Laura Roslin: Tomb Raider

I have to say that I was particularly excited about this latest episode of Battlestar Galactica. The storylines have been scattered among several different planets, and while I think the writers have done a great job keeping us interested, I really agree with the words of Commander Adama from last week: it’s time to get the fleet back together. President Roslin has convinced a large portion of the fleet to join her on her quest to Kobol. She is now on the planet’s surface, searching for the Tomb of Athena, which is supposed to lead to earth. Commander Adam believes that Roslin is a religious kook, and actually fairly dangerous, but he realizes that there is a reason why people want to believe her. He knows that the fleet is a family, and they have to stay together, for better or worse.After seven episodes, we’re basically starting this season just about where we left off at the beginning. There is a landing party on Kobol looking for the tomb of Athena, only this time, there is actually a chance that they might be able to find it. It looks like they were able to dispatch the only Cylons that were chasing them. Yes, it was at the cost of many lives, but it looks like they are going to be able to find the Tomb of Athena and figure out once and for all if those prophecies mean anything, or if the cancer has been affecting her brain as well. They have Boomer as a guide, so to speak, but the only other thing they have to go on is the scriptures. The weather is horrible, and travel in the forest is slow and difficult. When Elosha died, Roslin lost her best friend and a good part of the faith that has kept her going.

On Galactica, Adama has decided they need to find the people on Kobol. They don’t have any idea where the tomb is either, but they have Tyrel who has already been there, and they can read the scriptures as well. Because there is a danger to the fleet, there is only going to be one Raptor that makes the return to Kobol, and Adama wants to be on it. Considering that he has only been recovering from major internal surgery for a few months now, it seems kind of risky to be out and about, no? Nevertheless, he understands that if anybody is going to convince the President to come back, it will have to be him.

I would like to know what everybody thinks about Gaius Baltar. Personally, I think he is kind of a huge pussy. He is completely whipped by a woman who does not exist, and he just won’t ever shut up. For some reason unknown to the rest of us, he is walking around a cell and then starts to dream of Six again. This time, she is completely naked, with only the back of a chair standing between her and the masturbation fantasies of lot of people – at least, she will be a fantasy once those people get off Everquest.

Six has a few more things to tell Baltar. Remember all of that stuff about their child and how it was going to be the next big thing? Turns out that the next big thing is going to have a surrogate mother because Six is not going to be pregnant. (When he suggested Starbuck would carry the child, she got very upset though.) I guess her pregnancy was more of a metaphor than anything else, which really makes sense since the only sex that she had with Gaius was imaginary. OK, they did have actual sex on Caprica, or at least we think so, because at least that was possible. But think about this. Was Baltar’s relationship with Six always imaginary? What if he is just absolutely crazy?

You know, the more you think about it, the more it makes sense. His mind couldn’t handle the thought that he was responsible for the destruction of mankind, so he starts imagining that this Cylon is speaking to him. She convinces him that God chose him for a mission, and his mission is very important. It’s a lot better thinking there was a reason for your screw-ups than it is coping with the idea that you are responsible for millions of deaths. The scenario makes so much sense, that even Six begins to talk about it. Six wants Baltar to pay attention, so she puts on some clothes. They were some workout sweats and I think this is the first time she hasn’t been in either a slutty evening dress or her dominatrix combat gear. She says that there is no Cylon chip in his brain; she is a product of his subconscious. But if she is just a product of his subconscious, and he is telling this to himself, then really he is crazy. He better get a brain scan or something, and quick, so that’s exactly what he does.

Back on Kobol, everybody is still plodding along. We know that Boomer is going to be a big help, but we aren’t quite sure exactly why. The explanation we get this week is that she is compiling information from a bunch of different sources in order to bring us the clearer picture. Although Sharon is trying to be as helpful as possible, you know it must be kind of difficult for her to sit there and help a bunch of blasphemers. Sharon believes in one true God, doesn’t worship false idols, but must gallivant around with all of these polytheistic fools. That’s what she gets for being unable to keep her legs crossed, and that’s why all of my daughters will have GPS implants.

Speaking of Sharon, how do you think it must feel for her? Even though she wasn’t the person who killed Commander Adama, she readily admits that she has certain memories of what the other Sharon did, including growing up and joining the fleet. She is in love with Helo, or at least her programming has her think she is in love with Helo, but she knew that she wouldn’t be exactly welcome with open arms when she left Caprica. It’s not like they were just going to let he live a normal life, because once she returned, they knew she would be a Cylon. And all of that is before she realized that the other Sharon nearly killed Adama.

Zarek’s buddy Meier senses some of this and has a plan to get rid of Lee. After the ambush and with all of the bad conditions, there hasn’t been a good chance to get rid of Apollo, who never misses a chance to assert his authority over Zarek. Meier wonders if he can use some of Sharon’s fears to get her to kill Apollo instead. After that happened, nobody would say anything if Boomer was shot dead on account of an “accident.” Meier talks to Caprica Boomer and fills her in about what happened to Galactica Boomer. He tells her that she was killed in cold blood without a trial, and the person who shot her got only thirty days in jail. You have to admit, it was a good point that he had. And even though Commander Adama wept openly only a few episodes ago about how Sharon met her fate, could you ever imagine what would happen if he came face to face with her without knowing that she was around, or if she was friendly?

If that question was also in your mind, you didn’t have a long time to wonder what the answer would be. A group from Galactica including Adama, Roslin’s assistant Billy, and Chief Tyrel were aboard and made it safely to Kobol. They were able to find the place where Roslin’s group had set up camp, and to say that it was an emotional reunion grossly understates what was happening on screen. Commander Adama and Lee Adama have a strong yet strained relationship. They have lost one wife and mother as well as a son and brother, the latter as a result of a flight accident. Lee is willing to stand up to his father when he thinks that it is the right thing to do, and there was absolutely no second thoughts in his mind when he helped the President escape. But when he saw his father was there not to take him in as a traitor, but to welcome him into his arms, well, that was some good stuff.

Adama and his son were not the only ones to tearfully welcome each other back. When President Roslin saw Billy, you could see on her face that she was very happy to have somebody she could consider a companion and one she could trust back into the fold. When they were on their way to Kobol, Adama had confided in Billy that Roslin though that he had what it takes to be President. This was new to Billy, and I am guessing he was pretty happy to see that the President considered him a colleague and not just a lackey to do her bidding because 99 percent of the known population had died. Adama saw Starbuck and there was yet another tearful reunion. He never wanted her to go back to Caprica, partially because he thought it was crazy, but also because Starbuck was one of the best pilots and he was worried for her safety. And then he saw Sharon.

Commander Adama was not unaware that he might run into another Sharon at some point and he had said as much to to Chief Tyrel. But looking into the face of somebody who nearly took your life, somebody you thought was gone, was not easy. He sees her, grabs her by the throat, does a little Undertaker-style choke slam, and proceeds to begin choking the life out of her. Although he doesn’t succeed (damn physical exertion caused his heart to act up), the message was clear. She may be in their presence, but he would never trust her again.

Back on Galactica, Baltar was still freaking out about his brain scan. The smoking doctor was about to administer the test, and it looks like Galactica had outdated medical hardware just like it had outdated computers and electronics, because I think I’ve had MRIs that took less time, although my image was of my knee and not my brain, not that the latter couldn’t have used it. Anyway, whenever Gaius needs to settle down and keep his mind on something, Six always appears, or at least his mind imagines that Six is there. This time is no different, and I realized that I might be in the camp that says she is a figment of his imagination. Why do I say that? Whenever he sees her, she is always wanting to get busy with him. I guess she just likes submissive men, or that his brain is saying that she likes submissive men so it is easier to believe that she always in the mood to bang out and he falls prey to her seductions.

Whatever it is, she is back once again at the MRI, and she once again is trying to distract him by playing with his junk. I am not sure why he is complaining. If there was anything that would make an MRI easier, it would have to be a blow job right? Even if it was imaginary? He is looking for brain abnormalities, like a hidden Cylon chip, so all of that blood rushing away from his head wouldn’t be that big of a deal, right? The problem is that Baltar can’t sit still, and the doctor has to restart the test several times. When the results are back, the doctor is very passive aggressive, but states he is fine. Baltar is relieved, but can’t help but to give the doctor the old “I’ll use my middle finger to adjust my glasses because I don’t really like your attitude” move. It’s nice that he’s not crazy, but that still doesn’t explain why Six is always in his head.

The reunions are still going on on Kobol. The most awkward scene of the season goes to Helo, Boomer, and Tyrel on Kobol. Tyrel sees Boomer, who he loved, and had all sorts of sexual relations with. She sees him, and kind of has to say hi and it’s good to see you, even though it was never her body that he was familiar with. And Helo is sitting there, and you know he is kind of upset that Sharon is hugging her sort of ex-boyfriend in front of him and kisses him on the cheek, but then you realize that it must be strange for him in a whole other way. See, he never fell in love with the person that was Tyrel’s Sharon, but when he did fall in love with Caprica Sharon, he thought it was Tyrel’s Sharon, and had sex with her, and now they have a kid (which is a girl, btw; I guess her uterus is at least partly bionic).

Adama and Roslin begin to make up. As he said earlier, most of what was going on that divided the fleet was between really between the two of them. They made their apologies, and Adama might as well had said he was wrong to put her in prison, but never put it in those words. She had been questioning her leadership in light of everything that had happened. She had heard from Starbuck that there were survivors. When the series first popped up last year and civilization was under attack, Adama wanted to stay and fight, but Roslin said that they had lost and they must build a new society. With survivors still fighting for their lives, she thought that maybe she had made the wrong decision. Sensing her pain and anger, Adama reminded her that if it wasn’t for her, that they would likely all be dead. Every day that the colony is alive is a gift, not from the Gods, but from her. Overstating it a little bit? Yes, but he knows that he and the President must make up if the fleet is going to be strong.

After the Commander’s little murder attempt on Sharon, she put things in perspective. Would she ever have a normal life? She was going to have to do something about it. She had thought about Meier’s plan, and had been thinking about it. She told Helo that she has to take matters into her own hands, and that he can’t ask her what she is going to do. Although Zarek told his friend to give up on the thought of taking down Apollo at the moment, Meier spoke with Sharon about taking out both of the Adamas. When they finally get to the entrance of the tomb of Athena, Boomer pulls a gun on the Commander. When Lee raises his gun and aims, Meier puts his gun to Lee’s head. At that moment, Boomer turns around and shoots Meier, exposing a traitor amongst them and proving that she is different (at least for now) from the Sharon that actually pulled the trigger on the old man. She gives her gun to Adama, tells him who she got it from, and says that she is in control of herself and can make her own decisions. Everybody might not believe her, but she made a really good case for them to at least begin to trust her again.

Now that there are no more traitors, everybody can enter the Tomb of Athena in peace. It took a little while to figure out how to get inside, but once inside they saw that there was representations of all of the twelve colonies. Each of the colonies is represented by what we would know as zodiac symbols. Caprica was Capricorn, Virgon was Virgo, etc., etc. Sagitaron the archer seemed to be the only statue in place, and his bow was missing an arrow. Hmmm. Oh right! The arrow of Apollo. Once Starbuck placed the arrow in the bow, everybody in the room was taken to a field, once again showing the icons of the twelve colonies, but also their ancient representations, which were, you guessed it, constellations. It took a little while to figure out exactly what those constellations meant, and how it was supposed to get them to earth. They soon realized that the field where they were transported was Earth, and Earth was the place where you could look to the sky and see the symbols of all twelve colonies.

So, they know what to look for, and they were also given a general direction by a nebula near one of the constellations, giving them an idea of the direction. Where they wanted to go was a long way off, but at least they were given hope. They could once again rally behind the idea that kept them together in the first place, which was finding earth.

With this new information, everybody is happy. The President proved she was not *that* crazy, and Adama suddenly found an objective that he could strive for as well. He gives a nice little speech bringing everybody back together and putting the president, who is suddenly too happy to care that her cancer is going to kill her in a few months, back in power. Everybody cheers and we get to go back exploring space and worrying about normal things like rescuing survivors, giving birth to half-robot babies, and trying to figure out who in the fleet is a traitor and wants to kill everybody, which brings us to the closing of the episode. Boomer is in the cell that Gaius first heard Six talk about being the place where their baby would be born, and Baltar overhears her talking about being pregnant with Helo and not wanting their baby to be born there. Suddenly, it all comes together. Six appears and confirms that Boomer’s baby will be the beginning of the next chapter of existence. She is an angel from God, and says that the next chapter will end with the extinction of the human race.

Overall, I really liked this episode. The resolution of the big rift between Adama and Roslin seemed plausible, and we finally have some sort of idea what the fleet’s goals will be for the foreseeable future. The Boomer “is she or isn’t she” evil drama is still intriguing, and when you look at it in the scope of Baltar’s sanity, well, it makes for one interesting pregnancy.