Getting The Hang Of It

Big Brother

By B-Side | Monday, August 7, 2006 | 9:25 am | 38 Comments

danielle01080606Okay, I’m gonna be honest. I know the weekend episodes of Big Brother aren’t supposed to be that thrilling, but tonight’s show was a bit, uh, slow. You know me. I love my Big Brother and will be hard-pressed to ever say anything against the House that Chen Built, but I just wasn’t that into this latest hour. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I’m tired and hung over or something like that. Or maybe it’s because compared to the weave-pullin’, pants-poopin’ antics of Flavor of Love, an afternoon pizza party in the Big Brother compound seemed a bit tame. Whatever the reason, my inner snark-o-tron was not going off as expected.

That’s not to say there wasn’t fun stuff this hour. Oh no. There’s always a handful of fun times in the household, especially when there’s a new person in charge. Going into this show, we were left wondering who would win the latest HOH endurance competition. Would season six remain in power? Or would someone else finally take the reins? But most importantly: would anyone ever be able to explain why a hungry spider spews shaving cream?This week’s show began with the gang still hanging out in that spider web which Julie Chen so happily introduced to us this past Thursday. The object of the exercise was for people to hang out on the ropes — the last one on would win Head of Household. This didn’t sound very difficult, but keep in mind that this web tilted a little bit! And sometimes swayed! Hardcore!

Erika then came on screen and told us, “I was not going to give up until I won.” Yes, Erika, that sounds all fine and good, but perhaps you didn’t anticipate the latest twist in this game: the random, unexplained spider jizz. Yes, attentive viewers from Thursday’s show will certainly remember the Chenbot telling the house guests, “And I see that the spider’s getting a little hungry; so I think we need to whet its appetite.” This was then followed by a deluge of shaving cream and other white, gooey substances. Two questions. A) If the spider is hungry, why must we whet its appetite? Isn’t the whole point of whetting an appetite to arouse one’s eagerness? If the spider is already hungry, there’s no need to try to make it hungrier. It’s already hungry! It’s a hungry spider! B) What spider spews any sort of jizz-like substance when hungry? Normally, I’d say this spider was merely bulimic, but the purging usually comes after the meal. Clearly, this entire spider endeavor was poorly thought out. Shame on whoever supplied the Chenbot with this silly spider narration.

Okay. Glad we got that out of the way. It was really bothering me. Anyway, with the spider splooging (and shrieking at the same time. Don’t want to even touch those Freudian issues), Marcellas commented, “The HOH competition was actually really fun until they started squirting the shaving cream or whatever the hell that was. It ruined another belt, which I’m invoicing Big Brother for!” Lesson Marcellas should have learned four years ago: only wear Target brand accessories on reality TV.

After some time, the spider web tilted dramatically, causing Will to say, “Hey, um, Boogie, just so I can make sure, I’m a 33 year-old doctor on a big, giant spider web, right?” Perhaps the proper question should have been, “Hey, um, Boogie, just so I can make sure, I’m a 33 year-old doctor who clearly wasn’t smart enough to anticipate the potentially ridiculous situations I could face on a summer reality show, right?”

Anyway, as far as endurance competitions go, this one was not the jewel in Big Brother‘s crown. Everyone was basically chilling out, with Marcellas going so far as to pose on the ropes for an imaginary camera. Since it didn’t look like anyone would be dropping anytime soon, we then went back and relived Diane’s not-so-shocking departure last week. As you can imagine, all the floaters were pissed about the way things went down under Janelle’s reign as Head of Household. Marcellas was annoyed. Danielle was angry. James was livid. You know, all the usual stuff. Diane’s eviction brought great sadness to the household, but at least Will was there to liven things up. He embraced Erika and said, “Hug it out, bitch!” Bold move by CBS. Allowing an Entourage quote the very same night that it aired. Of course, I’m probably the only one amused by this little dash of Ari Gold irony; so I’ll just move on.

Well, Erika was thrilled to have escaped eviction, and even though she was bummed that Diane had to go, she happily noted, “But I got TO STAY!!!!” And with that, she leaned back in her diary-room chair and kicked the air. Shockingly, this did not cause her to then choke up and cry.

We then returned to the present where Howie was busy clapping his hands together and yelling, “Big boy likes spider sperm!” And yes, you can rank that as one of the most unlikely phrases to ever air on CBS. It was actually pretty funny, if only because the house guests were similarly confused by the entire spider ejaculate simulation the producers were so intent on portraying.

Anyway, Will and Howie shared some barbs, and then we headed into a Howie montage as we saw just how much he eats on a regular basis. Believe me, this was not a shocker. The guy’s stomach has been ballooning outwards at such a rapid pace that I’m pretty sure he’s already been booked on Celebrity Fit Club 5 with Alfonso Ribeiro and Harriet from Small Wonder.

So what does it take to sate Hurricane Howie’s ravenous appetite? If you answered “Four Philly cheese steak sandwiches,” you’d be on the right track. Yes, Chicken George actually whipped up for of the tasty sandwiches, and Howie ate them all at once; although, to be fair, they were sort of on the small side. It was more like Howie had really only consumed two full-sized Philly cheese steaks, not that that’s any better. Dr. Will was moved to comment that Howie’s cholesterol was like that of a hippopotamus, which was interesting because I didn’t know that hippopotami were known for their strikingly high cholesterol. Then again, they are quite hungry, hungry.

Anyway, somewhere along the line, Will started calling Howie “big boy,” which was quite Gordon Ramsay-ish of him and certainly sweeter than his other moniker, “bloated, half-dead, diabetic manatee.” But enough about Star Jones Reynolds. Rimshot! Oh, I had to do it.

This was all fun and games, but later, Danielle had a heart-to-heart with Jedi Howie and alerted him that he’d put on an alarming amount of pounds. It had gotten to the point where he’d formed a “FUPA body.” Whatever may come of this conversation, I’m just happy that “FUPA” has finally reached network TV. Bravo, CBS.

Well, the two had a touching moment, and after Howie promised to eat better and stay away from the ice cream (which he promptly ate two seconds later), we returned to the web where one person asked, “Did someone just fart?” Chicken George then replied with a defeated and sorrowful, “Yeaaahhh.” Man, he really just surrendered to that. He could have kept his mouth quiet, let Howie take the blame. But I guess that’s not the way George plays. He’s an honest man, and if someone accuses him of farting, gosh darnit, he will proudly ‘fess up to it!

Anyway, twenty-eight minutes into this webby challenge, Will dropped out, citing a desire to walk around. The good news was that he could satisfy his raging wanderlust. The bad news was that the egg he opened up (remember? There were five Alien-ish eggs waiting to be opened for the first people to drop down) contained nothing but yellow gunk. No prize for Will.

For whatever reason, Boogie then came on screen to babble about whatever. I don’t remember what he was saying because I was too distracted by his grammatically worrisome shirt. It read “Im Rich B****!” which was lame for several reasons. First and most obviously, it was a tired retread of a Chappelle’s Show quote. Second, there was a mild comma omission after the word “Rich,” and lastly, the missing apostrophe for “Im” was borderline unforgivable. Basically, it was like an overwrought ironic-T with typos. The only thing worse would have been if he had worn a shirt that said, “Jesus Is My Hoamboy” or “Everybody Love’s A Spicy Latina” or “Gettin’ Lucky In Kintucky.”

Anyway, we soon found out the real reason why Will had dropped off the web so quickly was because he wanted a little one-on-one time with Janelle, who wasn’t competing since she was the outgoing HOH. The two chatted in the kitchen about the status of the house and alliances and whatnot, and at one point, Janelle asked, “Think the rest of the house is mad at me?”

“No!” Will replied.

“Seriously?” she replied back. Oh, poor, naive Janelle. Whatever happened to the smart, manipulative girl we knew and loved so much? This couldn’t be the same woman. She was falling for Will’s game hook, line, and sinker. She even believed him when he said that he, Boogie, Janelle, and Howie would all protect each other in the upcoming weeks. Little did she know that the “Legion of Doom” was already arming for battle. And yes, I’ll explain the Legion of Doom later.

Well, at two hours into the web competition, Janelle walked outside and informed the players that they’d now have to change positions. Everyone’s head and torso now had to be below the web, meaning that everyone had to dangle from their arms and legs. You know, like the way we expected this challenge to be before it turned into HammockFest 2006. Well, everyone changed positions, and immediately there was exciting drama as James’s feet swung below him, bringing his HOH hopes into intense jeopardy. What would happen??

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We then went to commercial where for a few minutes, we pondered James’s fate, and when we returned, we saw him still dangling. Luckily for him, he found some inner-strength (or at least he’d been using the Ab-Lounge), and he yanked his feet back up on the web. Crisis averted! For at least two minutes, at least. Next thing we knew, after all that, James had had enough, and he dropped down to the net below. Sadly, he was out of the running, but at least he got to pick an egg, and what was his reward? The ability to nullify one eviction vote. Could be very useful (provided that we ever get a vote that’s not unanimous or close to it).

A few minutes later, Boogie reached his limits, and with a few loud, annoying screams, he fell from the web (and then continued to scream a little more). Kaysar soon followed, leaving Howie as the only season sixer left. But first: egg time! Boogie managed to win ten thousand dollars for himself, and Kaysar got… nothing. Wah wah wah. He can’t even pick eggs properly! Anyway, this meant that there was only one egg left, and inside was a slop pass. You’d think that Chicken George would be the first off the ropes, but he steadfastly refused to quit, despite his roommates’ pleas. As a result, Marcellas dropped next and won the pass. He was so frustrated that he kicked the broken egg shell, causing a shocked James to yell, “Marcellas!” THERE SHALL BE NO EGG KICKING!!

Sadly for Chicken George, his attempt for the HOH crown was all in vain because he soon dropped about a minute later, which meant he might as well have gone for that slop pass while he had the chance. This left only three people on the web (Erika, Danielle, and Howie), and while season six technically still had a shot, we knew there was no way that “Big Boy” was gonna be able to fight gravity much longer. At one point, Danielle reprimanded Howie for shaking the ropes so much with his movements, which got me thinking that Howie should have merely shook the other two off. They would have dropped like dead leaves. But alas, we can only expect so much from Hurricane Howie.

Anyway, it looked like it was gonna be all over for Danielle as she lowered her legs and said she was out, but dunh dunh DUNH! She suddenly had a surge of will power and put herself back on the web. She was gonna finish this bad boy out! Howie, on the other hand, was reaching his breaking point. Erika and Danielle told him he’d be safe if he dropped, and if there’s anything Howie should have learned from last season, it was that people are always so trustworthy during these endurance competitions. Nevertheless, the big oaf fell, leaving just the two girls.

“Erika. Erika, give it to me,” Danielle pleaded.

“You got it, Dan,” she responded, happily hopping off the web. Hey, what happened to “I wasn’t going to give up until I won”? Oh well. I guess Erika didn’t want the HOH target on her back. This meant that for the first time ever, I believe, Danielle had won Head of Household. This was bad news for season six, but for the viewers, a much needed change of pace. I kind of wanted Chill Town in power, just to really shake things up (and prove to season six how dumb they’ve been), but Danielle was sure to cause some major damage, and I was happy to finally get a new regime in power.

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“I’m the black widow!!!” she yelled in triumph as she descended from her web. It was a nifty little nickname, especially when she said she wanted to catch some houseflies (you know the insane fan boards are just eating that up. Oh wait, I guess we are an insane fan board). Moments later, we then learned of the “Legion of Doom!” which at first seemed like a tongue-in-cheek joke she and James had created to describe their alliance with Will and Boogie. I began to chuckle, but then when I realized that they were calling themselves that in earnest, my laughter quickly transformed into intense eye-rolling. First “The Four Horsemen.” Then “The Friendship.” Now “Legion of Doom”?? (I won’t even deign to mention “The Santa Monica Van Boys”.) I would have suggested the Confederacy of Ill-Repute and Scandalous Affairs, but I guess that’s too wordy (however, the acronym would have been the more efficient, CIRSA).

After the break, we then found Dr. Will ambling through the house, complaining of intense back pain. Apparently, after Boogie had won ten grand, Will had tried to pick him up as part of a victory celebration. However, because Mike Malin is so incredibly obese, Dr. Will’s back gave out, thus making it the second victory celebration for Chill Town that’s ended in embarrassing injury. The good news was that Kaysar was willing to crack his back (in a good way), but his chiropractic skills were highly questionable. “I saw a chiropractor crack someone’s back once, and I figured, what the heck? I’ll give it a try,” Kaysar said. Sounds good to me! Hey, I once saw this doctor perform an appendectomy on TV. That pretty much certifies me for surgery. Step right up, people!

Anyway, despite his highly impressive background, all Kaysar managed to do was create an incredibly intense homoerotic situation. Danielle then tries to give it a whirl, but she became too distracted by some sort of bizarre hump in Will’s back. Eventually, Kaysar gave it a second try, this time using a sheet to cover up Will’s pale, bare-chested torso, but alas, it seemed as though no massage could cure the good doctor. Amidst all this, I was just shocked that Boogie didn’t jump at the chance to molest his master. You know he’d been waiting all season long for the perfect opportunity.

Later, season six all hung out on their beds, and James tried to make Janelle feel badly about her picks the week before. “We are all going to reap the repercussions,” he said passive-aggressively. Janelle said she’d probably go up against Marcellas, and if she did, she’d have the votes to stay, right guys? Right? Yeah, not sure about that. Your alliance kind of hates you.

A vengeful James then showed up in the Diary Room and said of Janelle, “This Anna Nicole Smith wannabe is probably the dumbest person to ever play this game.” Ouch. Does his mother with her gigantic crucifix know that he speaks this way? He’ll be in for a lashing!

Upstairs, it was time to see Danielle’s new HOH room. The color scheme was a merciful change from Janelle’s hideous Pink Palace, the producers opting to use all brown and lime green colors. Among all her luxury items, Danielle received a letter from her mom, which meant we had to listen to a nice albeit boring ode to Danielle from her family. She then cried in the Diary Room about how much she loved her mom, and the entire sequence was capped off by George saying in his drunken way, “You! Go! Girl!” Make that man an honorary sistah right now!

In an unexpected treat, the producers then gave the houseguests all sorts of pizza, which was awesome for everyone; everyone but George, that is. He instead sat on his bed and stared at dust (which just so happened to be his favorite activity going into the game). Feeling guilty and charitable, Marcellas then walked in and gave him his slop pass. The Chicken Man refused to take it, but eventually, he grabbed the pass and walked into the kitchen where he announced again that he would not be using it. He made a deal, dammit, and he was going to uphold it. 60 days with all slop. But eventually, he realized that he kind of wanted that pizza and stuff; so with a lump in his throat, he accepted Marcellas’s kind gift and began to chow down. This led to some cheesy editing as George and Marcellas shared appreciative glances in slow-motion, and even though I never saw The Legend of Bagger Vance, this is how I imagined a really lame version of it would be.

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Afterwards, Danielle summoned James over to her bed and said, “James, I have an idea that I think you’re not going to be happy about.” Uh oh. She wanted to put up floaters too? No. Even worse. She wanted to put up James. Yikes! Her logic was that if she put up Janelle, she didn’t want her to win the veto. This way, James, the veto king, was guaranteed to play and hopefully win. Besides, such a move would cast doubt on their alliance. It was a risky proposition, and James was certainly not happy with it (especially since competing for the veto in this household was considerably harder than going up against the likes of Maggie, April, and Ivette). But hey, it would all be worth it to get rid of Janelle, at least according to James. After all, “she’s not the same girl she was last year. She’s like a fat piece of shit this year.” Okay, I’m enjoying his bitterness, but some of us are still lighting a candle for Janelle. Don’t be dissin’ my girl!

As we went to commercial break, Danielle noted, “I know you’re going to be okay.” WARNING! WARNING! Danger ahead for the Legion of Doom!!!

When we returned, we found Marcellas telling Danielle who he’d put up on the block: Kaysar and Janelle, despite the fact that she’s his girl. The producers probably wanted to portray his duplicitous nature, but honestly, just this past week, Janelle told Julie Chen that she’d cut Marcellas before her alliance; so I didn’t think it was so bad for him to betray her like that. That didn’t stop Danielle, however, from saying, “Marcellas is throwing Janelle under a semi with a bus with ten pounds of cement and he’s standing on top of it.” Honestly, at that point, how much of a difference does ten pounds of cement really make?

We then headed up to Danielle’s HOH room where she was now talking to Kaysar. Conveniently for Pepperidge Farm, there was a giant bag of Double Chunk cookies prominently placed on a table, perfectly angled for the camera. Shut up, PRODUCT PLACEMENT… delicious, savory product placement. Must buy Pepperidge Farm victuals… Mmmm… Milanos…. Orange Milanos… GENEVAS (okay, I’m starving now).

Anyway, Danielle wanted to speak with Kaysar because he was sort of like her homey. There were only two people she got honest answers from in the household: Kaysar and herself. Well, she had better not get too cozy with that whole “Honesty” idea because she asked him “Did you have a deal with Chill Town?” and he replied, “No.” And for those of you keeping score at home, that would be a lie. She then asked, “Did Janelle have a deal with Chill Town?” And again, Kaysar lied, “No.”

Unfortunately for Kaysar, being a religious man was really working against his game because he could barely keep the ruse up when pressed with the simplest questions. Danielle wanted to know why Janelle didn’t nominate both members of Chill Town, causing Kaysar to pause a while before letting out an, “Um…” He then added, “Hold on, let me think of a story. I mean, DOH!”

Okay, he didn’t say that, but he did say, “I believe if…” which was followed by general muttering, which trailed off into silence. Note to Danielle: when people say “I believe” and their eyes get all shifty and look away, chances are they’re lying or covering something up. Nevertheless, Danielle had other thing to tend to, namely, letting Kaysar know that she wasn’t very tight with James at all. He seemed to believe her, and as he left the room, she told us, “I need to make sure someone from Season Six walks out that door.” See? That’s what it’s all about. Simple, simple strategy. None of this junk about getting rid of floaters and yada yada yada. It’s about eliminating the direct threats.

We then went to commercial again, and in a delightful surprise, CBS let us relive that glorious scene from last season when The Friendship cried their eyes out upon losing America’s Choice. This year’s been quite fun, but seeing those clips from last season just reminded me of how glorious season six was. I have one word for you, CBS: DVD!!

After the break, we then were treated to the weekly montage of an HOH pondering which keys to put in the box. Various house guests weighed in with their thoughts on the situation, but no one said anything interesting; so let’s just get to the nomination ceremony. Danielle told the assembled group that after last week’s nominations and veto ceremony, she’d rather be safe than sorry (way to go, Janelle). You know, just two weeks ago, Danielle and Marcellas were totally Season Six Adjacent. Now they’re both gunning for them. This is what happens when you leave Chill Town around!

Well, people began pulling keys. Erika, Howie, George, Mike, Marcellas, and Will were all safe. This left one key in the box. Who would go up on the block? We knew Janelle was a sure bet, but would Danielle take the risky route and put James up? Or would she simply nominated Kaysar and play it safe? Will pulled the final key, and it belonged to… Kaysar! That’s right, Janelle and James were up.

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“Expect the unexpected with me,” Danielle said. Nice use of Chenbot Lingo! Or as I like to call it, Chengo!

Danielle tried to explain her choices, but she ultimately wound up employing her new favorite phrase, “It is what it is.” Janelle was not happy with any of this, telling us, “Frankly, I think she’s a bitch.” She then registered shock that James would be up on the block too, especially given his relationship with Danielle. “I hope it’s not all an act,” she said with a goofy smile. Oh Janey. It’s gonna be an uphill battle this week. But then again, if anyone’s been able to squeeze out of a tight spot, it’s Janelle.

Lookin’ forward to the Veto Competition!

What did you think about this episode? Did Danielle make the smartest picks? Or is this plan too entirely risky?

About

38 Comments

  1. 1
    mpatter572@yahoo.com
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:10 am

    I have to admit it, I TIVOED BB and got home just in time for Flavor of Love. FLAV-O-FLAV…this show was SO GOOD that watching Big Brother was like watching grass grow. You know a show is good when after you watch it you feel so dirty you need a shower. Well some night BB does that to me. But last night FLAV stole the night and I had a very late shower. LOL

  2. 2
    Madeyoulaugh
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:17 am

    I thought last nights episode from a sheer game playing POV (point of view, not power of veto) was incredible. The James/Danielle alliance is taking steps and playing the game in a way no one has done before. Its bold, its daring, and despite a 6 minute slow-mo George gets to eat montage, I thought made for killer tv last night.

    MYL

  3. 3
    Ignorant Bliss
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:38 am

    The Will comments on Howie’s eating… Could be my hazy memory but I could have sworn that Will said that his “caloric” intake was in the hippo category, not his cholesterol levels!

  4. 4
    norma rae
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:38 am

    I’m hoping James gets sent out the door, but since he’s got the nullify a vote card, he’s definitely around another week. Love Janelle, but really glad Danielle got HOH. It was time for someone else. I just don’t understand why SOMEONE doesn’t send home Boogie or Will. Really, really frustrating.

  5. 5
    sparky
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:43 am

    All this about “last week’s nominations” is nonsense. For weeks now everyone has been PISSED that HoH wasn’t taking out CT, but suddenly this week they’re no longer a threat? These people are so full of crap.

    I can’t imagine that WillBoogie have any more loyalty to the Legion of Doo than to Janelle. James is SO setting himself up for a crash. And Danielle–twice now she’s going after Janelle. She better know what she’s doing or she’s in for one hell of a smackdown next week.

    Can James use the nullify vote pass now that he can’t vote?

    And one question about the rules of Veto: If the player who wins Veto uses it on someone, can he then be put up for eviction?

  6. 6
    sparky
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 9:51 am

    I figure Janelle has votes from Kaysar and Howie, and just to screw with people one of WillBoogie will vote to keep her. That’s 3.

    James would get Erika, Marcellas, and the other CT.

    That leaves George as the tie breaker. What a week for George. Food plus power!

  7. 7
    Tony A.
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 10:10 am

    Sparky (# 5 & 6), you stole my comments and questions! BUT, I don’t think Janelle will get a boost from either WillBoogie. She only has a shot if Kaysar, Howie or herself win POV. She messed up big time.

    Now, I hated the way Erika threw the HoH comp. She looked cool as a cucumber even after Danielle had her “I quit—no, I don’t” episode. She merely threw it to Danielle in hopes she gets to float a little longer. She’s not a player at all.

    Janelle is so tacky. Did you hear her say she preferred her “Pink Palace” to Danielle’s room? She really is a Barbie and lisping James is not too far off the mark when he calls her an Anna Nicole wannabe when it comes to decorating tastes.

    Sorry, but I think Janelle has spent the time between seasons having half her brain removed. Her choices this year have been disappointing. I don’t care who’s on your side; when you have an alliance of four you hold onto it no matter what. You’ll see the results this week, I’m afraid.

    The Black Widow couldn’t even bother to hug the idiot that gave her the HoH, did you notice? She ignored Erika until she could no longer do that. And she never bothers to acknowledge Erika EVER. Hmmm. Possible secret alliance there?

  8. 8
    Shoe-In
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 10:39 am

    Erika throwing the comp proves why she needed to go last week and why she doesnt even deserve to be in the house to begin with.

    The Chicken George/no slop pass scene brought a little tear to my eye … He looked so utterly pathetic.

  9. 9
    HoneyBunny
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 10:47 am

    Beefcake, Hurricane, Jedi, Big Boy Howie like spider sperm…he cracks me up!

    boogers money bandana and Im Rich B**** shirt -what are you saying – your a butthole? babboon? backwash? bissnitch?

    JameShit said Janey was – “Anna Nichole Smith wanna be is the dumbest person to ever play this game.” Oh -you mean the one who was on BB6 longer than you and has already been HOH this season twice? suck it JameStool.

    cg doing a “you go girl” with the fist in the air was almost as funny as watching him make love to that slice of pizza.

    Does everyone in the house have a secret alliance with everyone else in the house? I can’t keep track.

    hb

  10. 10
    Verbeek16
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:19 am

    After some time, the spider web tilted dramatically, causing Will to say, “Hey, um, Boogie, just so I can make sure, I’m a 33 year-old doctor on a big, giant spider web, right?”

    I was expecting, “Hey, um, Boogie, just so I can make sure, I’m a 33 year-old doctor with a friend named Boogie?”

    James is so screwed. I hope he stays, but I think unless he wins the veto – he’s gone. It is in Will & Mike’s best interest to keep Janelle in the house and we’ve learned that they are the only 2 bright enough to actually go back on their word and vote out the best choice for them. You know, in a GAME that people are trying to WIN

  11. 11
    Verbeek16
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:25 am

    (#5) And one question about the rules of Veto: If the player who wins Veto uses it on someone, can he then be put up for eviction?

    In years past if someone not up for eviction uses the veto to save one of the nominees, that person cannot be then put up for eviction. I don’t know if that’ll be true again this year. It is All Stars after all

  12. 12
    Yota
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:26 am

    Can anyone tell me why the house guests give kaysar so much credit for being some genious strategist? He has allready been voted out twice. And when he gets voted out in the next few weeks it will be number three and the most times voted out in big brother history. How sad is that?

    Take a good look at Erika’s paralized upper lip. That girl needs to lay off the Botox. Freaky.

  13. 13
    sparky
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:38 am

    thanks verbeek. I think it’s an interesting rule, given that not everybody gets to play for Veto.

    And I agree that James is screwed, if only because Will & Boogie are not reliable. But also because nothing ever goes exactly the way HoH wants it to.

    Tony A: I still think Will & Boogie will give a vote to Janey if it throws the current power off balance.

  14. 14
    EdHill
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:44 am

    I like how when they were dangling from the “web” they keep screaming “All stars baby!” as if this challenge was so over the top difficult it could only be done by all stars.

    B-side, how could you not have gotten a screenshot of Erika dangling with her dental floss thong and ass hanging out of her jeans?

    James is such a whiny little C word. I knew hed be the first to backstab teh alliance.

    Erika giving it to dinae was a smart move. You dont want to have to be hte one to put people up and make enemies.

  15. 15
    Greg
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 11:59 am

    For what it’s worth, Danielle did win Head of Household one week during her Season, during the final four week. I went to look it up on CBS’ website because I couldn’t believe that this “All Star” had really floated along that far in her original season. Goody.

    What a shock, Erika was only HOH once her season, too.

  16. 16
    subgenre
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 12:19 pm

    What is up with Diane, Danielle and James calling Janelle “fat”? Is that the worse they can come up with? It just really bugs me since she is SO not fat and it’s like that’s all these puds can think of to put her down with. At least Beau from BB^ said she had “polyester” hair. That was an insult with FLAIR!!!!

    I love Janey and wish people weren’t so quick to count her out. I think she knows a lot more about what is going on then she is given credit for.

    I hate hate HATE James!!! For a while this season, I was giving him the benefit of the doubt. Now, I just want him GONE. Cry me a river, James.

    Someone call James a Whaaambulance!

  17. 17
    sparky
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 12:22 pm

    Danielle didn’t float at all during her season. She didn’t win competitions because she wanted to keep out of the target zone, but she really worked it behind the scenes. She was like Will, busy putting ideas into people’s heads. You could argue that nobody played the game harder during her season.

  18. 18
    watchintv
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 12:43 pm

    I’m a former SeaSix supporter, but I was all for Danielle winning HOH! I think James is really at risk.

    Dr. Will’s doing a great job of deflecting attention off of CT and onto SeaSix. James and Danielle are so obsessed with getting Janey out, that CT will just slip under the radar for yet another week….

  19. 19
    lickitysplit
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 12:50 pm

    Kaysar is nothing but a dumb robot. When Danielle was questioning him, he could have done some really smart playing. Instead, he looked around for answers as if they were written on the wall and acted like a dumbass.

    PS, the Big Boy bit was hilarious.

  20. 20
    carewski
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 1:05 pm

    Thanks for the walk down memory lane, B-Side, with the shout out for Hungry Hungry Hippos. Many a time I played with those voracious plastic pachyderms, munching on marbles to their heart’s content!

  21. 21
    AppleBlossom
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 1:50 pm

    Erika’s thong was classic! I agree with EdHill that we need a screenshot of it.

    One thing I found really interesting with the bit with Will’s back. If I remember correctly from his season, Will is a DO — a Doctor of Osteopathy — as opposed to an MD. DOs are given training during their first two years on osteopathic manipulation, which is a therapeutic treatment using maniupations of bones to achieve a desired effect. Osteopaths believe in a holistic body, meaning that everything affects everything else. For example, manipulation bones in the head and neck can relieve headaches. Anyhow, osteopaths focus a lot on back treatments, which is why I’m surprised that Will would let Kaysar adjust his back because he “saw a chirocpractor do it once.” It makes me wonder about Will.

  22. 22
    cajah
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:02 pm

    I don’t understand everyone’s facination with Janelle. She consistently targets women to her own detriment. James is at least a risk taker; he’s the first of Season 6′s to put up a CT member, and he stuck with the alliance when he put up Jase, even though he didn’t want to. Janelle double crossed him because of a personal vendetta when she put up Diane, not CT like she had promised James. She is the first to break the alliance, not him.

  23. 23
    hmb1974
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:20 pm

    AppleBlossom, as a person who’s experienced extreme back pain, I know that at some point you’re willing to let anyone attempt to fix you in the hope that the pain will just go away.

  24. 24
    JasonR
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 2:30 pm

    I’m pretty sure Will is a dermatologist, not a D.O.

  25. 25
    byebyebitches
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 3:11 pm

    I disagree with saying Janelle only goes after girls, last season, the friendship was ALL girls (exclude Beau if you want.) who else would she nominate? This year the first two people to try and scheme to get Janelle out were Danielle and Allison, why wouldn’t she nominate them. And then last week, she just didn’t want to nom CT. I’m happy she’s nominated this week, just so she can win the veto (janelle works the best under pressure!) and dani’s plan can backfire, hopefully with a James eviction.

  26. 26
    juddfan
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 3:42 pm

    subgenre, I’m with you, James is toast, and it’s the same kind of stupidity that got him voted out last time. I’m certain CT will keep Janelle around, and I’m pretty sure CG would vote who Howie wants him to vote for, besides, James has an angry, shifty energy, and would best be disposed of. Since CG made it that one time, I think he’ll get pretty far.

    I think the BB will sway this veto for Janelle’s favor, and frankly, I think Dani’s not so against James going, despite the “Legion of Doom”

    Didn’t Will even say he considered Janelle a part of his secret alliance, whichever one it’s called.

    Wish I hadn’t peeked at the HOH winner, as it was half the frickin’ episode! TG Tivo has a long ass pause . . . took me hours to get through that one . . .

    Lastly, if James goes, then sweet bliss of life, just one more blight to remove–do I really have to say who!

    boogers money bandana and Im Rich B**** shirt -what are you saying – your a butthole? babboon? backwash? bissnitch?–Good one, HB, I love it when you’re scathing!!!

    And I agree, Janelle is NOT fat!!!!!

  27. 27
    asmaj
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 5:29 pm

    Dr. Will does have a DO, but did his residency in dermatology.

  28. 28
    c-wise
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 7:52 pm

    James and the Legion of Douche can kiss Howie’s fat ass. No one should be dissing Janelle like that. And didn’t we all learn last year that she shouldn’t be underestimated?

    Chicken George makes for some cringeworthy television. Maybe that ‘honorary sista’ can guest star on Flavor of Love. He’s already got the nickname.

  29. 29
    zoo keeper
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 8:48 pm

    Is anyone else confused/disgusted by James’ self-righteousness toward Janelle? I’m hardly a fan of Malibu Barbie’s, but (a) on what planet is she fat? and (b) who was so obsessed with ridding the house of the scourge of Chicken George’s cunning not so long ago? If he showed a little less self-interest and a little more savvy game play, I wouldn’t mind his tirades so much, but someone shut him up, please! I hope he gets voted out this week — Janie’s not a real contender anyway, and my faith in humanity would be shattered if whining James wins.

    As for HOH… Erika didn’t even pause before giving HOH to Danielle. What was that? And Danielle, are you kidding me with that whole victory grunt sequence? Erika could have wiped up the spider jizz with Danielle if they’d had to duke it out in that competition. A little humility (not to mention that thank you hug) might not have been too much to ask for given the circumstances.

    btw, why does everyone hate ChillTown so much? I mean, clearly Boogie’s a moron (a.k.a. a grown man who let’s people call him “Boogie”), and you know he was the kid in high school who survived socially by glomming on to some future frat boy no matter how much their friends mocked him, and Dr. Will is a trained medical practitioner who let’s Kaysar adjust him. But still, they’re damn entertaining. Do we really want to see a Big Brother house without them?

  30. 30
    zoobabe
    Posted August 7, 2006 at 10:33 pm

    #29- interesting comments. Interesting screen name. I agree with your comments (except that Janie IS a contender).

  31. 31
    Intrepid
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 7:12 am

    Actually, Will did not hurt his back at the end of the “spider web” challenge. He picked up Boogie after he won veto last week and threw out his back, then Boogie kicked the goggles, and we know how that turned out… so in reality, that would be a double injury in one game!

  32. 32
    jack
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 7:28 am

    thank god for the black widow. i’m still a compulsive sea-sick supporter, but their dominance of HoH was really getting old. it made me remember that a big part of what made us like them in the first place was watching them in the underdog role, fighting against the tyrannical self-righteousness of ‘cappy’ and ‘the friendship’ (god, i can’t even type that word without cringing). now, they’re guaranteed to lose somebody, which is probably a good thing.

    the best part is that for the first time in the game, a genuinely talented strategist and manipulator is in the power position. kaysar likes to think of himself as some sort of grand-master of strategy, and james likes to pat himself on the back for being shamelessly unscrupulous, but the fact is that none of the sea-sixers has ever demonstrated even a shred of the strategic acumen danielle and will employed in their respective seasons.

    of course, janelle is the main target, which grieves me, but she has saved herself many times in the past–beating james on numerous occasions–so i wouldn’t sing her dirge just yet. sadly, a veto win for janelle will only mean that kaysar will probably be going, as james seems to have the temporary protection of danielle, marcellas, and chill-town, and danielle doesn’t seem like the type to pull a jennifer and renege on her promise not to nominate howie.

    still, between janelle and kaysar, i’d rather see kaysar go, as he is greatly overrated as a strategist and has been practically invisible this summer, including during his week as HoH. janelle, on the other hand, seems to be inspiring a friendship-level degree of irrational hatred from james, marcellas, and the other girls, and it will be fun watching her scramble to stay in the game with everyone after her. i hope she gets off the block somehow.

    this edition was a real snooze–the HoH comp was dragged out way too long, the segment on howie’s weight fluctuation was some of the dullest filler since ivette introduced the ‘ghetto slip-n-slide,’ and the swelling violins of sentimentality around chicken george’s slop furlough were genuinely gag-worthy.

    i’ve also had about enough of james’ and marcellas’ cruel and overstated betrayal of janelle. yeah, she was stupid to play into chill-town’s hands, and yeah, if she wanted to take out a floater, she should have gone after someone more dangerous than diane (who seemed defeated from the moment she entered the house and showed none of the bitchy fire that was her trademark in season 5), but all of this shit about janelle being dumb and fat is as petty as it is transparently untrue. it seems unlikely given the lay of the land, but i would LOVE to see one of those smug, self-righteous backstabbers sitting down with the chenbot thursday night, totally bamboozled and humiliated.

  33. 33
    juddfan
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 10:05 am

    here-here, Jack!

    I’m gonna predict that Janie will get off the block, and Kaysar will take her place. If I were a member of the sea-six, who would I keep in a James to Kaysar show down . . . hmmmm, the backstabbing piece of lispy trash calling my girl fat, or the quiet invisible one . . . . hmmmm.

    They will have to pick one, even if it’s a member of their alliance . . .

    Anyway, I can hope, can’t I!?

  34. 34
    sparky
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 10:38 am

    My scenario: Kaysar wins veto, takes off Janelle; Danielle promised not to nominate Howie, so that leaves her Doom partners or a floater. No safe way out of this one, for Danielle or for James.

    I still think that in a direct vote, Janelle has a fighting chance.

  35. 35
    pjtvqueen
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 10:52 am

    I would love to see James go. I’m sick of him thinking he’s better than everyone else. And you can tell he thinks he’s some huge mastermind for playing different sides, but he’s not very good at it.

    Erika should also go. She’s boring, and I really hated when she just gave up the HOH for Danielle like that. Maybe they had an agreement going, but regardless, she was dumb to just drop like that. Anyone playing stupid like that should just leave.

    I’m also a little tired of Marcellas…but I’m not too worried, he’ll probably be gone soon.

    I’m praying for a twist with the veto ceremony, as frusterated as I was with Janelle when she fell right into CT’s plans, I would love for her to stick around just to prove all the naysayers wrong. (and I agree with everyone else, where do these people get their definitions of fat?) I think I am with almost everyone else here with saying it’s a nice change of pace to have someone else in the HOH room, finally the pot will start to be stirred and people’s true colors can start to come out.

    Also, does anyone know exactly how James’ nullify a vote thing works? Does that mean after the votes have been taken he can blindly pick someone and say their vote is no good? Or does he just cancel out one vote against himself, regardless of who made it?

  36. 36
    zoo keeper
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 10:52 am

    hey, zoobabe… my animals picked the name — they have no qualms about letting me know my place in the order of things. Cool monkey shot.

    Sparky, I definitely agree that Janelle could carry a vote simply because I think the castmembers like the social drama and eye candy that she provides. I don’t, however, see how she could actually win the game, zoobabe, because she broadcasts her strategy and her presence too visibly for anyone to let her get through too far.

  37. 37
    zoo keeper
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 11:12 am

    Oh, yeah, Jack, I totally let Marcellas’ comments slide. I think it’s my own denial about his true nature. I really wanna love him because he’s so pretty and possesses such snappy fashion sense. But it’s getting harder and harder to overlook the Gucci swinging theatrics and virtual absence of strategic effort. Not that I consider Amy (the new host of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, Reality Star Edition, soon to feature the love nest of Amber and Rob) to be a credible character witness, but Marcellas is showing himself, yet again, to be utilitarian and flighty in his loyalties, which doesn’t suggest clever manouvering so much as a lack of depth. Sigh. Maybe he’s just PMSing and we can love him again in a few days.

  38. 38
    chick110
    Posted August 8, 2006 at 2:49 pm

    Ok, WTF with Marcellas kicking that egg piece at the end of that challenge… Did he not see what happened to Booger (almost typed Boobie, LOL, probably about the same… a stupid name for a stupid guy)? Maybe he just wanted the attention and a quick trip outta the house??? Hmmm.

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