Recap: Big Brother: All We Are Is Dustin The Wind

Big Brother

By Schoonie | Friday, August 17, 2007 | 12:26 am | 34 Comments

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Previously on Big Brother: Daniele whined and whined and whined and whined and whined and whined and whined and whined. In between some other stuff happened, and it was awesome. Who will go home tonight, Dick or Dustin?

Julie is dressed like a snake tonight. Seriously, her top is all reptile and shit, which is why she is now the:

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CHENACONDA

Julie reviews the week that just took place, talking about how “never has any nominee gone so far to protect the other” and then how Dick “unleashed his wrath on the other houseguests to make himself the bigger target”. Since I didn’t recap Tuesday, let me just say: Julie is full of shit. If Dick were being an asshole to protect his daughter, he would have stopped after he won the veto, which he did not. He also wouldn’t have been his meanest before the nominations were even announced, as we saw during Sunday’s show with Jameka and Amber.

Further, he’s not even good at being an asshole. Calling a gay man “Princess” and continuing to use Jesus against Amber and Jameka is going back into the same old bag of tricks continually. That’s not being an “asshole”, that’s being “lame”. He’s like, the Rob Schneider of assholes.

Nonetheless, if you want to be an asshole, cool, just don’t hide behind this cloak of nobility like you’re doing it for your daughter. You’re doing it because you enjoy being an asshole, and you just want to legitimize it. I don’t doubt that he loves her, but this whole thing is painted to be noble and selfless, when it’s all actually really self-centered and comes from a motivation for Dick to appear to be some sort of martyr. Well, here’s some news: you were doing this mean bullshit before, and I’m wagering that you’ll continue to do it after. You’re not noble for it. You’re just an asshole.

And this whole thing (and stay with me here) makes Daniele an even bigger asshole than Dick for letting it happen on her behalf all “I can’t stop him!” and smirking while she brushes her teeth, and then crying in the HoH about how people shouldn’t hold her responsible when…they sort of should. A lot. And I’m done!

Y’all, I just wish Daniele would just give him a hug and break the cycle. Fuck, now I’m not even sure if that’s a joke.

After the veto ceremony, Amber congratulates Dick about how nice he was, because of COURSE she would buy an empty gesture like that hook, line, and sinker. Daniele talks about how being in the house is the opportunity of a lifetime, and for Dick to give that up for her means a lot. I mean, not enough to tell the guy that you love him or acknowledge his action in any way, which I have yet to see, unless you have spelled out “I LOVE YOU DAD” by crying in Morse code.

Jess and Dustin talk about how in a worst case scenario, it’s a 3-3 split, so they probably have nothing to worry about. Then one of Dustin’s gray shirts rises out of his suitcase, origami-s itself into the shape of a crow, and lands on his shoulder.

After a segment in which Eric tries to explain away his “sickness” from Tuesday night and Jess buys it hook, line, and sinker, Zach makes dinner for Jessica in the backyard. He basically tells her that he’ll vote however she tells him to, which is pretty much the right move for him. I can’t believe he is still sitting there. Jen too. They’re drinking Coors out of wine glasses, like this is the best Spring Formal ever.

Eric goes to get his AP order, which, of course, tells him to target Dustin, because America loves people who love their kids, even when those people have almost no other redeeming qualities. Other than the fact that they now the lead singer of Van Halen. No, not that one. The other one. No, the other other one.

Eric goes into the HoH to try to convince Jessica to get rid of Dustin. He starts in on Jess and in the middle of his intro she gets hot and decides to take off her shirt. Eric, of course, gets distracted (as we “breeders” are wont to do when boobies make an appearance). Eric gets all squealy and Jason Biggs as the sound effects guys insert all sorts of awesome wacky awkward teenage sex romp noises. That kind of thing is what makes this show awesome. Well, that and the great casting job they do every year. Then there are a whole bunch of weird edits where she ends up telling him to leave and then sighs, but the shots are so obviously out of order that they may well have been taken from one of Hitler’s treasure vaults.

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Um, sometimes, when I get nervous, I stick my hands in my armpits, like this.

Dick goes to Eric and tells him that with the alliance that he’s in now, he can only trust half the people. Then he proposes and alliance between Eric, Jess, himself and Daniele. So, according to Dick, Eric’s better off with the people who spun a web of lies to try to get him out last week. Pausing to take my socks off and get to my toes, this means that he can’t trust roughly two of the four people in the alliance that Dick proposes, which makes…30 percent? Oh my god, Eric would be much better off! He should totally do it! On the other hand, he gets to be in an alliance in which one of the members is not Amber, so that would pretty much be my decision right there.

Later in the backyard, Eric goes to Jess about getting rid of Dustin. He tries to think of a good reason, but there really isn’t one except for the fact that he wants to accomplish his task. It’s a good thing Jessica’s kind of paranoid about everyone, though. Basically, Eric thinks that aligning with the stronger people will make it easier to pick off the easier ones, because Amber is weak and Jameka can’t compete and Jen and Zach are still (remarkably) free boots. Jessica looks…nervous. She shouldn’t be, she can come off looking pretty clean if she does this right.

After the break, it’s time for Chenaconda to interview the houseguests. Julie starts off by asking Dick what it was like to save himself with the veto, which makes everyone laugh. Pronouns: when you have no genitalia and live a sad sexless robot life, you’ll mess them up, too.

Chen then puts Daniele on the spot (her questions are awesome and sneaky tonight, by the way, which makes me think she might actually be part snake) and asks her whether she would have done the same thing for her dad. The answer is no, of course, so she hems and haws about how luckily, she wasn’t in that situation, but she’d like to think she would have. Now let’s all hold hands and dance!

And now, my favorite moment of the entire episode. Julie baits the hook by congratulating everyone for making it halfway, then she throws the line out and hooks Amber right in the cheek. Amber has removed her braids, and her hair actually looks really good, so…that’s my nice thing about Amber for the season. Julie asks Amber if there’s anything she would like to tell her family! Who is watching right now!

Julie said the F word, which is Amber’s cue to begin bawling. Seriously, it’s amazing, it’s like a split second change. Amber’s expression goes from its normal bitchface to sprawling mess in about two seconds. It is literally the coolest thing I have ever seen not involving Jen or a tetherball. Can we get some time-lapse photography up in this bitch?

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WAH?

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WAH!



It’s like one of those videos where a flower grows from a seed, blooms beautifully, and then dies. Except I feel pity for the flower.

And now, it’s time to talk to Joe! About Dustin! Haven’t we all missed this? No? Sadly, we don’t even get to see Joe’s lower half, so we will never know if his Joe-rts make an appearance or not. He is, however, wearing a Pendant of Life from Legends of the Hidden Temple.

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Someone’s spent my time since being evicted exploring the Shrine of the Silver Monkey!



Joe talks all about Dustin, his choice to take the prizes and how it was selfish for him to just look out for himself. To prove this, Dustin walks around the house in his king’s robe. Joe, you can’t judge people by how they dress. Let he who has not worn a poncho on live television cast the first pair of Crocs, or whatever. Also, as I’ve said before, the concept of selfishness does not apply to competition reality shows. Haven’t you heard about the new rules? Everyone on Big Brother wins the money! Time for more dancing!

Also time to talk to Jessica in the HoH room! Slap another notch on the Jessica Hotwatch Tally. I know, I don’t understand it either. Jessica tells us that she put up Dustin because she questions the allegiance of some of the people in her alliance; she also says that she trusts Eric and Jameka the most out of all the people in the LNC. Julie scores another direct hit when she asks Jess about her romantic feelings for Eric. And Jessica actually responds with a maybe! Good for Eric! I can’t even mock that, it’s pretty impressive.

Time for the live vote. Dustin tells everyone in his final words that he hopes that everyone decides to make the next six weeks as much fun as the first six weeks, whatever that means. Dude, I’ve been dealing with Amber’s broke ass for six weeks? Dick tells everybody that his only regret is that Carol isn’t there to give him a kiss goodbye, or something. I think it’s an inside joke. Otherwise, it’s squandered opportunity to make a good Carol joke.



Amber votes first, and she votes to evict HER NECKLACE, HATE. Also, she votes to evict Dick. Eric has to vote to evict Dustin, and talks about how he decided to embrace America’s Choice even though it’s not his own. And, say what you want about Eric, but: props to him and him alone for the outcome this week. We told him to do something, he saw an opportunity to do it, and he took it. Dick’s proposal would never have had a shot if America hadn’t told him to evict Dustin, so he’s living up to his end of the bargain, for sure.

Jameka looks like Alicia Keys this week as she votes to evict Dick. Daniele votes to keep her father around and evict Dustin. Zach votes to evict Dustin, and then Jen comes in wearing what may or may not be a baton twirler’s uniform and votes to evict Dustin.

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All this needs is one of those tall hats. Am I right?



With that, he is out. Of the house, I mean. Julie tells Dustin (with no “Dick, you are safe” mindmeld, which is a missed opportunity on her part) that he is evicted, and the totally awesome camera guys cut right to Amber. AMAZING. Before Dustin is even out of his chair, Amber is crying.

Oh, sorry, I forgot about my rule from last week. We had a brief respite from Amber’s constant bawling and I forgot. Rewrite!

Before Dustin is even out of his chair, Amber is performing the choreography from an Off-Broadway musical adaptation of “Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.” Look at her go! Dustin hugs some of the houseguests goodbye (but not Eric) and exits the house quickly, clearly stunned. The second he goes out the door, the houseguests scatter to different areas, because literally nobody wants to talk about it. It’s like the exact opposite of last week.



Back in Chen’s lair, she notes that Dustin is a little stunned. You will be surprised to know that he concurs. He tells Julie that Eric is a liar and was the fourth vote against him, and that’s why he’s evicted. Julie rubs it in by asking whether he regrets volunteering, and he pretty much tells her no, but he is totally about to cry, you can tell.

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I’m not crying, it’s a side effect of the antibiotics.



In his goodbye videos, Dick rubs it in and takes credit for the boot, which is wrong and wrong. Jen is her usual hilarious self, telling Dustin that tanning was “um…fun” after her usual goodbye introduction. Daniele (who just called Dustin “the fakest person in the house”) tells him that it’s been really nice getting to know him. And she means it! And is not fake!

And then…Amber. She spends her entire goodbye video reciting passages from Homer’s Odyssey, and tells Dustin that she loves him. SO, SO MUCH. And then she wipes some iambic pentameter from her eye. I seriously can’t wait for her eviction interview. Is Julie Chen allowed to get wet, or does she short circuit?

Julie shuffles Dustin off to the jury house so that she can start the HoH competition, which involves some questions about a variety of wacky visitors that the house received over the last week. Zach wakes up in the morning to find a creepy midget lounging on the couch in the living room. I can’t tell you how many times that’s happened to me. Each time, I swear to drink less bourbon, and each time, I fail.

The midget runs around the house falling all over himself and spouting random catchphrases. The best part is when the midget runs into the bathroom and Jameka gets all freaked out and goes, “Yo, he’s comin’ this way!” and tries to hide. Little known fact: it’s really hard to hide from a midget. It is not because they are small, but because they can see through walls.

In the backyard, a whole bunch of random crap is going on. There’s a pirate on stilts (which I take to be a subtle jab at Mark Burnett), and a barber shop quartet singing Big Brother songs. Amber looks scared. Isn’t she from Vegas? Don’t people like this grab her ass every time she goes to work?

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This is taking a lot of attention away from me. I’d better go find a fad from five years ago to exploit. Anybody know where I can get a Tamagotchi?



And then, when they go back inside, there’s more random crap. There are rabbits, and one of those human statues that occupy the mall at the Venetian Hotel. The thing is, none of this is half as weird as the people actually occupying the house. It’s like taking someone who’s double jointed to the circus. The double jointed guy’s gonna be like, “Look what I can do!” and the circus people are going to be like, “Big whoop. Now watch me cry for eighteen hours without stopping.”

Julie will be asking a bunch of questions about all the random stuff that happened. Get a question wrong, you’re out. Last person in is HoH. The first question is about the pirate on stilts, and Jen gets it wrong and is out. Apparently she misunderstood the directions or something, and she spends the rest of the show kicking herself. Dick and Zach get eliminated on the next question, leaving only Amber, Dani, and Eric. Eric gets knocked out on the next question, so Amber and Dani are the last two. Dani gets the last question right, and she is HoH. She begins celebrating all over the place, but…I’m not excited. When things are going her way, she’s perfectly enjoyable to watch, but when they’re not, all she does is cry and whine, and then she shuts down. It’s really annoying.

After the commercial, Julie messes with Amber some more, which is something that I could watch for an hour straight. It never gets old. How does Amber feel about Dustin being gone? You will be shocked to hear that the answer is WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH. But Amber only gets to WA, and then Julie awesomely cuts her off. Hi five for Chenaconda this week! She kicked ass, even though she flubbed a couple of lines.

About

Like most people in America, Schoonie watches entirely too much reality television.  Unlike most people, Schoonie gets to share his opinions with the world, which is pretty rad.  Currently living in Chicago, Schoonie's been with Tvgasm since 2006.  He spends his free time writing Survivor fan fiction (Letters to Penthouse, all featuring Rupert!) , playing with his cover band, and playing with his other cover band. Also, this one time, Lisi fell.

34 Comments

  1. 1
    CheriesTake
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 1:22 am

    Chenaconda……I love that.
    I also love, and when I say love I mean hate, the way Chenaconda keeps trying to make Dick into some sort of hero. He dumped his kids on his mother and his daughter didn’t speak to him for years because they argued over money he had loaned her that she didn’t pay back. Isn’t it a law that kids don’t have to pay parents back, ever. Anyway, I digress, Dick is an asswipe but it was sort of hilarious to see the look on Dustin’s face. Dick better sleep with one crusty eye open. Jameka’s liable to sneak into his room and stab him thru the heart with a crucifix. In the name of Jesus! Taste God, Taste God!

  2. 2
    CheriesTake
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 1:28 am

    Oh and by the way, great recap. I was swishing mouthwash when I sat down to read it and before I realized that this was a poor idea I laughed and spit mouthwash on the keyborad and monitor! Oh well, I needed the laugh and the monitor and keyboard needed cleaning. I’m a multi-tasker!

  3. 3
    Corri2
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 4:29 am

    Awesome recap, Schoonie! Thanks for getting it up at warp speed! A recap first thing in the morning makes the morning more bearable.

    The show was great. I was torn on who I wanted out. Dick has really been getting on my nerves lately and a few days ago I was beyond ready for him to go home. And while I don’t dislike Dustin, I knew it would be hilarious if he got the boot. And it was! I am not thrilled that Dani won HOH but better her than Amber. If she had won all we’d be hearing this week (in between crying)is “This is for Dustin”. Ugh. Ahyhoo, should be an interesting week.

  4. 4
    Laska
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 5:33 am

    Curses on you, SYTYCD for getting started before BB8-you made me lose track of time and made me miss this awesomeness! Loved the Chenaconda and the poncho/crocs phrase! Bye Dustin!

  5. 5
    Laska
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 5:35 am

    Curses on you, SYTYCD for getting started before BB8-you made me lose track of time and made me miss this awesomeness! Loved the Chenaconda and the poncho/crocs phrase! Bye Dustin!

  6. 6
    Gabtor
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 6:12 am

    Hey, you guys, can anyone help with two burning questions: (1) How come the last two evictions or so, Julie hasn’t shown the evictee a clip of Eric explaining the AP twist? Will jury members know about it, or not? (2) Julie said Amber’s daughter is FIVE, then Amber said she’s starting “3RD GRADE” next week – How is that possible?

  7. 7
    Tony A.
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 6:31 am

    ogodogodogod, I didn’t taste you this ep. Can’t say I like Dustin but now ED is in a position of power. This is going to be bad; I can see a final 3 of ED, Dicklet and Jen. Or maybe Zach, whose perfidy last night was the real cause of Dustin’s ouster that asswipe Dick took credit for! Now he’s really full of hubris, which I hope will lead him to a hilarious exit.

    Can anyone be more selfish than Danielle? She’s slimier than her Dad and even knows it. Love Chenaconda cornering her with the questioning…er, um, ah…

    Honestly, as far as liking someone enough to win, Jess wins my vote. Her boobs neutralize that squeaky voice and she’s kind of likeable.

    The only thing I’m going to love this week is Dick’s reverting to his asshole, arrogant ways. I want to see Eric cringe. I realize his anti-Dustin campaign was commanded by America, but he did seem to take to it well, thus leading ED to believe his “secret” chat with Eric had done the trick. Or, as Jen would put it, it was…fun.

  8. 8
    IHeartDani
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 6:48 am

    I could not have been happier with the outcome. First of all just the look on Dustin’s face was worth listening to Dick berate any and all houseguests.

    Dick saying that about Carol was due to a bet that he lost in beer pong.

  9. 9
    c-rock
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 6:55 am

    Okay I’m sick of trying to deny it. ED is funny. I hope he wins. Everyone else is boring. I thought his “princess” comments were a riot, as were his hands clasperd in prayer during Jameka’s turn during the veto competition the other night.
    GO ED!

  10. 10
    aloveaffairwithtivo
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 7:26 am

    Gabtor:

    I’m with you on the questioning on Amber having a 5 year old in 3rd grade. I’ll bet it was a malfunction in the Chenbot/Chenaconda’s programming. I doubt Amber’s daughter is so gifted she miraculously passed ahead 3 grades! I rewound the DVR to make sure I heard that right…but I did!

  11. 11
    Pegster
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 7:34 am

    While I’m glad to see Dustin get a kick in the ego, I am not happy that TheDick will be around for at least 2 more weeks. I don’t think his homophobic rants were at all amusing and were way over the line.

    I’m surprised that so many people seem to find him amusing. He’s a vile piece of garbage.

  12. 12
    divinemissc
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 7:48 am

    Why didn’t Julie tell Dustin that Eric is “America’s Player”?

  13. 13
    poor, dead shannon
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 7:57 am

    holy crap Schoonie…. that recap title ranks up there as one of the best ever… i nearly pissed myself laughing at that one…

    now i’ll read the recap.

    PDS
    President, Team Dani

  14. 14
    Foxbase Alpha
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 8:08 am

    divinemissc,

    The reason why Chenbot didn’t tell Dustin that Eric is “America’s Player” is that Justin is going to be a part of the final jury sequestered away in Mexico that will vote for the winner in the end.

  15. 15
    kensrus
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 8:37 am

    Hilarious recap Schoonie!

    Did you see how fast Dustin’s jaw dropped when Chenbot told him he was evicted? His reaction was priceless! It is too bad the cameras cut to Amber’s efforts to make party hats for the American soldiers in Iraq so quickly. Anyhow, I think the REAL game has finally begun. (Dick — gotta love him!)

    Note to Tony A.: Perfedy?? I thought I was the only one who used that word on a daily basis! Further proof that those Word-A-Day calendars actually work!

  16. 16
    poor, dead shannon
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 8:38 am

    i am beside myself with glee.

    PS. great recap Schoonie

    PDS
    President….. oh u know the rest.

  17. 17
    lickitysplit
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 9:06 am

    “He is, however, wearing a Pendant of Life from Legends of the Hidden Temple.”

    I have no words. That is too funny.

    Dustin’s face was great when he was evicted. It was smile, smile, BAM, open mouth. We rewound that about seventeen times.

    My other fave part: when Chen cut off Amber’s final meltdown. “How do you feel now that Dustin’s gone?” “Well, I’m–” “Okay, that’s enough out of you.” It was perfect!

  18. 18
    johnrambo
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 9:32 am

    amber’s daughter is 8 as she has previously mentioned before. it’s also in line with going into 3rd grade.

  19. 19
    cajah
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 9:58 am

    Go Eric!

    I hope he wins it with this huge AP hinderence. When he called Amber “royally garbarge” or something like that, we were cracking up.

  20. 20
    Shollia
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 10:07 am

    Yeah Amber has said her daughter is 8. Chenbot just malfunctioned alot last night and got it wrong.
    HILARIOUS recap!
    Chenaconda… that is just awesome.

    But yeah… we pretty much see eye to eye on everything. Dani is a spoiled little whiney brat… Dick is a moron… and the rest of them.. meh.

    Eric is growing on me if he could just shut his twitchy self up. And Jess is coming out to be my fav. She’s totally cute and perky and just awesome.

  21. 21
    sweetblondie
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 10:13 am

    I also am surprised at the Dick “fans”.
    He’s a 5 yr old that still throws temper tantrums and tries to bully people into submission. It’s infuriating and at this point I can’t help but hold his mother partially responsible. Even Daniele whines and whines like a baby when things don’t go her way. Was there NO discipline in that house? Geesh…

    And to President, Team Dani, are you really attracted to this snivelling, spoiled, anorexic? Yikes…

    And I also think Eric is doing a fantastic job and if he by chance does win this thing, then to me, he will officially be a better player than Dr. Botox.

    But I’m still rooting for Jen!!!

  22. 22
    pq
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 11:33 am

    great recap schoonie! chenaconda–hahahahaha

    i’m pretty much meh about Dustin leaving–although i did like him a little more after he took the prizes in that PoV. at least he is coming away with much more than all the other losers. i couldn’t really support him because of his alliance with Amber. she is almost as annoying as Dick. hopefully they can get rid of her this week.

    Eric is doing a really good job dealing with the AP bs–considering his choice was do it or you aren’t on the show. he just needs to try to play in the background a little more, which he was doing just fine until that stupid plane.

  23. 23
    CheriesTake
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 11:45 am

    I love the scene with Eric and Jess in the bedroom. She knew exactly what she was doing when she took off her shirt! The power of boobies, it’s just amazing. For several seconds Eric didn’t know how to form words. I think she was joking when she told him to leave but he was so rattled he scurried away. My soon- to-be is all “where’s he going” and I’m like “To whack it duh”.

  24. 24
    lesfull
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 11:45 am

    I don’t think Eric has a chance of winning because of the whole banner thing. It seems like he knows this and is just trying to win as much being the AP as possible.

  25. 25
    anw821
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 1:12 pm

    poor, dead shannon: America agrees with us. Where do I get my jacket?

  26. 26
    poor, dead shannon
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    sweetblondie said: “And to President, Team Dani, are you really attracted to this snivelling, spoiled, anorexic? Yikes…”

    yup. maybe it’s my name. we Nick’s seem to have a soft spot for the snivelling and anorexic… and i’ll give you those, but spoiled? really?

    anw821 said: “poor, dead shannon: America agrees with us. Where do I get my jacket?”

    LOL. it’s a growing club… the jackets are goin’ like hotcakes.

    PDS
    Prez, Team Dani

    War the look on Dustin’s face last night. (best TV moment of the year)

  27. 27
    Tony A.
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 2:02 pm

    Kensrus:

    It’s perfIdy, and I get my words from “So you want to increase your word power?” from Reader’s Digest, just like all the other old farts. I love skewing the demographics in this site; I sign up for Medicare in 3 months! You youngsters keep working out there, y’hear?

  28. 28
    CSIS
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 7:57 pm

    Chenaconda…soo funny I had to skip ahead and comment before I could continue to read the recap. The Chenbot has morphed into the Chenaconda…Nice!

  29. 29
    nerrawllehctim
    Posted August 17, 2007 at 8:33 pm

    In the first recap of the season, you said that this could be totally awful. But it’s not. Wait, it’s not supposed to. IT’S BIG BROTHER.

    Oh, and Schoonie, Van Halen just reunited. With David Lee Roth.

  30. 30
    jack
    Posted August 18, 2007 at 5:21 pm

    Say what you will about Dick–he is the star of the show. He’s like a cross between Dr. Will, Howard Stern, and Keith Richards before the blood transfusion. He is self-absorbed, delusional, crude, pointlessly cruel, repetitive (I would like to see a law requiring one to immediately bitch-slap anyone who uses the expression ‘it is what it is’), inexplicably vain–and, in point of fact, totally irresistible to watch. You don’t have to like him (I don’t), but I doubt I’d have been able to sustain interest in this show if he’d been voted out.

    Yes, Dick’s relentless badgering of poor Jameka’s outspoken religiousness is off-putting, but isn’t he sort of right? I mean, I know Jameka’s sincere about her faith, and I’m sure it’s a source of great comfort and strength for her, but aren’t all of Dick’s antagonistic remarks more or less on point? And what would this season be without Dick there to inspire Jameka’s hilarious prayer sessions (and those hilarious organ music overdubs)? And without Jameka’s Dick-inspired holy-rolling, would we have been treated to Amber’s awful, hate-worthy parroting act of false piety with her totally f’in stupid prayers to god to help her win the veto? And who else but Dick could have turned a self-obsessed airhead like Jen into probably the 2nd most likable player left in the game (after Jess) by giving her a chance to show how above it all she is with her cool indifference to his harassment and insults? (Of course, she is probably a sociopath, but, still . . .)

    And hating Dick for being so clueless about the blatant ludicrousness of his efforts to transform himself into ‘America’s favorite Deadbeat Dad’ has been more fun than making snide remarks about Hillary Clinton’s cankles.

    The best part about Dick is that he has no clue how little influence he really has in the game. I’m not a huge Eric fan, but the dude is running the show, and has managed to survive in spite of some serious roadblocks courtesy of America (or, rather, all of those fat women with multiple cats and lots of special sweatshirts to celebrate the holidays who account for the majority of the America’s Choice votes).

    And I LOVED watching Dustin get such a sweet comeuppance after being largely responsible for steering what was once a pretty cool alliance into a gaggle of holier-than-thous of near-’friendship’ proportions. Disregarding the last two weeks in which he started getting a little pissy, I liked Dustin, but his fag-hag relationship with Amber was enough, in Schoonie’s words, to make him ‘dead to me.’ The look on his face when he found out he’d been evicted was priceless. This ‘America’s Player’ thing will probably cost Eric in the long run, but it–and Dick–have stirred the pot in a house of people who’d otherwise be perfectly content to sit around picking their toenails and arguing about who is this season’s Janelle or Howie.

    Remember, Big Brother isn’t about watching good people exercise shrewd, clever reasoning or triumph over adversity. It’s about watching a bunch of unjustifiably egocentric people with little to no self-awareness act like bratty morons and make fools of themselves for the purpose of our collective mockery and derision. That, my friends, in the immortal words of Jase, is what I call ‘Good TV.’

  31. 31
    cajah
    Posted August 18, 2007 at 8:31 pm

    Amen!

  32. 32
    kensrus
    Posted August 19, 2007 at 10:45 am

    Wow Jack! You hit the nail on the head! Excellent.

    Note to Tony A: Okay, I had to find the word in the dictionary, then I spelled it wrong. What a doofus! (lol) Skewer away!

  33. 33
    anniedawg25
    Posted August 19, 2007 at 2:53 pm

    ALL WE ARE IS DUST IN THE WIND, DUDE.

    DUST.
    WIND.
    DUDE.

  34. 34
    nerrawllehctim
    Posted August 25, 2007 at 10:20 am

    Dustin’s face was priceless. He is now the Edgardo of this show.

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