Oh it’s been a long season over at the Beauty and the Geek house and it’s all come down to two teams – Cecille and Nate vs. Scooter and Megan. Tonight, one of these teams will be taking home 250 large, and if there is a God, Cecille won’t see a penny.
Honestly, has there ever been anyone on this show as hated as Cecille? Even Cher from season 2 wasn’t hated this much by her fellow housemates and viewers. Personally, I kind of liked Cher, even though she was a bit of a fake and a little too full of herself. But I am vowing to never watch another second of this show if Cecille even gets a whiff of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow that is Beauty and the Geek. Much like her days from high school, she has clearly learned nothing. This wouldn’t bother me so much if it weren’t for the fact that she’s so proud to be stupid and unlikable. Hopefully it will all come back to her in the end…
And we open as usual with Nate and Cecille’s return upstairs and get reminded of Cecille’s little speech at the end of her victory last week. It was something about taking the blonde off the beach but the blonde still being a whorish bimbo in case you forgot. Scooter and Nate have a quick chat about her little comment and Scooter feels that he must say something to her about it. I’m not sure what the point of that would be though, considering Cecille has no regard for anyone but herself and didn’t even realize how obnoxious her comment was in the first place.
Scooter confronts her about it anyway and Cecille says she had the right to say anything she wants. She continues to say “Scooter, every time you talk to me you have something negative to say.” Yeah well, that’s because YOU SUCK AND ARE A MISERABLE PERSON. It’s some kind of miracle that Cecille has made it this far in life without being accidentally electrocuted or eaten by wolves. I guess there’s still time.
The next morning the two remaining teams meet Mike in the study who tells them that today they’ll spend the day showing their partners something they excel in. This is nothing new as they’ve done the same thing in all seasons past. Yay, filler!
If all goes as usual, they’ll also be answering questions about their partners in the final Elimination Room. At least that’s what they think…Could there be a curveball in the future? Based on previews of this week’s episode, I’m going to guess yes.
Since it’s time to begin an unnecessary montage of activities, we start with Megan, who is dressed in about as little clothing as possible. She takes Scooter out to a tennis court because apparently, she’s an expert. Funny, I thought her hobby was going to be reading 17th century poetry.
Meanwhile, Cecille takes Nate to studio in order to “show Nate something I’m good at.” By now we know that Cecille is only good at abusing small animals, annoying everyone she knows, talking like a three year old child, and having sex for money. What else could she possibly be good at? Selling babies on the black market? Training new Al Qaeda operatives? Will she be showing Nate the wonderful charity work she does in her free time? Nope, it’s dancing! Apparently she has seven years of dance experience, 12 if you count all the time she’s been working at The Landing Strip (conveniently located right by the airport).
She teaches Nate some “hip-hop” dance moves and Nate is surprised she’s capable of dancing and talking at the same time. Nate does some moves with her and has never looked whiter in his life. Although the argyle socks paired with the rest of his “hip-hop” clothing is an interesting touch. This whole scene sort of plays out like that Jessica Alba movie, “Honey,” except somehow worse.
We’re then treated to a monologue by Scooter about what a great partner Megan has been. And well, compared to Cecille, Megan has been a dream. And while Megan is about a billion times more likeable than Cecille, I can’t say I feel like she’s come a long way throughout this show. Her and Scooter managed to float under the radar this entire time, watching more deserving teams get knocked out (see Mario and Nadia and perhaps even Andrea and Matt). Oh well. At this point I’d rather see a team comprised of Hitler and a reincarnated Anna Nicole Smith win than Cecille.
Scooter and Megan continue a day of outdoor activities when he decides to take her on a hike for his activity, and Nate takes Cecille into yet another studio where his band from Harvard is waiting onstage. Lest you forget, Nate is in a Star Wars tribute band that is apparently called So Long Princess. God help us.
Nate and his band proceed to perform a “song” called “Storm Trooper.” I don’t want to say that Nate is the worst singer ever, but he ranks somewhere between William Hung and Sid Vicious. Don’t get me wrong, I like the Sex Pistols as much as the next guy, but ol’ Sid wasn’t exactly the most melodic of singers. I’m guessing that So Long Princess doesn’t play a lot of shows in front of people because, well, they are really, really bad. At least Nate’s got a lot of energy on stage. I suppose that counts for something.
Megan and Scooter continue their hike, but it’s not nearly as entertaining as Nate gyrating on stage to Storm Trooper. Nate invites Cecille on stage to help sing the chorus, which goes “I’m a storm trooper, I’m not a robot.” I don’t want to say that this is the worst song ever but I’m pretty sure my ears just started bleeding and my cat leapt out of the window.
Back at the mansion, the teams pack and begin to study for what they think will be the final Elimination Room that evening. Cecille prepares by emptying an entire bottle of hairspray on herself as the ozone layer wept. Nate begins to recite a list of Cecille’s “achievements”: 2003′s Miss Honolulu Flirt (whatever that is), 2004′s Miss Denmark Hawaiian Tropic, and 2007′s Most Hated Person on Television. That last one wasn’t easy by the way, what with the latest Real World being full of the worst human beings in this country.
The teams enter the Elimination Room and are greeted by Mike who has got a little surprise for them. Unlike previous seasons, they will not be asked questions about each other in the final ER, but instead they will be judged by the people who witnessed their journeys firsthand…all of the eliminated teams!
Everyone is ecstatic. That is, except for Cecille since this has just about sealed her fate. All of the eliminated teams are in the study smiling and waving and just waiting to exact their revenge. “I was happy to see some of the people on the screen, but for the most part, none of them,” says Cecille. Well that oughta win their hearts over. Mike says that they have one night to convince all of the eliminated teams to vote for them in order to win. The teams will also be voting individually, and not on a team-by-team basis.
Cecille seems to think that it’s now her job to kiss ass, but apparently doesn’t realize that it will probably be too little too late. Next of course is the big reunion, where Nate and Jennylee hug and are super excited to see each other again. Yeah, this relationship will definitely last past this show…
Everyone shares a toast, led by Mario, who I’m still angry is not a part of the final two teams. Mario and Nate have a conversation about his new relationship with Jennylee and Mario tells us that it’s just too bad that Nate is teamed up with Cecille, the Queen of All Evil.
Upstairs, Andrea confronts Cecille. Andrea says that she’s pissed off that Cecille formed her clique of blondes early on and helped get Andrea kicked off the show. She goes on to say that she thinks it’s wrong the way Cecille treated the guys in the house. She makes a lot of valid points, to which Cecille doesn’t agree with any. Oh Andrea, why are you wasting your breath? Cecille was never in this house to make a change, she was only here to try to get famous and make some money.
Later that night, Cecille has a conversation with Megan in which she says “I did not like Andrea. I don’t want to have to explain myself to fucking ugly motherfucking Sheree.” Aw, leave Sheree and her forehead alone. Cecille starts crying, and then goes and talks to Nate. She seems to think that this entire process was about kissing everyone’s ass, which couldn’t be further from correct.
The next morning, Megan says that Cecille has starting acting really bitter since she’s realized that she’s probably not going to win. Wow, that’s surprising. Everyone seems to agree that Cecille has not changed at all. In fact, the only people who seem to have a real decision to make are Jennylee and Matt. Jennylee says she would love to see Nate win and doesn’t even see the issue. Oh, blinded by fake love.
Matt is also torn because he feels like he made friends with Cecille. We’re shown a flashback to one of the first nights in the house when Cecille dressed Matt up like a girl, which he apparently thought made them friends. Poor, poor Matt. I guess you don’t have to be smart to be a geek.
After having another conversation with Cecille in which she acts like a complete dingbat, Nate makes a decision. He decides that he no longer wants to win, and goes to nearly everyone in the house and basically tells them to vote for the other team. What’s great about this is it’s not even a ruse or a trick to get votes, his speech sounds genuine because he doesn’t want Cecille to get the message that it’s okay to be the way she is. Nate says the lessons he’s learned aren’t worth the money and it’s more important for her to learn a lesson than to win. Wow. Nate might not be the greatest singer ever but at least the guy’s showing some class.
Even though this seems all but decided, it’s time for the big vote. Megan, Scooter, Nate and Cecille all gather on the staircase and wait for the votes to come in. Cach team is led in one by one to cast their votes, in reverse order from when they were eliminated. First is Jennylee and Niels. Jennylee casts the first vote for Cecille and Nate, but only because she wants Nate to win. Niels on the other hand votes for Scooter and Megan.
The next team in is Mario and Nadia. Nadia makes a nice little speech, and without insulting Cecille she votes for Megan and Scooter. Mario says that his vote came down to the women thus his vote is also for Megan and Scooter.
Erin and Drew come in next, and unsurprisingly, they both vote for Megan and Scooter. Next in the room is Andrea (looking like a complete knockout by the way) and her idiot partner Matt. Andrea votes for Megan and Scooter. Matt makes a little speech and says he’s voting on the team that he thinks helped him change the most. He says there’s one person who helped him the most, and that was Cecille. I’m still confused as to how being dressed up like an 11 year old girl helped him change for the better, but that’s why Matt is a jackass.
It doesn’t really matter though because Sheree and Piao are the next team to vote. Sheree casts her vote for Megan and Scooter, giving them an insurmountable lead and thus the victory.
I’m pretty sure that even if Nate hadn’t gone around and told everyone to vote for the other team, the outcome still would have been the same.
Nate hopes that Cecille will take something out of this, but in classic Cecille mode, she tells us “anyone who thinks they learned something from some nerdy guy, then those girls are as stupid as they look.” That’s the last we see of her, hopefully forever. Oh I’m so happy that she did not win.
Scooter and Megan get their montage of their time together as season three comes to a close.
Are you guys as happy as I am that Cecille didn’t win? Did Nate do the right thing by tanking at the end?