Stuff happens. No one is perfect. We got to understand this is not a cd where they can change and correct notes. It is live theatre. That is the chance the actors and we take as the audience. Give them a break. Plus, I heard Tonya was sick before she went on . I felt Anki Noni, Audra and Phylicia’s speeches were all beautiful. It was a great night for women especially. Mary J. Blige, I love ya but you were aweful! This whole thing with hip-hop/rappers coming to Broadway worries me totally. Some stuff and people was useles but on the whole it was good to see the underdogs win.

52. 52
    theatrekid
    Posted June 27, 2004 at 10:45 am

    am i the only one in the world that wanted wicked to win best musical? kristin chenoweth is my favorite person in the world.