Bad Girls Club: On The Rocks

The calm before the storm.

Doesn’t Esther look almost innocent when not insane? Esther goes looking through the house because she seems to have lost her wallet. What I am wondering is why she is so calm? She tells us she doesn’t misplace her money. Still she is calm.

Later while talking to Strawhead she says unless money got legs somebody done stole it. They wonder if perhaps it was that troll that is Trigger’s girlfriend/boyfriend/whatever.

Esther tells us that she is really really butt hurt that somebody in this house would touch something personal of hers.

Butt Hurter suspects.

As Strawhead tells us, someone stole that money because a stripper NEVER loses her money.

Switch over to Bleach Blondie and Lea having some tense moments while getting ready to go get Lea another piercing.Like Lea or any other one of these twits need another hole.  Lea is ready to go and BB makes the comment that Lea is impatient and overly defensive. So far everyone is smiling. But tensions are brewing and I wish they would stop with all this filler and just get to it already!

Sorry, small rant. Cherie had a 17 month old to chase after all weak and I’m a lil’ cranky. Well a lil’ more than usual. Here’s a tip, don’t give a 17 month old a wooden spoon and then be surprised when he smacks you in the tater. (Love you Leo!)

It never sleeeeeeeepsssssssssssss!

Anyhoodles, Esther and Trigger are tagging along to the tatt shop as well. At said tatt shop Lea is drinking hard. And then I see why.

So tracheotomies are all the rage now?

Seriously? WTF is wrong with this girl? Well aside from the obvious. Call me old fashioned but I just don’t trust a complete stranger to stab me in the neck!

Lea is thrilled with her new piercing and I’m thinking she should have just had one of those web cam thing’s installed like barbie has now. Looks the same. Twit.

Outside the tatt shop more tensions build as Lea wants to hang with her friend and everyone else wants to leave. The others go get the car and Bleach Barbie tells us that Lea is being inconsiderate and a diva and no one tells “Kristin” to wait. Uhhh, she did and you are. Dingbat.

In the car Esther asks Alligator Face, I mean Trigger if she can spot her some money so she can eat. Trigger is not happy with that idea and when Lea finally piles her ass into the car they decide to just go home and eat.

Back at home, Esther has a heart to heart with Strawhead about her temper. She knows she needs to change or she will end up in jail.

That bitch said what?

A little later the phone rings and Lea answers. It’s a friend of Esther’s. Lea tells all her business and Esther’s supposed friend tells Lea everything Esther has said about her. Like how she has changed and turned into Bleach Barbie’s clone. To say the least, Lea is PISSED.

Lea waits at the top of the stairs and announces that she is no different than when she walked through the door and it seems that the other girls talk about her behind her back. Erica, who isn’t asleep or fucking for once lets Lea know she doesn’t think about her ass at all.

Esther is all “ok”. And BB tells us that she actually agrees with what Esther has said but she likes Lea so who cares?

Vaginal dryness is a painful problem.

Lea keeps ranting about facts and crap and blah blah blech. Then tells us no one fucks with Lea cause they will get fucked. Duh, is there anything you haven’t fucked?

Later, Strawhead is on the phone and laughing her ass off. This is a good thing right? WRONG! For some reason her happiness has pissed Trigger off. Trigger hoofs it outside to bitch to Esther about how before she and Strawhead came into the house they promised to have each others backs.

Happy people piss me off too.

Trigger goes on to tell Esther that when the Clones were dousing her with every liquid in the house, Strawhead walked away and if she had been a real Bag Girl she would have stood up for her. She thinks she’s a fake and a follower. Could someone start actually fighting please?

Ha! What does Esther do? First chance she gets she runs and tells Strawhead what Trigger said.

Esther has lost entirely too much weight.

Next on the phone is Bleach Blondie and she’s talking to her BFF Sean who is coming to visit. Didn’t he visit last week? Anyway she tells him they are going to hang out at the gay beach all day and then go to a gay club that night.

They’re gonna have a gay old time!

Lea tells us she is so excited that Sean is coming. Only she says it in a smart ass “I’d rather eat shit” way. Sean arrives and the first words I hear him speak are “I want a penis in my face.”

Try yoga.

Sean gives BB some kind of necklace that makes her happy and then Lea tells us that she is supposed to go to the gay beach with them but isn’t feeling well and doesn’t want to go. Funny how this “unwell” feeling came along when Sean arrived.

Lea finally tells them she is not going and BB gets pissed and tells us that her friend is only there for a few days and she should support her. Off to the gay beach they go. Looking for Jewish men. Seriously. And BB is wearing high heels on the beach.

Bitch, you could be wearing stilts and NO DUDE WILL CARE. GAY BEACH!

As they are having a fun old time at the beach, back at the house Strawhead confronts Trigger about saying she isn’t a Bad Girl. Trigger tries to say she didn’t mean it in a bad way. Ok. Finally Strawhead walks off. zzzzzzzzzzzz

Trigger puts 2 & 2 together and realizes that Esther ratted her out. She thinks that Strawhead and Esther are working together and she KNOWS that Esther is a snitch. Here’s my problem. If you won’t say something to someone else’s face do not say it behind their backs. It will bite you in the ass and it’s trashy. Oh wait, I forgot who I was talking about.

Oh Lord, Esther is on the phone making calls to her “Sugar Daddies”. Wait, I gagged a little. She still hasn’t found her money so she has gotten out her client, I mean “friend” book and is calling around asking for money.

Remember me? I’m the one who stole your watch, oh I mean gave you a lap dance.

We move on to Sugar Daddy number 2. Then 3. Who by the way, isn’t home and we know this because his MOMMY answered the phone. What kind of Sugar Daddy lives with his Mom? By the time we get to #4 Esther asks him if she can “borrow” $100 until Friday. His response……………

Who is this?

I cannot help but laugh. It’s not clear whether any of them offered her money but I somehow seriously doubt it.

Everyone except Erica and Trigger are going out. BB and Sean to a gay club and then they will meet up with the others at another club later. At least that was the plan. In the limo Sean is shitfaced and just keeps repeating “Get yo balls out my face. Get out my face” while laughing.  The others look on in silence.

Lea as usual is trying to control the situation and tries to talk BB and Sean into just skipping the gay club and coming to Transit with them. Which by the way they went past the gay club on their way to Transit and it makes no sense. And BB is pissed off.

At Transit BB lets Sean know how pissed she is. At first Sean tries to calm her and then he jumps on the pissed off wagon.

So go. Ever hear of a taxi? Or stealing the damn limo?

Finally some action.

Go smack a bitch!!!

Then BB says this stupid shit.

I was until you stopped Sean’s freak out!

Yeah looks like they are having tons of fun. Ugh. Meanwhile Lea is up near the stage smiling and actually having fun which is pissing Esther and BB off. And they bond over it. BB tells Esther that she feels like Lea has changed and is fake and is dicking her around. I am so tired of these bitches “feelings”.

Back at the house Esther calls her Mom to bitch about Lea’s fakeness yet again and Mom is sick of it and blah blah zzzzzzzz. Oh hell, she tells her Mom that what she’s concerned about is that she has this gut feeling that she and Lea are gonna fight. She says she doesn’t want to go home and she doesn’t want to to jail.

Mom’s advice is to play it out and then “whip that bitches ass and go home.” Hahahahaha, I like Mom. Esther tells us that at this point if she is leaving, she’s leaving with Lea’s blood on her hands.

I see stripes in this bitches future. And bars.

Meanwhile out in the pool the others are talking about Esther. Trigger has this to say…

Bitch, if you could eat yourself you’d never leave home.

The talk is all about Esther and BB tells the girls that Esther owes Lea around $600. Later they move to the hot tub but the talk is still on Esther. Only Strawhead seems to be defending Esther and says that when she drank her booze, Esther replaced it.

An actual witches brew.

The next morning Strawhead runs and tells Esther what all was said the night before. She does this because she’s a snitch and also because Esther came to her when Trigger was talking shit about her and she wanted to return the favor. The only problem is that Strawhead tells Esther that Lea said she owed her $600. Lea didn’t say that. Bleach Barbie did.

Later Sean leaves. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Dude, you need to get out more.

Later we see Trigger sunning herself.

Seriously girl you need to moisturize!

Esther asks Lea if she thinks she owes her money and Lea says no. Lea gets a little defensive though and Esther says she was just asking. Lea tells us that it’s funny that Esther asked her about that because if she is gonna talk shit about someone she does it to their face. Not exactly true but whateves.

In the kitchen Esther fuse is burning as she tells Erica that she knows Lea said she owes her $600. She won’t tell her how she knows but she knows. Then Esther goes off on a rant about how she doesn’t need no one in that house and she’s “gonna be me .”

Later that night the twits are getting ready for Esther’s stripper friends to visit.

Oh shit I almost just choked on my M&M at the word “colleagues”.

Esther goes to introduce her “colleagues” to Erica and her big ass.

Well that’s one way to say hello.

BB tells us that tonight they are all going to Heathrow, except for Erica who is staying home as usual.

In case you missed him, Adrian is under Erica’s big ass somewhere.

Off to the club. Drinky drinky happy happy. Esther has a pole and she’s working it. Then we see this…

Yes Esther’s ass is in the air and I do believe Trigger is munching it.

Bleach Barbie’s response…

Right there with ya!

As BB tries not to puke, me as well, she screams “What the fuck was that?” It was gross is what it was. BB tells us this is a CLUB not a STRIP CLUB. Then this shit starts. Esther leans over to Lea and says….

Uh oh.

Double uh oh.

Esther tells us she is fed up with this fake bullshit. They pile into the limo and start arguing immediately. You don’t have my back. No you don’t have mine. You threw me under the bus. You are fake. Sigh.

Looks like another one of Lea’s holes is infected.

Back at the house Esther mutters that she is gonna murder that bitch. Trigger seems to confused as to why Esther is losing her shit. Esther starts yelling that she is the baddest bad girl in the house. Her stripper friend tries to calm her down but since Esther is pulling her hair back I know some shit is about to fly.

Let the crazy shit begin!

It’s the same freakin argument about Lea saying Esther owes her $600. Lea swears on her Mom who is tattooed on her arm that she never said that. I don’t see BB speaking up and admitting that she said that shit. BB is trying to keep Esther and Lea from fighting and all the while Lea is screaming that if she wants to fight they’ll fight.

Lea gets in Esther’s face and says that every time Esther gets a drink in her she gets crazy. True. Now they are screaming over each other with other people holding them back. LET THEM FIGHT!

Esther tells BB to remove herself in a rather polite way since later Lea actually throws BB out of the way. Lea and Esther are now holding each others arms and pushing each other around the room all the while screaming.

Lea walks away and Esther returns upstairs and both are bitching about each other and suddenly Esther loses it again and runs down to the kitchen.

Sheesh just let them fight!!!!

As BB tries to hold on to Esther, Esther starts throwing shit. I mean like crazy.

That’s gonna hurt.

Uh it’s gonna take more than that scrawny little dude to subdue that crazy bitch.

Everyone has lost their shit by now and as I suspected reinforcements were needed.

I bet that first production dude they sent in is curled in a ball somewhere.

While Lea is yelling a mile a minute to Trigger about the same old shit, Trigger is bleeding from stepping on glass.

Ouchy.

There’s blood drops all over the house and BB has an injury too. Meanwhile the big dudes are still trying to get Esther outside and in a car for a trip to a hotel for the night.

She better hope Esther didn’t bite her.

Lea tells us that Esther is all bark and no bite. What’s your version of bite? Throwing a stick of dynamite at you?

They finally drag Esther’s ass out to the car all the while she is screaming don’t touch me. She tells us she has been a ticking time bomb and she finally exploded. No shit.

The aftermath of Hurricane Esther……..

Damn, I hope nobody wanted a sammich.

Hell my kitchen looks like that now.

I think it’s time to say bye bye to Esther.

Later while everyone is trying to figure out what set Esther off Strawhead plays dumb and acts like she knows nothing. Trigger calls bullshit and Strawhead denies it. Strawhead is not fooling Trigger, she knows she’s the one who blabbed about what was said.

Then Lea wonders if anyone even actually stole Esther’s money and Trigger agrees. I do not. And it’s always the innocent looking ones.

Lea tells us that she isn’t going to forgive Esther because she doesn’t know how.

As everyone stands watch Esther returns. Before she can even get her shit out of the car Lea tells her she’s done. BB and Lea both tell her she’s gone. She ignores them and continues to bring her shit into the house. She tells us she blacked out and doesn’t remember anything. Excuse me a sec….hahahahaha!

La la la la la la la la!

BB and Lea follow Esther upstairs and tell her that she hurt and bloodied just about everyone in the house and Lea tells her if she wants to fight lets fight. Oy I am so tired of hearing this shit. She tells Esther she ain’t shit and blah blah blah. In the end Esther decides it’s best that she leaves.

After packing all her shit she takes it out to the car. She hugs everyone except Lea and BB. Then she walks up to Lea and everyone thinks she’s gonna sucker punch her.

You know she ain’t gonna do shit.

Lea asks her what she wants. Does she want to fight? What? BB is scared because she will have to get in between the two and she just knows that Esther is about to go crazy on Lea. Still she just stares.

After a montage of the good times they shared and a bunch of “Whatcha gonna do’s?” Esther says she knew it would come to this but its hard “because it’s you.”

Esther says she remembers the Lea she walked in with and Lea says she’s still the same. Esther says no she isn’t and then throws BB under the bus and says that even she has said Lea has changed. To her credit BB admits that she did say it.

In the end Esther tells us as bad as she wants to beat Lea’s ass, she can’t because she cares about her. Oh please. Seriously??? And she leaves. Strawhead is impressed and believes that maybe living in the BGC has changed Esther. Shut up twit.

As she drives away Lea yells that it doesn’t even make any sense and she would rather Esther had punched her. BB sits on the steps and cries.

By the way, the wallet thief………

Told ya.

She tells us she took it and planted it in Erica’s bed hoping that Esther would find it, go crazy and Erica would get kicked out of the house.

Until next time,

Love and Smooches,

Cherie