The Summer of Secrets continues on Big Brother 6, and here’s a secret I bet you didn’t know: Eric is an idiot. Oh wait, that’s not really a secret. More of a given, right? Yes, the righteous fireman was up on his high horse again (which for him requires a rope ladder, given how high his horse is and, well, how short and trollish he is). Truth is that nothing gets me more riled up than a bombastic, sanctimonious player, but when cold-as-ice strategists like Kaysar, Janelle, and James are around, the resulting conflict is nothing less than transfixing television. Tonight was no exception as the household imploded in the wake of Kaysar’s shrewd nominations. Heck, I even thought we’d get Fight Night Part II.
Unfortunately, there were no fisticuffs tonight, but we had plenty of anger, spite, and backstabbing to keep us pacified — at least until Thursday when our bloodlust renews again. Three weeks in, and this is already turning into a mighty fine season. Who woulda thunk it?The episode began with the patented blue-and-white flashback sequence; this time highlighting Kaysar’s scandalous nomination ceremony. We got to relive all those golden moments: Maggie’s pure shock, Janelle’s triumphant glee, and Ivette’s creepy personification of The Grudge. Or was it more The Ring? Either way, she looked like the demon-child in a Japanese horror film, and I momentarily thought she might just kill all her roommates with one carefully executed snarl. (I also contemplated the thought that she might simply emerge from my TV and go all Samara on my ass.)

Most annoying Japanese horror ghost EVER
Anyway, past became present as the blue-and-white filter dissolved into full-blown color (during a hug, as usual). Question: Whatever happened to the nifty music they used to play prior to the “colorization”? You know what I’m talking about? The slowly building drumbeat, escalating synth sounds, and— okay, never mind. No one cares. Back to the show… So Eric was all pissed off about the nominations, saying that they came out of left field. “I think that the bubble was burst out of everybody’s overall game plan,” he said. I didn’t know everyone had a bubble in their game plan. I suppose their plans all had sails too, and guess what, Kaysar took the wind out of those also. Hey, did you guys go to the game plan parade? Because it got RAINED ON.
Heh. That’ll teach Eric not to incorrectly attach a metaphor to a literal phrase. Jerk.
As everyone reeled from the nominations, James bitterly sat on his bed, angry at Kaysar’s move. “He told me yesterday I was safe. To my face. In his room,” scowled James. Funny, ’cause at that same meeting, you lied and said you weren’t with Sarah. And you said that to his face. In his room. Just saying. Meanwhile, Maggie found a nice corner and cried Chloë Sevigny tears (they’re like normal tears, except with more indie cred). Yes, everyone was bawling and complaining, which was amusing because no one even attempted this show of histrionics when Michael and Janelle faced the firing squad last week. Up in the HOH room, however, Eric found Kaysar and did his best to kiss – nay, make love to – his ass: “Brother, look at me. This is a game. Are you okay, brother?” Because apparently they’re “brothers” now. Sure, Eric spent the lion’s share of the past ten days telling everyone how much he couldn’t trust Kaysar, but that shouldn’t preclude them from being “brothers,” or better yet, “brothas.” Eric then went on to say, “Hey, I respect you so much, I’m going to put on another piece of Las Vegas Fire Department clothing. Just for you, brother.”
While Eric may have been all smiles and pats on the back upstairs, his mood quickly changed in the backyard as he entertainingly ‘roid raged against Maggie. She accused him of not divulging his deal with Kaysar, causing Eric’s face to contort into a gnarled mess. “I told you that!” he growled with teeth clenched and enough rage to send Maggie’s purdy little ribbon flying from her hair.



The rare chaise-lounge ‘roid rage!
While the two of them shared notes, however, James paid a visit to Kaysar, who immediately apologized for putting him on the chopping block. “It’s just a game,” replied James happily. It should be noted, however, that in Big Brother-ese, “It’s just a game” means “I hate you, you motherf*cking asshole!”
Well, Kaysar let James know that Eric was actively campaigning against him, something that immediately incensed the security guard – I mean, “loss prevention manager.” James then went down to the gold room, which has since become Janelle’s de facto lair, and revved up his anti-Eric crusade, saying that he was the biggest liar in the house. As for Eric? Well, after having punched Maggie in the face (okay, okay, he merely growled some more), he had now moved onto bigger and badder things. Namely, coaster inventory. “Uh, they got rid of our coasters!” announced Eric, after having marched by the living room table. They got rid of the coasters?!?!?!? Summer of Secrets INDEED!
“I walked past the living room table where we play Coaster Toss — it’s a little game we came up with,” explained Eric. And an exciting game too! You see, you toss the coasters onto the table. My pulse races just thinking about it. Alas, it looks like my plans to watch August’s “Coaster Toss Tournament of Champions” have been sidelined! What to do instead? I suppose there’s always the Breadcrumb Flick Summer Derby or the perennial favorite, Paperclip Bounce Celebrity Invitational. Sigh. They’re just not as good as Coaster Toss, dammit!
Nevertheless, in place of the coasters were several small tiles that mirrored the larger ones hanging on the bedroom wall. Sarah, who previously proved to be an expert with clues (she did unlock the gym, let’s not forget), managed to use these new tiles to find a secret compartment, inside of which was a blacklight flashlight. Additionally, there was a note saying that the houseguests should shine the flashlight everywhere for the next clue. Before we knew it, the lights were off and the flashlight scanning every surface of the house. Was I the only one expecting a giant mess of semen stains on Howie’s bed? Hmmm…probably shouldn’t have gone there.
Anyway, this little scavenger hunt led to the fish tank, and after the assembled group read the next clue with the awkward diction of a first-grader attempting “See Spot Run,” they were then sent to the gold room and told that the number of “seas” on the little world map hanging on the wall was the first number for the combination on one of the safes. Got that? Anyway, everyone crowded around the map and attempted to count all the seas, but since it was easier for them to blurt out random numbers, that’s what they did, eventually deciding that the final tally was either four or twelve. Actually, the real answer was seventeen, but hey, I’m not going to make fun of the house guests for screwing that up. I mean, counting is like really hard. Try it. 1… 2… 3… 4… 812… 74…shit! See what I mean?
Once the roomies were done with this silly numerical quest, Sarah had a heart-to-heart with Janelle about the game. Our blonde-haired super strategist asked her if she knew James, but again Sarah denied a connection. Ah, but all this lying was wearing on poor, emotionally vulnerable Sarah. With a guilty conscience, she ran to her boyfriend and confessed that she wanted to tell Janelle, and surprisingly, James said okay. After all, if he wanted to get off the chopping block, he knew he’d have to come clean with Kaysar. So Sarah went off to spill the beans with Janelle while James handled the HOH. Watching the two outcasts’ reactions was pretty entertaining. Upon learning of the secret relationship, Janelle hugged Sarah in a touchy-feely moment worthy of some Chubby Hubby and a VHS copy of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. Kaysar, meanwhile, reacted with steely triumph. “I knew it!” he exclaimed. “Of course you knew it,” responded James. Kaysar then replied, “Of course you knew that I knew it.” To which James retorted, “Of course you knew that I knew that you knew.” They continued for hours.
Turns out that James’ risky play to unveil his secret alliance worked beautifully. By the end of the meeting, Kaysar had agreed to take him off the chopping block (if he could) and nominate Eric instead. All he needed to do now was bring Howie and Rachel on board. And so out went James and in came Rachel. Kaysar laid it all out on the table for her, saying that he knew she was working with Howie. He then commented that Michael was his partner and Ashlea was Janelle’s — at which point we saw possibly the most unflattering flashback image of Ashlea EVER.
To seal the deal, Kaysar then explained that James and Sarah were actually dating, causing Rachel’s bug-eyes to inflate larger than tennis balls. You see, Rachel had thought Sarah was James’ sister, a sentiment echoed by Janelle and, later, Howie. This means that a) James and Sarah seem vaguely incestuous, b) James is really pretty, or c) Sarah is really ugly. Eh, I suppose we can also throw in an option d) All of the above. (Don’t worry Sarah, I don’t think you’re ugly.)
Anyway, in the wake of this scheming, a new alliance formed: Kaysar, Janelle, James, Sarah, Howie, and Rachel. The three couples agreed that they’d be the final six, and then from that point on, may the best man win. Unfortunately, the next day, Kaysar had to pay lip service to Maggie by saying that she was a pawn to get rid of James. “I had to put my poker face on,” he said. Yes, he gave Maggie the “stoic, death-glare poker face,” which is not to be confused with his “stoic, death-glare sincere face.” Eric then popped his head in the room and said, “No need to raise your voice… brother.”
Well, with the alliances going haywire, it was finally time for the veto competition. Here’s how it broke down: Kaysar chose Howie, Maggie chose Ivette, and James chose Janelle. This, of course, pissed James’ old alliance off royally. After all, had he chosen Eric, there would have been the possibility that both he AND Cappy would be safe. Alas, the bitter nominee knew better than that as he elected the one person the rest of his former alliance hated the most. “James picks Janelle. I think I crapped my pants!” snapped Ivette in an interview. To be fair, she says that about everything. “It’s partially cloudy today with high humidity. I think I crapped my pants!”
Just how shocked was Ivette about James’ pick? Well, gastro-intestinal incontinence was just the tip of the Spicy Latina iceberg. “I was more in shock today than my mother was the day she found out I like girls,” she said. Uh, yeah, I’m pretty sure your mom would disagree. I’ll tell you what will be shocking though: the day that Ivette finally SHUTS UP!
Anyway, after picking, the teams headed out to the backyard where an oversized chess board awaited them. I of course thought this would be Janelle’s specialty, but then here came Kaysar, announcing that he loved chess. Okay, cool. Anyone else like chess? Oh, James has something to say. “Chess: there’s no one that can beat me in this house,” he boasted. Great. Let’s start playing.
“I was the chess champion…OF MY CITY,” noted Maggie in her interview. Okay, seriously, what the hell is going on here? Is this the big twist: everyone was the president of a chess club? Hey, maybe April is the secret mistress of Bobby Fisher. Or better yet, I’d place money that The Chenbot’s dad is Deep Blue. It’s a SUMMER OF SECRETS!
Nevertheless, tonight’s veto competition had the players all serving as veritable knights. They each could chose a starting place on the chess board and would have thirty seconds to make a move. Players could only move in a knight-like pattern, and upon landing on a square, it had to be removed, thus taking the spot out of play for the others. Once someone had no more moves, he or she would be eliminated. Anyway, Ivette kicked things off by choosing a random square near a corner. This of course limited her moves. Why not start in the center? I’ll let Janelle explain: “Ivette’s a complete moron.” Yeah, that seems about right. Meanwhile, Maggie took a square directly in the corner, thus cutting away 75% of her possible moves. Exactly which city was she the chess champion of? Dumbassville? San FranIdiotsco? HonoDumblu? I could go on for hours.
Anyway, everyone pretty much targeted Ivette and Maggie by taking squares that would reduce their potential moves. As fun as it was to watch them and Eric squirm (and believe me, it was fun), my favorite parts of this whole challenge were the plodding sound effects and cheesy white puff illustrations the producers added every time someone moved. I so wish my footsteps were accompanied by an imposing drum and a little cloud. How awesome would that be?
Well, the first victim of this nouveau chess game was Ivette, who balked, “These piranhas come after me, corner me, think two steps ahead of me, and I’m out!” Yeah, who do you people think you are? Thinking two steps ahead of Ivette! You know that she’s not capable of “applying” “logic.” That’s totally unfair! It’s like comparing SAT scores with a mentally challenged kid. By the way, I didn’t know that piranhas were known for their ability to corner. Actually, come to think of it, I didn’t know piranhas were known for their ability to think two steps ahead of Ivette. Either that’s pretty impressive on the piranha’s part, or Ivette just admitted that she’s dumber than a fish.
With Ivette out of the way, everyone could focus on Maggie, and it wasn’t long before the nurse found herself cornered like many a piranha victim. Some nifty, zippy sound effects denoted that she indeed had nowhere else to turn, and a shocked Maggie stepped out of the competition. The rest of the event sped by in a series of cross-dissolves, and as Eric caught on to what was happening, he became increasingly irate. “Kaysar doesn’t know how to throw a game,” he sneered. “Howie was a part of what I call the evil empire,” he also commented. Eric then charged the chess board, yelling “I HAVE A NORMAL SIZED PENIS!”
Actually, that didn’t happen, but afterwards, when James had won the veto, Eric tried to contain his rage by offering up his usual phony compliments: “Nice job dudes. That was awesome.” Let’s hear it for the brothers! Maggie, meanwhile, pulled Kaysar to a corner and asked him WTF was going on. “You sealed my fate,” she complained. “No. I sealed your partner’s fate. I caught the bigger fish,” replied Kaysar. I’m starting to believe Kaysar is simply a robot controlled by Hollywood screenwriters. Nearly everything he says seems to come directly from a political thriller or some police procedural. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy when he speaks. Quite the contrary. I love his dramatic comments, unlike Ivette’s, who seems to pull random words and phrases from the dictionary and string them into a barely coherent syntax.
Speaking of Ivette, she was unsurprisingly babbling away in the kitchen when Maggie returned in shock and awe. The nurse revealed that Kaysar had just “tanked” the challenge on purpose, causing an irate Eric to charged into the backyard (for real this time) and demand that the HOH look into his (beady, little) eyes and tell him he was safe. Kaysar full on admitted that he was going to put Eric up instead, and in response, the stumpy fireman tried his hand at some clunky passive aggression: “Hey. Thanks for keeping your deal. Appreciate that.” Nice sarcasm! Really effective. Maybe you should try some guilt though. Oooh, and maybe demean his religion too. “You swore your life on it. All right. I don’t think that’s in the Koran anywhere, but we’ll go with it,” said Eric, whose Bible CLEARLY condones character assassination, fighting, and of course swearing on one’s children for the sake of winning a reality show.
“You’re a dirty player,” responded Kaysar. FINALLY. I thought no one would ever say it to him. Granted, Eric isn’t the dirtiest player Big Brother has seen, but he’s that obnoxious mix of self-righteousness and hypocrisy that always gets the blood boiling. Well, all heated from his exchange with Kaysar, Eric returned to the house pretending to be cool — but not really. You know how that is: he’d fly off the handle but then add “but that’s cool!” or “but that’s okay!” at the end of every sentence. You’re a real tool, Eric, but that’s cool! Suddenly the bastion of levelheadedness, Ivette played referee by saying, “Let’s not get nasty.” She then added, “Hey, remember that time I made fun of Michael for having messed up teeth? Yeah, that was great. But seriously, let’s not get nasty.”
Despite Ivette’s admonitions, Eric was on a tear. He ripped his Las Vegas Fireman’s hat off of James, sneering, “And you can take that union hat off too!” Yeah, what an asshole James is. He had the nerve to “campaign” for “himself.” Jerk. Seriously, what exactly did James do wrong here? I can understand Eric being mad at Kaysar or even Howie, but James? Was it because James campaigned against Eric? Because as far as I can remember, it was Eric who had first campaigned to keep James on the chopping block. Oh, was it that James broke the all-guys alliance? No, because Eric broke that alliance last week. Hmmm… What could have made Eric so mad? Oh, duh. Steroids. I totally forgot.
Anyway, Eric’s baby-wants-his-bottle moment continued as he insisted, “I’m not upset.” Yes, he’s not upset at all, NOW GIVE ME MY HAT! Alas, he brought up the Koran again, and thankfully, Maggie reproached him by saying, “Leave religion out of this.” Eric was inconsolable though. “Why? He’s the one who brings it in all the time!” he responded. Yeah, Kaysar should really stop playing the religious card. Why does he have to rub it in everyone’s faces by “praying” and “being a Muslim” and “having a name like ‘Kaysar’?”
In case you thought this disaster was over, you’d be wrong. Cappy lashed out again, saying “No, I’ve said my piece. It’s over. And Sarah, don’t think I don’t know you’re with James either.” But yeah, he’s not upset. It’s over. He has nothing left to say… … … (crickets chirping)… OH AND ANOTHER THING!!!!

Looks like someone just got hit by the Karma Boomerang
Okay, finally Eric went to his time-out corner, and the next day was the Veto Ceremony. After a decent little speech, James announced, “I’m choosing to use the veto nomination on myself.” I’m not sure, but I think he just re-nominated himself. Actually no. What he meant to say was that he chose to use the power of veto (ahem, golden power of veto) on himself, which meant that Kaysar had to nominate Eric for eviction. And so ended a topsy-turvy episode which achieved every ounce of chaos we had hoped and prayed for. We knew Kaysar’s nominations would shake things up, but I had no idea to what extent. Seeing Eric stuck on the chopping block was a fantastic way to close out the episode, thus providing another wonderful hairpin turn in television’s twistiest series.
What did you think? Did Eric play his cards right? Did Kaysar play his cards right? And what about James?
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96 Comments
I must give props to Kaysar. He figured out all the match-ups even though his friends disagreed on the pairings. Kaysar has proved to be really intelligent and his actions as hoh is genius.
That was perhaps the best episode of Big Brother EVER. Kudos for perfect execution of a plan.
How ridiculous was Ivette? The drama. She just met Eric five minutes ago….has Beau in the house with her, and says that losing Eric is “Like losing my BEST FRIEND”. DAMN!!! Beau WHO???
that was great TV! I like Kaysar a lot more now. I especially liked how he told Eric to his face that the game had changed and he was going up next. Plus- he wasn’t too cocky about it either.
Kaysar who? No this guy is not sweet at all. I’m calling him Dictator Kaysar from now on because that Iraqi blood sure does run deep. And like an Iraqi dictator he’ll smile in your face while cutting your fingers off one by one. The difference is you can’t help but love this dictator. All Hail Dictator Kaysar!
Great Ep. Great Recap. Great checkmate move by the Dictator!
Ellen that’s TOTALLY what I was thinking… What about Beau? What about holding hands and twirling together on the beach? How quickly that spicy Latina forgets.
YESSSSSSS!!!
kaysar is the MAN. the moment when he dropped the bomb on maggie was easily the high point of the season thus far. as for the ‘roid munchkin, well, the disgraceful hypocrisy is no surprise. what’s so frustrating is that eric seems to genuinely think that he as played ‘honestly’ and ‘with integrity,’ when he has been by far the most aggressive schemer and backstabber. can’t wait to hear his latest sermon–on the way out the door.
of course, while kaysar deserves to gloat over his victory, james has proven to be quite the player. he may be the classic xenophobic, ignorant-but-self-righteous-and-opinionated redneck of the house (if any of you folks in california are wondering how bush got reelected, consider james ‘exhibit a’), but he clearly understands that all of this ‘playing the game honestly and with integrity’ nonsense is for LOSERS. i don’t know if he can win now that kaysar has forced his hand, but it’s about time somebody stood up and refused to apologize for playing to win.
Eric is an obnoxious *sshole. I can’t wait to see him get the boot and land on his taint. I actually want to call House Calls with Marcellus and ask Eric just what the f. was he thinking when he said to Ju Chen that Michael made a comment about his parents and thats why he had to move to Vegas. THAT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE, ERIC!Even as I write it, I know how dumb that is. I hate that guy.
And Witchette and Maggie are dumb, dumb, dumb. Even if they are still in the house, they could get up off their c*nts and still try and play the game. They could win HOH and mess with the Six-Person Alliance. And just how long will that Alliance ;ast…
As a poster child for intellectual mediocrity, I think that Howie could go very far, if not the distance. I’m not a fan of the spastic Neanderthal, but I do believe that, for as loud and crass as he is, he’s pretty much under the strategic radar. Nobody takes him seriously, and that’s the cornerstone of his overall plan.
I Kelley Kaysar’s total manipulation of the house. Large fun to watch unfold. However, I believe that he tipped his hand too early. But hey, for however much longer he hangs in there, he’s definitely giving us our money’s worth of entertainment.
Ah, BB at it’s best! I re-played the “shock and awe” scene between Kaysar and Maggie three times. Perfection! I can’t wait to say BuhBye (and see ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya) to Eric.
Now I wonder how long this new 6-person alliance will last (because you know it won’t, something is bound to happen).
One more thing… where do the evicted house guests go? Home? To some secret location? And how many people vote for the final winner? (God, I need to get a life!)
I am very upset that Eric may be leaving. He is the perfect Bog Brother contestant. An obnoxious hypocritical holier than thou insane person. You want to keep that around for at least a month or 2, and THEN backstab him. Ah well, it was still a fantastic episode. And I was thinking this year would be boring.
I enjoy Sarah’s stupidness, since she thinks she’s not stupid.
Even I spit out my diet cherry vanilla Dr. Pepper when I saw that horsefaced picture of Ashlea. They couldn’t go with a nice boob shot by the pool? God can you imagine waking up the next day after trolling the reality show bars, taking her home and giving her your “golden power of veto” and then waking up the next day finding that next to you?
This is by far THE BEST Big Brother yet. They FINALLY figured it out and didn’t come in like a bunch of dumbies that never saw the show before. Well at least 6 of them anyway. Kaysar doesn’t owe any apologies because I guarantee that he would have been put up next week if one of Eric’s EMPLOYEES has won HOH. Good for him!!!
And MAN….when Eric took that hat off of James’ head. UGH!!! That was SO five year old on the playground. If he could have, he would have thrown sand in his face. LOVED IT!!
Also thought it was AWESOME how even Janelle was smart enough to keep up during the chess game and corner Maggie and Ivette before she went out.
Ellen, I don’t think Janelle is stupid. She has come across as very shrewd, using the ditzy persona to her advantage but showing some decent strategizing skills. If the others think that Kaysar and/or James is the mastermind, then Janelle gets her way while not attracting quite as much negative attention. It’s a good plan.
Definitely…..I never said she was stupid. I think she is very intelligent. She sat back quietly and figured out everyone in the house. They don’t understand her…..so they say she’s dumb.
Being called DUMB by Ivette, is like Rainman saying it.
Okay, NOW I see why everyone is obsessed with this show. Awesome episode. Kaysar really has poise. If *I* had mastermind that whole thing AND defend my actions/lie about them, I’d be a blushing, stammering, stuttering idiot.
And I liked the tricep flex he did after wishing Maggie good luck. Niiiiice!
And a final “HA!!!!” to B-Side for “Eric then charged the chess board yelling, “I HAVE A NORMAL SIZED PENIS!”
exactly right, ashes, i love janelle. remember, she was the one who suggested to put james and maggie up in the first place, and look how brilliant of a move that was.
My new favorite fantasy band name EVER: “Howie’s Semen Stains”! Cum-ing to a bed near you!
And my new favorite fantasy sequel: ‘Searching for the secret mistress of Bobby Fisher’ – Go Big Blue! (or to continue the sex motif, whould that be ‘Blew’?)
But seriously, folks: you had me at that picture of I-vette and the caption: Most annoying Japanese horror ghost EVER – Hi-larious!
ha!
P.S. To dictate or to dictator – is this a dictation nation?
Great recap! You only missed April’s short interview where she expressed anger at James for having the nerve to save himself when he could have protected Eric. WTF?
It all came full circle to Janelle playing chess with the guys to determine who was the best strategist. Gotta hand it to her that she allied herself with the best one – and ironically the big move happened on a chess board!
I can only imagine the look of utter glee on Michael’s face when it took Kaysar all of a day to “avenge” Mike’s eviction.
I think April is so stupid that she still hasn’t figured out what’s going on. Perhaps its true that the mind is the first thing to go with old age
You crack me up. Thank you!
So what’s to come? Previews show April telling Kaysar that they are going to slice and dice him. Funny, that’s what I thought Kaysar did to THEM!!! After what he did, she is still dumb enough to think that HE is the stupid one.
Eddie,
Don’t be upset that Eric is leaving. The hate for Ivette will fill that void.
When I first saw the chessboard I thought they would have to do some Harry Potter-esque Wizard’s Chess.
My favorite part was when they were counting the number of seas, and someone said. “There are only 4, we are really smart,” and then BB flashed up the graphic: “There are 17 seas.” Summer of Secrets, indeed!
I missed a few episodes, but did they ever address the dissolution of the Guy’s alliance? And how Eric thought that since there were more girls than guys, the guys should gang up because the girls are a threat? And that Beau is one of the girls… but yet all of a sudden he is with them. Good riddance Eric.
Did anyone else notice that they seemed to completely forget about unlocking the safe? It was like they forgot that they were ever even TRYING to figure out the code. I want to know what’s in there dammit. Are they still waiting on more clues for more numbers or something?
Also, I’m pretty sure everyone has also forgotten that Beau even exists. Maybe in a couple of months when it’s down to 3 or 4 people, Beau will come out of the bathroom and do something gay and everyone will look over and be like, “Who the fuck … oh shit! It’s that Beau guy! What’s goin’ on, man?” and he’ll proceed to sweep the entire show, winning the million dollars and blowing it all on tickets to Cher farewell concerts.
Ok .. I don’t even know where to begin … Kaysar promised to shake things up and that is exactly what he did. Good for him. He is playing the game. They tried to fuck him the first week in the house and he hasn’t forgotten that. He is making good on his word to Michael to make sure that those who were responsible for kicking him out get their due and get kicked out as well. Which brings me to Eric. Who the fuck does this little Napoleanic troll think he is?! He has Ivette and Maggie mesmerized with his crap. He is an instigator. He is sanctimonious and he is dangerous b/c of his pathological behaviour. I mean please, did anyone see Kaysar swear on the Koran, like Eric seems to believe? NOPE. Didn’t happen. Did Michael really ‘sexually harrass” those girls? NOPE. Why did they start to think he did? Because Eric put the seed in their heads that what Michael did and the way he acted was really more inappropriate then it was in reality. Did Maggie look like she was gonna puke when she called Kaysar out about the Power of Veto chess game? YUP and how awesome was it when he told her point blank that he was going after her partner?! AWESOME. And the drama of Ivette … let’s hope she’s the next one out of the house. She is worshipping Eric for some unknown, sick reason and how ridiculous was she crying about how he was gonna be the next one on the chopping block? Honey, it’s a game. That’s all it is. A game. And it’s turning into one hell of a great game at that.
This is the best Big Brother episode ever. I loved to see the house get flipped upside down. Am i the only one wiling to admit that Kaysar is kinda sexy!?!
Is Eric a Fireman?
I’m not sure if they revealed that in this “Summer of Secrets”
Also, did Jennifer leave w/ Beau?
Mary (#24): I couldn’t agree more about Beau… At the end of last night’s episode I remarked about how he has really said *nothing* since the debut other than when he hosted one of the competitions. Is he seriously that dull? Even dopes like Ivette can get screen time. Maybe he only speaks Aramaic and CBS doesn’t want to pay for the translation costs.
Yaya, Kaysar is quite sexy.
Michael must be smiling watching BB6.
I loved when Ivette realized they should have evicted Kaysar instead of Ashlea. That was great. She said they evicted Ashlea because she was annoying. Apparently this is the strategy those sheeps were using. What a joke!
I agree with the other comments – this was one of the best episodes of big brother ever. In fact, it ranked pretty high in great reality show moments, period, and since we know BB is a bottom of the barrell, guilty-pleasure, Chenbotfest, that’s saying a lot. Just a great episode. Well edited, interesting developments, and the veto challenge was pretty cool.
You recapped most of the best moments but I’ll add
*Howie in the background, barely able to stop himself from cracking up during Eric’s rampage
*The way the DeCappyNators removed Maggie from the Veto Challenge, all facing her and staring her down… that was great.
oh, yeah, yaya, Kaysar is sexy! Thank Allah LOST is on sabbaticalfor the summer so he could do BB…What? That’s some OTHER hot Iraqui?! Whatever; I could look at him all day long…*sigh*
for some reason, i read eddiebosox’s comment as giving ashlea a “golden shower of veto”, which is actually funny on a whole ‘nother level.
And Eric is like a freaking 12 year old Dungeons and Dragons fan with all his firefighter crap. hes got the hats, the jerseys, the t-shirts, the boxers, the commemorative plates, the big neon sign he hangs above his head at all times “ask me about my job and/or family”. And then he goes on and on and on about the brotherhood of firefighers. Jesus. we GET IT. youre a FIREFIGHTER. Whoop de fucking do.
Did anyone else notice that after Kaysar talked with Rachel, he stood up and made it obvious that he was going commando under his scrubs? Woof!
we like to joke that Eric travels across the country in his spare time, spending just enough time in each city to visit the local firefighter paraphenelia store and buy out the lot.
i’m with those who think beau is the one to watch. either there is so much scheme that any of beau’s flamboyant antics just don’t make the cut for the CBS shows, or he is truly playing the smartest game in the house. then again, if I were Ivette’s partner, i’d run far and fast too.
I think Beau is just dull. Not every gay guy can be as outrageous as Marcellus or as endearing as Will. Of course, with Ivette around, he probably can’t get a word in edgewise…
I noticed April’s neck last night–she HAS to be older than her posted age…jeezus!
Great recap- my coworkers were wondering what I was laughing about over my lunch break. Seeing Capolean squirm as his two top sheep were knocked out of the veto contest – PRICELESS. Two questions
1) Anyone else think that Capolean looks like Hugo Weaving playing Agent Smith in those 3 roid rage shots?
2) How in God’s name does Eric play hockey, midget that he is?
Can’t wait until Thursday when Eric gets to be all sanctimonious and whip out his Torah in front of the Chenbot. Or go into a roid rage and give her a Todd Bertuzzi.
What a great episode! Reading all of the pre-season posts about Big Brother was the only reason I decided to watch this season. I am sooooo hooked.
Good call, pooch. I thought for sure there would be a screen shot of that interaction.
I heart Big Brother.
I am just waiting for Marwan to show up and blow the house up while Jack is erecting a hard perimeter around Crappy….
Super recap….AGAIN!!!
Any chance that the Las Vegas FD confiscate all of their clothes due to massive embarrassement??
Allez! Votez !!
I kelly, kelly, kelly this show. Great summer entertainment. Kaysar is not only intelligent but he is HOT! He is playing the game. Eric is pissed off because he knows he’s been outplayed, out- manuevered and outsmarted (not real difficult) by Kaysar. Boo-hoo
loved this episode!!! michael must be thrilled to be watching his partner single handedly turn the house upside down. kaysar is purely genius & i love watching the rest of the house squirm. what are they gonna do with dear cappy gone??? lord knows the won’t be able to play the game & forget that they came into the house with a partner, they’re losing their best friend!! yeah, i bet beau feels so special with ivette crying like a baby that eric is leaving. i hope the 6 actuall make it to the final 6, but with the other people in the house, i don’t think that should be too hard. it seems like they’re all just falling apart since eric was the brains of the operation. i use the term brains very very loosely. jennifer & april are idiots, ivette is too heartbroken that eric will be gone, beau is non-existent, & maggie, well maggie is just boring. i see beau as the 7th person, the others will hopefully be picked off one by one. but don’t forget, it’s the summer of secrets, so maybe someone is coming back like amy from a few seasons ago!! summer of secrets!
oh & i agree, kaysar is pretty hot. not to mention he has great taste in clothing, expensive too. we know those lacoste polos are like 70 bucks a pop. love him!
Maggie IS so boring and is it just me or does it seem that her face is getting LONGER as the show goes on?
Did anyone else have flashbacks of Al Pacino in Godfather 2 when Kaysar was organizing the alliance? How about a Godfather remake with Kaysar as Michael Corleone, Janelle as the consigliare Tom, and Howie as the idiot brother Fredo?
So long Eric, and thanks for all the fish.
copygodd, “Golden Shower of Veto” is soo much funnier.
Damn me and my feeble unfunny brain!
How great was this episode!!! I would like to go on the record saying I always liked James and I am so glad he got saved this week. Woo woo!!..here I am doing a happy dance…when Kaysar told Maggie I was so excited…L-O-V-E looooved it!!! Finally the show is what it should be…
Rachyo~ (#31) cute nickname, but I was thinking more like “duhcrappynators”!! Timbob3461 great casting!!!!
Agree with all of you…Great recap and one of the best episodes EVER!!! Between b-sides good work and the editors of BB6 it will make a hot sultry summer bearable!!!
Indeed yaya, Kaysar gets sexier every episode. Mental competence is hot.
I love when they come up with a plan that actually works. It is so satisfying. But for all the strategizing to boot the evil gnome, wouldn’t it have just been easier to provoke him until he took a swing at somebody and let the producers yank him for violence, like the guy the first week of BB4. It wouldn’t have taken much more than what happened in last weeks throw down.
And here’s hoping they can hold this new alliance together long enough to boot the think tank that is April and Ivette.
I too am loving the recaps! I mean Kelleying! I think it was season 1 when the planes toting messages were all the rage. Why’d that stop? Also …didn’t the audience vote people off season 1? Just wonderin’.
Am I the only one who has noticed the sideburns on Ivette? Seriously, is it just me or does she have a set of mutton chops forming that would make James Hetfield proud?
I started watching BB last year and between then and this season, I don’t think I had seen an episode where one of the contestants did not have one scene, one word said in an episode……Beau did not appear once in the entire episode Tuesday…..sure in the background a few times, but not one word was said by him.
Is this the first time this happened?
Yvette does have sideburns.
This was one of the best big brother episodes in a looong time. I love it when the tables turn on the groups I hate the most (Crappy Eric, Yvette, April and that other bitch).
Kaysar and James were looking quite sexy, at certain angles anyway, I’d say YES to a 3 way, even though James looks a little downs syndrome-ish! You know KatiesHole, I love it anyway I can get it!
Also, Janelle is just getting more awesome, love how they just went after the other 2 dopes (yvette, maggie) in the chess game.
I vote for a Kaysar/ Janelle hook-up…..but Kaysar’s family would probably blow her up the minute she walks out of the house. Y’know….ALLAH lovers ONLY!!!!!
So does that mean that Janelle will break up with Michael on TV as well??
Secrets I wish for:
1. Beau & Jennifer have been kidnapped, and no one has noticed. There will be a ransom note later, probably involving some competition that must be won, but everyone will refuse to participate.
2. Beau & Ivette are actually straight and dating each other – they are truly an embarrassment as representatives of “The Gays”.
The look of Ivette, Maggie and Eric as they were pinched out of moves on the chess board were timeless classics.
I didn’t care for Kayser the first week or two because BB was painting him as “religion guy” as they did to the twins last summer.
My wife and I concluded that praying five times a day is to your advantage because you’re up before everyone which gives you more time to plot
Go K!
From the beginning I liked Kaysar and James. I don’t miss Michael. I thought he was immature and obnoxious. No control at all. Janelle has grown on me. One of my favorites now. Still can’t stand Howie, Rachel and Sarah, but I’m glad Kaysar, Janelle and James have their alliance they needed.
I *thought* I remembered there being someone named Jennifer in the house from the first week. Do you suppose she’s been locked in another secret room for 10 days and no one has noticed?
Okay, James, you’ve redeemed yourself for now. Good job. I might actually like you if it weren’t for the New Balance shoes you were wearing at the Veto competition.
There is so much going on that it feels like end-of-August Big Brother. I keep forgetting there are so many players left. Every now and then they show Beau or Jennifer or even April, and I’m like “Oh, right! She’s still here!”.
Speaking of the Veto, I love that everyone in the house was a huge chess-geek.
I can’t wait to see how the house changes when Sir Eric is gone. Maybe Maggie has a personality under all those Cappy-supporting comments! Once she’s done having to bow down to her Master, she’ll be more likeable. The only thing worse than an idiot is his follower. Hmm. . . Maybe I should be nice to the best friend of my future “brother”-in-law. That’s right, yaya, he’s mine.
What’s with Jennifer’s “experience with black light”? She’s totally CSI Plano, Texas (Ranger? Too much?).
PS Has anyone seen the homosexual picture of Kaysar, James and Eric on the CBS homepage? What the hell are they doing with the hands?
EROSion,
I don’t know, but it is the hands I don’t see that scares me even more!
ha!
I feel like the biggest dork in the world saying this, but that episode was GREAT!!! I really thought this season was going to be boring as hell but I was wrong.
Does anyone else think that that the producers may keep a little bag of tricks under wraps just in case it starts getting boring? Think about it, no one has any damn idea what’s in the safe, ChenBot keeps dropping vague hints about never knowing what’s going to happen, etc. If Eric and his followers were to go and the alliance of the six was to stay together, playing clean and fair, don’t think for a second they aren’t going to throw Eric or Ivette back in. They did it a few years ago.
How long have you been waiting to use the Deep Blue joke? It was awesome, just fucking perfect. I love the Summer of Secrets
is anyone else worried that rachel is going to mess things up with the alliance? she seems like she is pretty friendly with the annoying girls of the house, and i definitely got the vibe that she was only agreeing with kaysar because it was her best option at the time. hopefully she wont flip sides until after eric is out though, since he is definitely hard to listen to without wanting to throw things at my tv.
Okay, so in comment #24 I went going on and on about how Beau is completely non-existent, but then I read stuff about this mysterious character named “Jennifer.” Who the fuck is that? Seriously. I’m pretty sure I didn’t even know there was someone in the house named Jennifer. Who is she partnered with? Is there any way to remember her (like how Beau is the toke gay dude)? I cant believe the producers completely leave people out like this? Is it because they want to surprise us late by being like, “Oh oh oh! Remember THIS person? Wooooo!”
I don’t like Rachel but to backstab the alliance at this point would be to turn on Howie. I don’t see her doing that, even though I don’t know how truely close Rachel and Howie are considering they said they hadn’t even seen eachother for years. It’s once the final 6 knocks of the others that Rachel might become a problem.
I was ecstatic last night as Kaysar’s delicious feast was presented for all to eat.
My problem is that I don’t completely trust that Erprick is gone for good. Chenbot gave away the likelihood that one or more of the departed will get a chance to return in the Ashlea departure interview. My bet is that the Crappies will be given an option to bring him back.
Oh yeah…anybody notice that Erprick, when he was nominated, failed to immediately plea for the house to save Maggie? An honorable man would have told themn to vote him off so his partner could be spared. Kind of like a fireman’s creed – one for all/I got your back. Not from our boy. Wah, wah, wah!
This is only the third week! I wasn’t really ready for this level of drama yet. Total opposite of last summer, when the bullies kept control and we had to wait far too long for the first Horseman to get ousted.
Kaysar’s strategy was amazing. I’m so surprised there’s an alliance of decent people with a very good chance of ousting all the bullies.
I’m gay, and I don’t even like Ivette or Beau. I prefer my gay contestants to have some character, like Will.
Now, it could get interesting in either direction. Either we get to watch with glee as the Six Horsemen oust the bullies one by one… or, for even more Drama, see Ivette get HOH next week and get another flip…
I love this show! I was rooting for Kaysar for no other reason than because he’s handsome and now I hope that someone in his alliance wins HOH next because Eric’s minions will definately put him up.
idini,
i feel you re: rachel. she’s keeping her options open. i don’t think she’ll flip, though–eric is a loose cannon, and, like ellen said, she won’t screw over howie, and he’s definitely ready to see eric out. the beauty of rachel’s situation is that she’s under the radar–if one of eric’s lackeys wins HOH, they will nominate kaysar and/or james and/or janelle; if one of the new alliance of six wins, they’ll put up ivette and/or bo and/or maggie. rachel is safe for at least two weeks because she’s not in the middle of the drama.
rachel and james are the strongest players, because they keep their options open and know when to jump alliances. the worst mistake you can make in BB seems to be to get comfortable in an alliance–they always crumble, even when the people involved act like grown-ups instead of pouty little brats like eric and ivette.
was just watching the new made- nothing else is on. anyways, beau was on there with some dog named peanut helping the girl pick out outfits…just thought it was worth mentioning.
don’t sweat it, ebosox. my brain is pretty feeble and unfunny without a trip to the glass-lined tanks of old latrobe.
33!
this really has nothing to do with anything, but i was watching MADE on mtv tonight & who should be on the episode but our resident BB6 non-existent cast member beau!! it was in southbeach or something and he was a personal shopper for the girl. looks like he’s getting action on a different show.
Katie, saw Made … Beau was actually out of hiding .. must be b/c his ‘friend’ Ivette was no where to be found to embarrass the shit out of him. And he was actually quite animated … something that has yet to be seen in the house.
I am astonished that among all the posters, none have suggested the obvious: kayser is a ‘stand-in’ for all the middle-eastern people we’ve come to distrust, and cappy [as you call him] is a representative of the brave defenders/resuers at 9/11? personally, I know in my heart of hearts that there is no comparison, however I like the imagery … not all moslems are bad, except when threatened by an imperious western power? hopefully middle america will think about all this and find some way to recognize that we’re all bozos on this bus [as the dear firesign theater proposed years ago] and we’ll let the mighteous right prevail [even if it's not in our own best interst temporarily?] I’m anxiously awaiting future developments, and hope it does not devolve into something approaching the IRAQ foolishness we’re currently witness to. good night to all, and to awl, a good knight.
philip, are you saying that 9/11 was justified??? Sadly, Osama Bin Laden thinks just like little Kaysar, that thats how he planned these disgusting attacks so well. BTW, Cappy is a PC Liberal, I don’t consider him to be a 9/11 defender, I see him as a stupid moron and he needs to leave the house. I hope Kaysar doesn’t win either, I really hope that his evil strategy doesn’t prevail. That would be a really sad ending if it does.
philip21, of course we know that Muslims aren’t all bad. Eric is a shitty person just like a lot of other white guys in the western world. BTW, Kaysar is an American too.
chenbot,
kaysar has a evil strategy?? what is that?? playing the game? last time i checked, big brother was a game & the object is to get to the end. he hasn’t done anything different than past big brother contestants aside from being upfront when asked what he was doing. that sure is evil, you know, letting people know what you’re going to do. damn that kaysar!
Posters 74 & 75, You won’t believe this but I saw Beau on The Cut last night. Tommy H. had a huge party on a boat in Miami with all these fashiony artsy types and Beau was chillin on a sofa in the background. How strange is it that one person can be on 3 “reality” shows. Aren’t CBS and MTV owed by Viacom, hmmmmmmm?
Camrock:
Season one, the audience did call in to vote for people, much like American Idol. What was happening though was that whole towns were staging “call ins” and voting for one person to stay. It made for a HUGELY boring season b/c it made the houseguests band together. They had no reason to fight, argue, scheme, etc, b/c getting evicted was TOTALLY out of their hands. Instead, it became one big love/snooze fest. CBS also was running the show FIVE times a week, which was lethal b/c the houseguests were BORING!!!
Can us gay guys trade in Beau for Kaysar? Please?
Oh, and CBS had Season 1′s house in some lot where the general public had relatively close access and it somehow got leaked out as to where it was. SO not only did we get planes with banners spreading gossip about the houseguests, the houseguests could actually HEAR people chanting on the other side of the wall. When they were evicted, a huge door would open and they would be sent out to meet their loved ones in the midst of these huge public crowds…
Thanks, Pooch!!
Kaysar isn’t that smart…it was Janelle that told him to put up Maggie and James! Kaysar didn’t come up with that idea!
Cassio310: What we saw was Janelle verbalize what Kaysar was thinking. He was going through it step by step out loud and when he got to the end of his thought process, that is when Janelle said “So you put up James and Maggie”. So in fact, Kaysar DID come up with the idea and Janelle, being the smartie that she is, got it immediately and put it into words.
Kaysar! Yeah, let’s trade the ‘too quiet, too fabulous’ Beau for Kaysar! Kayser’s really sexy. Evil? Hardly ust playing it the way it should be, shifting alliances and forging new ones. But I don’t think he’s a dirty player, unlike the trollish Eric.
BTW I find the picture of James, Kaysar and Eric on the CBS website pretty odd, and as someone on here wrote ‘gay’. Why? Well in Turkey when you make that hand signal that they’re making it’s a derogatory way to refer to a homosexual. Basically the opening of the thumb and forefinger refers to an anus (in Turkish it’s referred to a ‘Tekerlek’ or wheel, use your imagination). The bigger the opening indicates how homosexual someone might be. Note in the picture Erik’s is much bigger than J’s or K’s…
Kaysar should know this he’s been to Turkey and in fact it may be a symbol known throughout the Middle East.
damn time warner cable to hell. their shitty dvr caused me to miss big bro on sat AND tues. luckily, my new pc with windows media center arrived and i was able to bypass TIME WARNER CABLE’S ASSWIPE OF A DVR and record tonight’s bb6 episode. after missing the fights and assorted drama. damn time warner cable to hell. again.
(this post not affiliated with microsoft windows media center.)
ok I see myself running around giving that sign to every other man on the North side. Fortunately I don’t live in San Fran.
All of the people (viewers and Eric, Ivette, April, etc.) who think Kaysar, James, and Janelle are “evil,” “dishonest,” or lacking in “integrity” for strategizing need to get a grip. When you play poker, even with good friends, you bluff (a form of strategically misleading other players) and no one hates you or moralizes about it, because it is within the bounds and rules of the game and they know to watch out for it. When you play a reality tv show game, why does everyone suddenly think that playing it better than someone else is wrong and immoral and that the others aren’t to blame for not figuring it out in time? I bluff very well in poker, so I will never play it with the types of whiners and spoilsports who rage against game players like Kaysar and James!
Sorry I erred…..James and Kaysar’s ‘Tekerlekler’ (or wheels) are much bigger than tight assed Eric….figuratively speaking.
In any case, Erik – What a wanker….
Is it me or does James sort of remind you of the cowboy from last season? I mean during one his interviews the way he sat and talked and his mannerism all he needed was a hat.
1) B-Side, you are the shit. I like all the Tvgasm family, but you’re my favorite recapper. Keep up the great work.
2) And YES — much of the new music is bearable, but I can’t believe they got rid of the gray-to-color music. That little sound clip was my favorite, and I’m a little crazy, so I now just insert that audio mentally over whatever inferior music they have running.
Thanks alon and to everyone else. I appreciate the compliments.
How did James end up with such a hottie anyway? Maybe he demeaned his way into her heart? He is to her self-confidence what sugar is to your gas tank. By the way, when the Eviction Bus comes roaring through, fully expect James to throw Sarah under the tires if he has the opportunity. If he wins HOH, do you think you’ll hear “I decide to use the veto on Sophie, I mean Charlotte, wait… I mean Sarah!” The prospect of the fallout from either Sarah or James winning veto is the only thing that made me happy Howie didn’t back door James. Then again, as horny as Howie is, when Rachel suggested Howie backdoor James there was a fleeting moment of consideration and/or confusion.
If Sarah wins veto, she will take James off the block…
Enjoy peeps!
Oh, by the way b-side… That was entertaining to read… Keep it up man, you have me hooked!
Wow, Kaysar is back in with what was it, 82 or 83% of the votes?!? Cool beans!
Eric had no honor. Not every firefighter is honorable, there are a few bad apples and I’ll bet Eric is low man at his house. Didn’t realize how short he was – or is it that Kaysar is quite a bit taller than average? till they were standing outside of the BB house waiting for the decision.
Ivette makes my skin crawl. Ghetto this and ghetto that…she is obnoxious and a backstabber. So glad Eric didn’t come back into the game…can’t stand Maggie either…she is a power hungry witch…although if Eric did come back, she had made the comment she would have to fight Ivette to get to him as he came through the door…what did she say that Ivette would be on Eric like Saran Wrap??? hehehehehe..while it would have been funny, I can do without that visual.
I think that it would be great to put Maggie and Ivette up next. Of course it all depends with what happened in ‘pressure cooker’ the HOH challenge…If Maggie and Ivette went up I would be hard pressed to decide which should go first, although seeing Ivette go would keep James from doing much as she is the only one who might take his side and bring her girlfriend Beau with her into a odd triangle of sexual disfunction.
If Maggie goes bye-bye the glue holding together that little ‘friends’ aliance is gone, Howie/Rachel/Kaysar/Janelle can then easilly pick off the rest if they can keep the next three HOH competitions on their side. I realy don’t care which of the four win, as long as it isn’t any of the others.
Kaysar and Janelle – either of them would be really cool to see win as they would be doing it without a ‘partner’ in the game since the beginning.
Another subject—Ashleah (sp?)…what happened with her and leaving sequester? What a moron, they did give hints that there might be a way to continue… subtle, but there.
If Eric came back I likely would have stopped watching… it would have been too disgusting to think that America saw him rant and rave and act like a little girl and then rewarded him for that.
Oh well…wonder what the next ‘secret’ will be…have more than a month to go… any ideas?