Beauty and the Geek: Cliff Hangers Are For Suckers

An even more unconvincing paid audience than the one from “America’s Funniest Home Videos.”

Dear readers, I will torture you no more with my withholding of the announcement of this season’s winner of “Beauty and the Geek.” No, I shall not bore you with my excuses of how I was unable to record the show, then had to wait for it to come online, but then it didn’t come online for a really long time (a week), and then I kind of didn’t even care anymore. No, I won’t do that to you. I will now unleash this information unto my fellow Gasmii. I mean, you know, after the jump.This was basically a recap episode of an already kinda boring season. The only cool moment was when Joshua’s mom showed up.

Otherwise, it’s the basic end-of-season live finale. The geeks are still geeky but also still cute, the beauties are still hot, and apparently one of them is going for her anthropology degree. I honestly didn’t see that one coming. Anyway, I’m just gonna cut to the chase here.

After several weeks….

Several beauties…

and several geeks…

America….

You voted….

And…

The winner….

of this season…

of “Beauty and The Geek”…

is…

going to be announced after this commercial break.

And we’re back! The winners are these two lovable galoofs.

Yay Dave and Jas! I knew they could do it. And when I say “knew,” I mean I never believed in them. But that doesn’t mean I’m not absolutely thrilled for them. Enjoy your chunk of change and change of heart! It’s been fun recapping this fucker for you guys. Hope you’ll join me next year for the Pussycat Dolls show! That shit’s gonna be awesome. Much love, peace in the Middle East, and snark power to all….

love, O. Snapp