Hola, Gasmi! We’re back at the pad, ready for a giant mess of an episode. there is A LOT of filler in this episode, we have never heard Chris Harrison speak so slowly and use the same words over and over. Why does ABC insist on 2 hours?
We start right after the last rose ceremony and all the contestants can only talk about Rachel and her desire to leave. Rachel answers them, “I don’t want y’all to think I don’t want to be here.” Ok, well maybe if you stop telling people you want to leave, people might believe you. Nick speaks! And he wants to take charge of the partnership. Where has this Nick been all this time?
The next morning, Chris Harrison explains that the winners of today’s challenge will NOT get roses but they do get to send one couple home immediately. Tony tells us that this is a total “game changer.” Thank you, Captain Obvious.
The challenge? 1 team member sits on a plank above a pool while the other team member sits and answers Bachelor Pad trivia. Every wrong answer gets a rope cut; 3 wrong answers and their partner is hanging from a bar with their arms. Each team has a quick convo about who is doing what. Rachel decides that Nick should answer the questions…foreshadowing to later bad decisions?
A new take on planking
And speaking of bad decisions, WHAT is Ed wearing? Shorts from a 1970′s gym class?
Sarah rocks the contest, she is apparently some sort of Bachelor Pad trivia savant…we couldn’t be more sad for her. But she and Chris ar very happy that they have won again. Tony and Blakeley are terrified that they are about to be sent home. We can’t understand why…Blakeley only takes every opportunity to call Chris every name in the book.
The producers made Chris and Sarah act like they were contemplating their decision. They all get lined up and Chris gets to unload his frustrations on each couple, this is really all he wanted to do. Forget the $250,000, he just wanted to tell everyone off.
Chris announces that although, everyone sucks, Tony and Blakeley are going home. SHOCKER!
Blakeley bursts into tears- DOUBLE SHOCKER!
It’s ok, Blakeley- we’re happy you’re leaving…
It’s time to say good-bye and Blakeley is now heaving the ugly cries. They get in the same limo and drive away together. Now we get to hear all the icky sweet sentiment about how love means more than money, blah, blah, blah. Drive away, please.
The house is in emotional turmoil now.
Oh, wait, that’s just Ed in turmoil. He’s a big girl, folks.
Ed stops crying and says ” I hope we get some down time now.” He should know not to say things out loud in the Bachelor Pad because Chris walks in and says “the next challenge starts now!”
The contestants all are driving around Hollywood and end up at the Hollywood Palladium. They are immediately met by a band playing. What song you may ask? Why it’s Sister Christian by Night Ranger!!! LIVE!!! Well, semi- live because it sounds really good. Digitally remastered good. No way Night Ranger sounds the same 30 years later. Ed says he runs to this song, and the rest say they LOVE it as well. Ummhmmm and they are all how old again? Chris tells them the challenge is to sing Sister Christian in front of a live audience with the band and the judges will be Night Ranger themselves. Each team does get a vocal coach, how nice of ABC. Don’t get too excited though, all 3 are from GLEE so how good can they be?
MOTORING La la la la la!!!!!
They all arrive the next day to their GLEE coaches hoping for a miracle. Frankly, we do too. Sarah brags to the camera how great a singer she is in the shower and car. We notice these are both places nobody can hear her. Probably a good idea. Chris admits that Sarah can’t sing “there’s bad and then there’s Sarah.” Rachel and Nick are trying to figure out what the hell this song is about. We have been asking that question for years now! Usually after a night of drinking and trying to be philosophical.
The night of the performance arrives and the contestants are all very nervous. They attempt to get dressed in their 80′s gear to look legit.
I hope this is waterproof!
First up is Rachel and Nick. Rachel looks awesome! Totally sounds horrible but looks awesome!