Get Out of My Head

BSG is back! I think this is the beginning of a series of mind-blowing episodes that we’re accustomed to from our favorite dysfunctional spaceship. When I first started watching BSG, Starbuck quickly became my favorite character. She is a natural, talented pilot — a little rough around the edges with loads of misplaced anger, emotional instability and an all around badass chick.

Her character has been developed so well that I actually became angry with her after all her douche-bag acts toward Anders, her marriage, and everyone else who got in her way. But hey, we all have bad days, right? I was so excited to see the Starbuck-centric episode – and I’ve been dying to know if her finger painting has to do with anything earthly. Let’s find out…
Before I move onto the recap, there are some cylon matters that need to be discussed. Through a very serious email discussion, all while procrastinating on company-time (why else have this discussion?), a friend and I discussed the growing complexity of the human-cylon models. It all started with a debate on whether Starbuck could be a cylon… so instead of paraphrasing our whole conversation, here’s the transcript…so much easier to cut and paste. We would love your thoughts on it…

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:00:30
Me: Good morning — I hope she’s not dead.

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:02:30
Friend: Thanks for ruining it, I fell asleep for the last ten minutes.

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:03:30
Me: oops. I mean she’s fine. Still insane though.

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:05:30
Friend: whatever.

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:07:30
Friend: You know what they’ve never really answered about the cylons? Do they age? Or when they created a model, they are as they are now. b/c for starbuck to be a cylon, they would have had to create her when she was a child, which wouldn’t really fit the timeline of when the human models were created? Unless, it’s all just false memories she has of being a child????

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:10:30
Me: oh yeah. because the only cylon that really had a past that we all kinda saw was
boomer. she also had childhood memories (fake), but was in the fleet for a while… so she must have aged some, bc. say she started in the army or flight school or whatever at 18 or 19, she had to age a little??? you know what i mean?? Because it seemed like she’s been part of the crew for a while… like think of how we looked
at 19, then 24 or 25. def. look different. but then, why wouldn’t there be a 40 yr-old Six, walking around w/ a 27 yr-old Six on the resurrection ship where there
are tons of models roaming around? Or do they all age together? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, very interesting!
Are you going to watch that pussycat doll show?

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:11:30
Friend: Hell yeah.

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:13:30
Me: I think I’ll bring this up in the recap… can I include our conversation? I’ll put you as “friend” unless you want a special name…

- On Mon, 5 Mar 2007 09:15:30
Friend: Well, I find it hard to believe you can’t come up with something more creative than “friend”…but, it will do.

Ok, the time stamps are wrong, but I thought it added a nice effect… gotta love work-procrastination conversations…

Anyway, we welcome all theories or details that we missed, which is definitely likely. All the various models appear to be the same age. Do they stay that way forever? We know that childhood memories were definitely implanted in Boomer, but how could there be sleeper cylons mixed in with humanity for years and years, yet the never age?? All the scenes on the resurrection ship however, have tons of the same models and they all appear to be the same age. Ok, ok, onto the show…

BSG opens with Starbuck having a sex/painting dream in her old apartment on Caprica…very kinky. I wasn’t too into it though, all I could think about was the nasty smell of paint – which is anything but an aphrodisiac for me… but the mate in question was none other than the psychotically-obsessed Leoben. Starbuck was focusing more on covering up her bulls-eye masterpiece, aka the symbol in the temple, aka storm cycle, aka childhood finger-painting, than on loving Leoben. A moaning Starbuck wakes up feeling sweaty and disoriented to find the ever-developing pervert of Galactica staring at her. Yup, Hot Dog will most likely be the first registered sex offender of the fleet.

Starbuck can’t sleep after her naughty dream and runs into Helo in the bathroom. Helo tries to give her some friendly advice and the name of Hera’s shrink… wait, Hera’s seeing a shrink??? How old is she — can she even talk yet or is she aging at the same speed of soap opera babies? I’d love to see one of those sessions.

Instead of going to a shrink, she heads to an oracle – or maybe they’re one in the same in the future. The oracle sees this special destiny in Starbuck. However Starbuck doesn’t look at it so much as a special destiny, more as a “world class frack-up”. Damn, she’s pretty hard on herself. The oracle continues and tells her that Leoben knows her better than she knows herself and he’s coming for her soon.

Also, she said that her abusive mom was trying to tell her a message, but she was mixing the message up with the messenger. So, conclusion: she got beat up by her mom and imprisoned by a crazy cylon for a reason, for her “destiny”. I’m hoping all this stuff will make sense to me by the end of the episode, but I doubt it.

She also gave Starbuck a figurine and told her that she’ll know what to do with it when the time comes. Huh??? Was that all supposed to be therapeutic? It seemed to make matters a little worse – I hope she didn’t pay for that session, but at least she got the cool figurine out of it. Final note: Starbuck’s path to her destiny sucks, not an easy “path”.

Over in Starbuck’s bunk, the post-coital pillow talk is in full swing. Sam is begging for some special time with his wife, or is it ex-wife? Estranged? Separated? Who knows with these two crazy kids. Starbuck said she’ll think about it. How sweet. Sam tells her that she was fracked up by her mom long before the whole Leoben/kidnapping thing. In Starbuck’s defense, I think anyone would be. Her Mom seemed like one of those extra-crazy show moms who never hugged her, belittled her, beat the frack out of her but always reminded her of her specialness and talent after the beating. We find out that she split her head open with a broom handle. Thanks Mom! And slammed her hand in door jams, repeatedly … now if that isn’t love, I don’t know what is, what parenting skills!

Although Starbuck is clearly losing it, she’s off on a mission for Day 4 of fleet refueling with Hot Dog. Starbuck sees a cylon raider in the clouds and chases it into a huge, hallucinogenic storm system. Soon Starbuck is hit and things aren’t looking good for our quirky heroine. Starbuck waits until the last minute to pull-out before she’d get “crushed like a cheap soda can” according to Col. Tigh. Don’t all soda cans crush pretty easily? Does it have to be cheap? Anyway, I digress, Starbuck was back safely on Galactica, yet there was nothing wrong with her viper and the tape showed no signs of a cylon. She is losing it. Fast.

Adama and Apollo wonder if she is emotionally fit for command, and the Admiral leaves it to Apollo to decide. Thanks Dad. They don’t even know the half of Starbuck’s insanity. Oh boy. After all, Starbuck is the best pilot they have, however she seems a little burned out (very nice way to put it). Can she handle it? Is the courageous Starbuck too rattled (delusional) for duty?

Over in a slightly morbid conversation, Apollo and Starbuck talk about where they want their pictures placed after they die. Knowing that your body is going out Airlock 10 may not be comforting, so finding a nice plot for your face in the hallway of death seems like something to look forward to. Starbuck wants to be placed next to Cat, how touching.

Lee wants to be placed next to Duck and Lara, whoever they are (good card players?), phew… glad we got that out of the way. Is this foreshadowing their untimely death? I hope not. But Starbuck sees the dreaded symbol in the candlewax and is shaken. On a side note, I like how we’re back to the old-season 1 banter between these two. Fighting, squabbling in a brother/sister kind of way, instead of the sexual tension we’ve had all this season.

Starbuck passes President Roslin and Adama in the hall. I guess this is what the oracle was talking about because Starbuck gave Adama the figurine for his model ship. It’s Arura, goddess of the dawn, symbolizing a fresh start. Uh, oh. Starbuck is making a few too many final arrangements and she keeps seeing her mini-me all over Galactica. Say it ain’t so BSG…

After flashes of her tiny self, her crazy mom, her bulls-eye finger painting and loads of cigarettes, Starbuck realizes she shouldn’t fly – she doesn’t trust herself, but Lee does, so off they go. Before they go on their mission, they have a conversation about Apollo’s marriage. Finally, there’s closure for the two and we’re back to the hot-shot problem pilot and the CAG. Yay! But all this closure and bleak foreshadowing doesn’t seem to bode well for Starbuck’s future.

Once in space, Starbuck spots a cylon raider… but is it real or just another figment of her fracked-up imagination? The Fleet is on Condition One – I have no idea what it means, but it sounds very, very serious. Starbuck’s not reporting and soon is hit, knocked unconscious and dreaming of her Caprican apartment.

She wakes to an alarm and Leoben — man this guy won’t get out of her head. He tells her she has to get ready for her “big day”. Starbuck tells him that she’s not really there, she’s unconscious.

She and Leoben are witnessing a conversation between her and her mom from six years ago. Starbuck is slated to be the first member of the family to become an officer and is the “best natural pilot” of the class. That’s not good enough for Mom however, because she is 16th in the class, not #1. Wow, tough crowd. Nothing like support from your mom! Her mom keeps telling that she’s special, and has a gift, blah, blah, blah… but then tells her she’s a quitter and sucks. It looks like Mom may be a little extra cranky today because she’s just been diagnosed with terminal cancer.

Starbuck is upset by this revelation and tries to reach out and hold her mom’s hand, but is coldly rebuffed. Damn, she is one cold beyach. With that, Starbuck leaves and threatens to never come back… a threat she kept. Leoben tells her that she waited five weeks for Starbuck to return, and she’s still waiting. Starbuck then enters her mother’s bedroom and sees a Starbuck-filled scrap book with her cute 5th grade picture, then… her popular finger-painted masterpiece. Dun, dun, dun…Starbuck tell her mom that she doesn’t know if she can do it… then things get freaky.

Do what? This is killing me – yet the reason why I love this show, suspense! Her mother reassures her, telling her that she can do it. What destiny is fulfilled by flying straight into a storm cloud?

Leoben tells her that there’s nothing terrible about death and she would be free now to become what she really is…huh? Starbuck says, “you’re not Leoben.” He never said he was… he’s just there to prepare her for the next storm and the space between life and death… uh, oh… is she going to crash on the LOST island??

Doubt it, but what is going on? Starbuck appears to fly into the storm cycle/temple symbol that her painting foreshadowed. Her viper is blown to bits. Did she eject or is this the end of Starbuck? PLEASE, I hope not. If so, R.I.P. my favorite BSG pilot. This was her “bid day”?That sucks.

Unless she’s a cylon, I don’t know how she would be back. There’s no search and rescue, everyone believes she’s dead. What? What kind of destiny is this? What do you guys think? Is she gone?